Tossing Salt Presents:
Would You Rather:
Tough Decisions #1
June 3, 2023
DougMaynard.com

Our world is full of decisions that need to be made. Over in the land of Tweets, a lovely lady named Samantha decided to ask a few amazing questions where a choice needs to be made. It looks pretty cool and I decided to take a chance and make a call. This or that? Let’s find out.

Have to drive in a kid’s power car forever, Or Eat baby food for the rest of your days?

Some of that baby food is pretty yummy and I love me some Puffs, but every day? No, thank you. Let’s see what we can do with that car.

Watch the same tv show every day for the rest of your life, Or no more music ever again?

I rarely watch TV, but I love my music. I’ll suck it up and watch that television. Do I get to pick the show?

Live in a world with no women whatsoever, Or Be mute for the rest of your life?

Some of my best friends are women, but I quite often don’t feel like talking. I can deal with being mute. That’s why we have notepads.

Be stuck in a pitch-black room with a giant spider, Or Live in a very used shoe forever?

Absolutely hell no to anything having to do with a spider. I’ll take the shoe. Where are my odor eaters at? Hell, I’ve lived in worse places.

Move to a place where no one speaks English, AT ALL, Or Shrink to the size of a toddler?

Be unable to communicate with anyone or be a little person. If it works for Brad Williams, then it can work for me. I’m adorable. So shrink me, baby!

Swim in the ocean full of sharks, Or a jungle full of tigers?

So long as I don’t have any open wounds and they don’t mistake me for a seal or walrus, I should be okay with the sharks. Tigers are beautiful animals, but because of that bitch, Carole Baskin, they’ll probably be looking for human flesh. She got them spoiled.

Drink from a sippy cup for the rest of your life, Or have to wear a diaper forever?

A sippy cup works for me. It’s not the cup that matters anyhow. It’s what’s inside that counts.

Would you rather live in the Renaissance era Or 300 years in the future?

I honestly don’t think our planet will be here in 300 years and if it is, it will be ruled by Chinese Apes. I’ll go with the Renaissance Era.

Bust both of your kneecaps at the same time, Or Lose one eye and the opposite hand?

Kneecaps can heal and I’ve already gotten pretty good at using a wheelchair and prosthetics so let’s go with that.

Sleep in the cold with no blanket, Or sleep in the hot with all bundled up?

Probably in the hot and all wrapped up. It’s uncomfortable, but I already sleep kind of like that, wrapping myself in my blanket with only the top of my head and my foot sticking out, like a giant Burrito. I’d be all wet and sweaty, but that’s better than freezing.

And there you go. My thanks for reading. Comments, thoughts, and questions are welcome and appreciated. And if you want to throw one at me, force me to make a decision, go for it. I want to see what you come up with and make it good. Thank you. And with that, let’s wrap this up. Take care and be well, my friends. I’ll see you in the Middle Square.

Ubuntu!