Tossing Salt Wrestling Q&A

Tossing Salt Wrestling Q&A
March 29, 2014
Doug Maynard
 
Good morning.  As most of the regular readers, my dozen or so fans, are aware, when I write my two weekly columns, “Tossing Salt – Worldwide News” and “Wrestling Fact Or Fiction”, I always try and answer a few wrestling (or comic) related questions.  The huge majority of my questions for these columns, I get from two of my favorite Facebook wrestling groups, “Kult of Kayfabe” and “Jim Crockett Promotions… A Great Era In Pro Wrestling”.  And lately, I’ve had more people sending me questions to use through my e-mail and Facebook page too.  (Doug28352@yahoo.com / http://www.facebook.com/saltpalace)  So with that said, I’ve acquired quite a large backlog of questions to use.  And that’s why I’m writing this column today.
 
Yeppers, my friends.  It’s time to just go through and see how many questions I can get answered, so I can start fresh on Tuesday when I do the next edition of “Tossing Salt”.  I’m pulling an Eminem and just cleaning out my closet, if you will.  Hey, it’s either this or go to Wal-Mart with my family members.  And with those choices, it’s not even close. I hate Wal-Mart. It’s the most evil place on earth.  They have some damn good egg rolls in their deli and I love the cheap DVD selection, but still… they’re evil!  I worked there for a short while.  I know!  By the way, here’s a disclaimer. All the opinions expressed are mine and mine alone.  And now you know.
 
So let’s do this already.  It’s a super-sized, deluxe edition of what I generally call…
 
Question Time…
 
Adam Evenson:  Would Hogan be as popular is the IWC was around in his era?
 
Nope.  Part of what made Hulkamania and Hulk Hogan so big was the larger than life image fed to us by his character and the powers-that-be in the WWE.  They wanted us to think Hogan was larger than life and we didn’t have any way to really know any different.  Now, with the internet and the infamous IWC second-guessing everything and everyone, I think it’s nearly impossible for anyone to ever be as big as Hogan was.  The closest we have in today’s era is John Cena and he’s booed as often as he’s cheered.  The internet and the IWC have killed the mystery of pro wrestling and someone like Hulk Hogan is something that we shall never see again.
 
Aaron Pape:  Doing some research, I found out that Dean Ambrose was born and raised about 5 minutes from where I live in Cincinnati.  Who is the most recognized pro wrestler from your home town?
 
From my home-town itself, Laurinburg, NC, it would be Mike Youngblood (my ex-roommate), who has mainly worked in Puerto Rico and some WWF matches, as well as current Indy wrestling stars Ty Tyson and Dylan Kage.  But from nearby, it’s another story. Matt and Jeff Hardy are from Cameron, NC, about thirty miles up the road.  Tatanka is from Pembroke, NC, roughly twenty miles away.  And I’m sure if I thought long and hard about it, I’d think of many more since NC is a hotbed for wrestling talent.  Those are the main folks who come to mind immediately though.
 
Jeremy Cline:  Inter-gender matches, yes or no?
 
Yes.  While I’m not big on watching men abuse women and vice-versa, when booked correctly and used properly, men and women can oppose each other and have some good matches.  Remember Baby Doll versus Jim Cornette? How about Madusa versus Paul Heyman?  Or Chyna versus Chris Jericho?  It’s all in the quality of the worker, the purpose of the match and the context that they’re used, but there is a place for inter-gender matches and I have no objections about them.
 
Ricky Pruitt:  Will you watch Wrestlemania 30? Which match are you looking forward to the most?
 
Absolutely, I will be watching Wrestlemania XXX.  That’s the one show each year I do not miss.  And the match that I’m most excited for right now is the John Cena versus Bray Wyatt match.  Well, that and the Battle Royal because I’ve always loved Battle Royals.  
 
Larry Boone:  If you could sit down and have dinner with any three wrestling stars, past or present, who would it be?
 
Three stars, past or present?  Ole Anderson, Jim Cornette and Bobby Heenan.  And I could just sit back, listen and take in the knowledge and stories being told.
 
Jeff Green:  So… What is the worst combo of The Horsemen?
 
The combination of Ric, Arn and Paul Roma with Ole as the manager.  It was 3/4 a good team, but something didn’t quite fit.  Wonder what (who) that was?
 
Cory J. Wiatrek:  How would the Four Horsemen have done in the WWF?
 
If Vince had brought the Horsemen to the WWF as a unit, with Ric, Arn, Tully and Barry Windham, they would have done well at first, but it wouldn’t have lasted for long. Ric would have been fed to Hogan almost immediately,  Barry, Arn and Tully would have gotten a limited push as tag team wrestlers and in the mid-card, but just about the time that they’re getting over well and winning over the crowds, Vince would pull the plug since they’re not one of his creations and he wasn’t really known as a big fan of factions anyhow. They would do okay for a while, but before long, as Arn and Tully learned, I think the Horsemen would end up jumping ship and heading back down towards Atlanta.
 
Curtis Chordologist Tompkins:  The Powers of Pain, Barbarian and The Warlord – Were they Championship material or just Challengers?
 
In the ring, they were both big, strong and had a great presence.  But the problem is that neither Barbarian or Warlord were talkers. They had all the physical tools tobe champions, but without the proper manager to guide them and act as a spokesperson, the potential for success was very limited. So while I personally would have enjoyed seeing them get a title run, from a business sense and in all honesty, the most I could see them as is simply challengers.
 
Dan The-Plague Reborn:  In real life are you a babyface or heel?
 
In the real world, while I like to think I’m a bad guy and heel, I’m not.  I’m saracastic and bitchy sometimes, but I think that most of my friends and the people around me would say I’m definitely a baby-face 99% of the time.
 
Ryan Springer:  If you can be any wrestler, who would you be? What style would you use? What promotion would you start with? What is the promotion you wish you created?
 
Who would I be? I’d be using the name “Vincent Paul Phillips”, my alter-ego if you will and I’d be a power-guy with a more-or-less scientific style, but a bit on the rough side, aka The Anderson Brothers.  Considering my current age, I think I’d be starting off in Memphis and then moving on to the Carolinas and the Mid-Atlantic region with occasional trips to Florida and Georgia for extra bookings.  And the promotion I wish I could take credit for creating would be Jim Crockett Promotions, which of course, was the Mid-Atlantic region.  
 
Robert Leartowicz:  Your thoughts on Bad Bad Leroy Brown.
 
A big guy with a limited amount of ability, but made the best of what he had. Was decent on the mic and a solid mid-card player all around.  
 
Jason Johnson:  If you could interview any super-hero or super-villain, who would you pick??
 
Magneto.  From his life as a gypsy to the concentration camps, the “Nazi hunter” period, the battles against the X-Men and Avengers, the trial in front of the World Court and as Headmaster of Xaiver’s school, the time as leader of Genosha, to his current status… Magneto is such a complex character with so many levels, it would be an interview that would never be able to touch on everything.  He’s a villian, yet also a man of honor and nobility as well.  
 
Curtis Chordologist Tompkins:  The Great Kabuki.  This guy’s  gimmick scared me, but it only worked to a point.  Would it be a fair statement to say he was all bark / no bite?   He had a great manager in Gary Hart!
 
I agree that Gary Hart was a great manager. As for Kabuki, I’m not sure what to think about him.  I had the chance to see him wrestle live many times against Jimmy Valiant when I was younger and while I enjoyed the matches, I don’t recall being overly impressed. He had a great look and that thing he did with the mist was awesome, but aside from that, the actual matches were not all that.  So as much as I hate to, I have to agree with what you said.  He wasn’t a bad wrestler or bad performer, but the best part was the character and not the wrestler.  So all bark and no bite?  You’re right.
 
Curtis Chordologist Tompkins:  Paul Jones.  He called himself #1 but was he really !!
 
Paul Jones was a good wrestler and, despite his short stature, one of the top guys in the Mid-Atlantic and Florida regions for many, many years. And if he wants to say that he’s “#1”, who are we to disagree?
 
Dan The-Plague Reborn:  In your own personal opinion, what separates enhancement talent from a jobber?
 
The way I see it is this.  An enhancement talent is someone who is a good wrestler / performer in their own right who is capable of having good matches with almost anyone and is used to build, aka “enhance”  new talent and make them look like stars.  A “jobber” is someone who’s used to take up space and be used in squash matches where they have little to no offense and are mainly there just to be a body in the ring. Enhancement talents are guys who have the potential to be stars in their own right, but just haven’t quite made it there yet.  Jobbers don’t win, will never win, and are just there to take up space.
 
Chad Allen:  I feel that Eric Young, is the most underrated man in wrestling right now. Who do you feel deserves that tag?
 
The first name that popped into my head was Heath Slater.  He showed so much spark and potential when he first started in WWE, both as the “One Man Band” and in his partnership with Justin Gabriel, but now he’s just used as a loud-mouth jobber. Given the right story and push, I think Heath would be a big name and big star for the WWE. He has the talents necessary.  WWE just needs to wise up and use those skills and talents better.
 
Dustin Robert Petersen:  Correct me if I’m wrong but I dont think a ref has ever been inducted into the WWE Hall of Fame.  When Earl Hebner finishes up with TNA, do you think he deserves to be inducted and better yet, do you think he will be?
 
I don’t believe that a referee has been inducted either.  Earl Hebner does deserve a spot for his long history in pro wrestling, but I don’t think we’ll ever see that happen. Earl and his brother burned some bridges when they were fired from the WWE and moved to TNA and while some wounds heal, others don’t.  If Hebner was inducted, that would also open up another big can of worms. What about Dick Kroll?  Or Tommy Young?  Or Bill Alfonso?  Referees are often the forgotten third man in matches and when it comes to being in the Hall of Fame, I think they’ll stay forgotten there as well.
 
Joseph Bowden:  So Double J is launching a new promotion and it got me thinking, If you were starting a promotion, who would you hire?  Announcers, refs, commentary team, wrestlers, etc.
 
So I’ve got the money and a television deal to start my own promotion.  It wasn’t specified in the question, but I’m assuming that people from TNA and WWE, who are under contracts, are off limits.  That’s the way I’m going to work it anyhow.  First, I’d hire my head-booker / writer.  Several names come to mind for that role, but I think I’d go with tried and true and see if Jim Cornette is available.  Cornette and I could work together then to decide to who add and use for those roles.  
 
For the announcers, I think I’d want Scott Hudson, formerly of WCW fame and Disco Inferno as my commentary team.  I’d probably try and get Lisa Moretti (Ivory) as my backstage interviewer and The Honky Tonk Man as my other interviewer and part-time commentator. 
 
For the role of “Commissioner”, I’d like to get someone with a wrestling background and plenty of credibility for the role. How about former two-time AWA World Heavyweight Champion , the “Living Legend” Larry Zbyszko?
 
For referees, I’m not really sure who’s available out there, but I think that former WCW / WWE official Nick Patrick would be my pick for head referee if available. Brian Hebner would be another that I’d try to get if possible.
 
And then we have the wrestlers.  If he’s available and willing, CM Punk would be the first pick.  And with Punk, Colt Cabana and Ace Steele would be hired as well.  AJ Styles, Crimson and Matt Morgan would be my (former) TNA picks.  I’d reach out to Carlito, Chris Masters, Trevor Murdoch, Antonio Thomas, Rob Conway, Harry Smith, Chris Steele, Michael Youngblood  and Teddy Hart as well. Those fifteen would be my base for the male roster and I’d have each of them submit the names of two or three guys who we could also use to expand the roster.  As far as the women go, Lisa Marie Varon (Victoria) and Amazing Kong (Kharma) would be my top two women.  I’d also try and get Winter (from TNA) and Beth Phoenix.  Use those four women to build the women’s division of my company around, while also using their contacts and knowledge to find more recruits and ladies to work in my company.  
 
I’d also try to use managers for those people who don’t quite have the mic skills that I want or need that little extra something.  A man I know named Jaysn Kross would be great for this role.  So would  Chris Steele if he’s not wanting to wrestle a full schedule and the great Joey Nuggs would be welcome as well.
 
These people I’ve mentioned would set up the rootwork for my promotion and allow me to also reach out to other people as needed to help build my roster as well as determine the direction of my company.  
 
And there you go. I think that’s enough for today.  I’m getting tired anyhow, so this is where I’m closing this up and putting this baby to bed. Thank you for reading and if you have any questions you’d like to have me attempt to answer, just drop me a line at Doug28352@yahoo.com or else contact me via my Facebook page.  The address is above.  I’m Doug and I am out of here.  I’ll be back on Tuesday with the RAW recap and a new edition of “Tossing Salt – Worldwide News”.  Have a great weekend.
 
Ubuntu!
 
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“D” Survey

Survey

Rules: It’s harder than it looks! Copy to your own note, erase my answers, enter yours, and tag twenty people. Use the first letter of your name to answer each of the following questions. They have to be real…nothing made up! If the person before you had the same first initial, you must use different answers. You cannot use any word twice and you can’t use your name for the boy/girl name question.

1. What is your name?: Doug
2. A four letter word: Dork
3. A boy’s name: Dave
4. A girl’s name: Denise
5. An occupation: Doctor
6. A color : Dandelion Yellow
7. Something you wear: diapers
9. A food: Dip
10. Something found in the bathroom: Dental Floss
11. A place: Dairy Queen
12. A reason for being late: Disgusted
13. Something you’d shout: (in best Ron Simmons voice) “DAMN!”
15. Something you drink: Dr. Pepper
16. A musical group: Devo
17. An animal: Duck
18. A street name: Daniels Bvld.
19. A type of car: Dodge
20. The title of a song: Dead Babies (Alice Cooper)

 

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Wrestling Fact Or Fiction: March 27, 2014

Tossing Salt Presents:  Wrestling Fact Or Fiction
March 27, 2014
Doug Maynard
 
What up, my Peeps?  It’s time to do that Thursday “Fact or Fiction” thing that I do each week. It’s one of your favorite guilty pleasures, along with watching the old Saturday morning cartoons late at night on the tv and eating leftover chinese food while laying on your couch in your boxers.  Yeah, you know you love it.  And I like doing it, so we’re both happy.  I’m Doug and this is what I do.  But enough of the chit-chat.  Let’s get to work.
 
Thoughts…
 
Was watching Starcade 85 earlier tonight on the WWE Network.  A good show, but I have to ask.  Ron Garvin in drag as “Miss Atlanta Lively”?  What the hell were they thinking?  Garvin WAS NOT an attractive drag queen.
 
But then again, John Cena once portrayed a character called “Juan Cena” so I guess that everyone has their weak moments.
 
Also watched Bash At The Beach 2000 and Lt. Loco (Chavo Jr.) versus Juventud Guerrero.  Those guys were (are) amazing workers and it was a fantastic match. And as much as I love my other-half, if “The Juice” ever becomes available, I’m ready, willing and able.  Same goes for Lisa Moretti (Ivory).  Just saying.
 
You know what would be great.  The Shield versus The Wyatts versus The Real Americans versus 3MB in a Fatal 4-Way Tag Match.  
 
Ralphus needs to be inducted into the WWE Hall of Fame.
 
I wonder if Batista regrets his decision to come back to the WWE, based on how his currrent run has gone thus far?  I also wonder if he’s bought any new jeans?
 
WE THE PEOPLE!  ‘Nuff said!
 
Remember the “Brawl For All” matches?  Bart Gunn should have become a major star after his win.  Instead he ended up getting squashed by Butterbean.  What the hell was the WWE thinking?  Talk about lost potential and money left on the table.  Oh vey!
 
Let’s answer a few questions from the old T.S. mailbag…
 
Question Time…
 
Jackson Howlette:  What past title would you like to see come back in the WWE?
 
My personal choice would be the WCW, or I guess it would be WWE now, World Television Championship.  It would be a great way to build up talent and showcase some great matches for the men who are not quite ready to be in the WWE World Championship picture, but have skills and would benefit from the rub.  With the TV title, you would have a top mid-card talent making defenses on RAW, Smackdown and Main Event.  Just throw a stipulation in there like a ten or fifteen minute time limit and then you have a place for the talents to just have great matches.  The time limit means that no one has to win or lose and it would really get over, I do believe.  It gives the WWE a reason to have a tournament, comparable to the King of the Ring event, which are always fun, and give various superstars trial runs as a champion to see how well they can get over.  It’s a win-win title for a company like the WWE and should be looked into as a possibility.  At least that’s what I think.
 
Erik Knueppel:  If Ric or Arn came back to manage a new Four Horsemen, who would you put in it? 
 
The legacy of the Four Horsemen is something that should not be tampered with and left alone.  But, with that being said, if Vince pulled Arn and Ric into his office and said that he wanted a new group of Horsemen, it could very well happen.  I’d have Arn as the manager because Ric is, well he’s Ric Flair and just by being the “Nature Boy”, he would have a strong presence and could over-shadow the potential Horsemen.  Arn is respected and a great talker, but he would know more when to step to the back and let the others shine, much like J.J. Dillon used to do.
 
As for the wrestlers, I’ll stick with the current WWE roster.  There are quite a few guys out there that I’d love to bring in, such as Mark Jindrak from down in Mexico’s Triple AAA, former WWE stars Carlito and Chris Masters and former TNA stars Matt Morgan and Crimson, but I’m assuming that Vince would tell Arn and Ric to look at the current rosters of the WWE and NXT first before going outside the company.  
 
For the Ric Flair “top dog” role, I think I’d go with Dolph Ziggler. For the “Enforcer” role, made famous by Arn Anderson, I’d be looking at Cesaro.  For the part of the technician / trouble-maker, ala Tully Blanchard, I think that The Miz would be a good choice.  And for the mentor / veteran spot, aka Ole Anderson, I think that Mark Henry would fit.  
 
So we’d have Dolph, Miz, Cesaro and Mark Henry, managed by Double-A, Arn Anderson.  It’s not quite up to the Horseman standards, but it’d be a good start.  Everyone has the talent and skills necessary to be part of an elite grouping and if booked correctly, maybe the WWE would be able to catch lightning in a bottle.  Who knows?  
 
And just for the heck of it, if I was told to create my new “Horsemen” from anyone in wrestling, it would be the guys I mentioned earlier.  Mark Jindrak, Carlito, Chris Masters, Matt Morgan and Crimson, managed by Arn Anderson.  And that group would come in with an impact, kick ass and be a major force to be contended with.  Just sayng.
 
Stuart Oggy Hodkinson:  Would Trish Stratus have been as highly rated if she was around today?
 
I really don’t think so.  Trish was an avid student of the game and worked hard while coming up in the WWE to become a good worker and earn her spot in the company, but a lot of the credit for her rise has to go to the other women who she worked with every night, such as Lita, Molly, Jazz, Ivory, Luna, Victoria, etc.  Trish worked hard with other women who also worked hard and as a result, she got better and better.  Being around others with talent and drive tends to bring out the best in people and in that locker room, everyone was competing to be the best and get that spot on the shows.  Trish thrived and did well.  The locker room isn’t as talented now in the ring and it’s a whole different world for the Divas.  Trish, if she was there today, would rise to the top of the Divas division.  Of that, I have no doubt, but would she be as skilled in the ring or be as highly rated? I doubt it.  Trish was a product of her time and era and sadly, that time and that place and moment doesn’t exist anymore.
 
And now…
 
Wrestling Fact Or Fiction…
 
As per the usual, the questions and statements below come from my friends at 411mania.com/wrestling.  Well, most of them do anyhow. The others are from me.  And the answers.  That’s all me, as it should be.  Let’s do this.
 
1. The build to the Undertaker vs. Brock Lesnar match at WrestleMania has been under whelming.
 
FACT:  Paul Heyman has done a great job with the promos and helping to build the anticipation for the Undertaker / Lesnar match, but aside from that, it really hasn’t been all that impressive.  The original “contract signing” was great and then…  eh!  Undertaker threatens Heyman on the Main Event program and we get the Druid / casket mumbo-jumbo on RAW.  It hasn’t been bad really, but it hasn’t been great either.  Honestly though, I think that could be said for the entire build for Wrestlemania XXX.  We’ve had some good moments, but it seems that, aside from the HHH / Bryan match, the build and promotion for Wrestlemania is all over the place. With the launch of The Network, the new Scooby Doo movies, the CM Punk situation, etc, maybe there are just too many things happening at once. For the die hard fans, what they’ve done is enough, but for the casual fans still on the edge, it isn’t really.
 
2. The return of the Beautiful People is a positive for the TNA Knockouts Division.
 
FACT:  Having Angelina Love return is a good sign for the Knockouts Division.  Will TNA be able to capitalize and take advantage?  It’s TNA so I doubt it.  It’s still a good move though.
 
3. Roman Reigns will not be the break out star of the Shield.
 
FACT:  I have no doubt that Roman will be a big star and have a great career, but the more I see him and watch him perform, I have a feeling that Dean Ambrose will be the first one to really get over as a singles guy and make the biggest impact.  All three men are fantastic and will do very well in their careers and have break-out moments, but my gut says Ambrose will be “the man” to do it first.
 
4. Kurt Angle is more likely to leave TNA for Jeff Jarrett’s promotion than return to WWE.
 
FACT:  While I think Kurt would probably rather go to the WWE and finish his in-ring career there, I think he also realizes that it’s not the same as it was when he was first there.  His body is in rough shape and no one is even sure if he could pass the physicals to be allowed in a WWE ring as a wrestler.  Then add the stress of the WWE road schedule and the “Wellness policies”.  It all might be a little too much for the Olympic Gold Medalist.  And also, in WWE, Kurt would be a big fish in an ocean of big fish.  All of that has to be considered.  With Jarrett, it’s obvious that they respect each other and can work together, despite their unique personal relationship with Jeff being married to Kurt’s ex-wife Karen.  And Kurt would be the “big fish” there and not just another pretty face.  I’m sure that when Kurt retires, he’ll try his best to find a way to finish up in a WWE ring.  But Kurt isn’t ready to retire yet and for the moment, working for Jarrett is probably the best way to go.
 
5. Bret Hart is right: Triple H is a “4 out of 10” wrestler.
 
FICTION: I’m not really a big HHH fan, but Bret is letting his personal bias cloud his judgement.  HHH isn’t perfect, but on anyone’s scale, he would be closer to the higher end than the lower, probably around the “8” or “8.5” level.  I respect Bret, but he’s wrong here.
 
6. You would watch Blackman’s Bounties on the WWE Network.
 
FICTION:  Unless he’s got Al Snow as his partner, I have no desire to see Steve Blackman in any kind of show. Just saying.
 
7. Razor Ramon deserves a spot in the WWE Hall of Fame.
 
FACT:  I almost said fiction because as a stand-alone character, Razor Ramon, while good, is simply a gold nugget in the middle of a gold mine.  But Razor Ramon is more than just the WWE “Bad Guy”.  It’s Scott Hall, former AWA World Tag Team Champion.  It’s Scott Hall, one of the original members of the nWo, along with Nash and Hogan.  It’s Scott Hall, one half of “The Outsiders”.  And Scott Hall, despite his failings and bad moments, has made a significant impact in this business and deserves every honor and tribute he can get.  Razor Ramon is just a piece of the puzzle – Scott Hall is the whole picture.  And survey says, one more for the bad guy!.
 
8. Wrestlemania XXX will be one of the best Wrestlemanias of all time.
 
FICTION:  It will be good and have some great moments to be sure, but so far, based on the build and what we’re getting in terms of matches and promotion, it seems more like a chaotic mess than the biggest show of the last thirty years.  It’s been underwhelming, to say the least and it just doesn’t seem to have any focus yet.  Maybe they’ll put it all together and surprise me, but so far, it’s not looking very good.
 
9.  Jonathan Coachman will be returning to the WWE.
 
FICTION:  We’ve all heard the news that Coach has an announcement of some sorts regarding the WWE, but will it be the WWE moving to ESPN?  I doubt it. And will it be Coach returning to the WWE?  I doubt that too. Give up that nice job with ESPN?  I can’t see it happening. It’s probably an interview of some sorts or maybe the addition of Mike Adamle to the ESPN family.  Who knows, but I really don’t expect it to be anything truly major, except in the eyes of Coach.
 
10. Sting will make his WWE debut at Wrestlemania XXX.
 
FICTION:  While we may see clues and hints of The Stinger at Wrestlemania XXX, I don’t expect we’ll see the actual man himself until the next night at RAW.  Sting isn’t the type to step in and steal someone else’s spotlight and moment at the WWE’s biggest show and if he was to debut at Wrestlemania, it would do exactly that and over-shadow the majority of the event. Or worse, be a big moment in a day of big moments and not have much of an effect or stand-out for what the WWE wants to do with his character.  Better to wait and have him do his thing on RAW the next night where it can mean more and truly be an impact moment rather than just another highlight in a day filled with highlights.
 
And with that, I think it’s time to bring this baby to a close. Questions and comments can be sent to Doug28352@yahoo.com or else you can come find me on Facebook at facebook.com/saltpalace.  Thank you for reading.  I’m Doug and I am out of here, my friends. Have a great week and I’ll catch you on the flip-side.  
 
Ubuntu!
 
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Tossing Salt – Worldwide News: March 26, 2014

Tossing Salt – Worldwide News
March 26, 2014
Doug Maynard
 
Greetings, salutations and how the hell are you, my friends.  I’m Doug and this is pro wrestling’s most eclectic column, always infamous, the one and only “Tossing Salt – Worldwide News”.  As you may or may not have noticed, today is Wednesday which means I’m running a day behind.  No excuses except for inept slackness on my part, but I’m here now to get the party started and get things right. So let’s do this, shall we?
 
Thoughts…
 
Word is that Trish Stratus will be inducting Lita into the WWE Hall of Fame.  Good call, but I want kind of wanting to see Matt Hardy and Edge have the honors.  
 
What’s up with the “Razor Ramon” tag for Scott Hall and his induction announcement?  I understand copyright and all of that, but “Razor” had a great career before the WWE in the AWA and after the WWE in WCW, and both companies and their histories are part of the WWE Universe now.  “Razor” is Scott Hall and he deserves the recognition and honor. I just don’t get that whole “name” thing.
 
Tony Schiavone was spotted at WWE Headquarters. I’d like to see Tony brought in and used on the Network.  He used to be a great announcer and probably could be again.  I hope that Scott Hudson and Bob Caudle are brought in at some point too.  Shame to have that talent just wasting away and not being called upon to help with the NWA / WCW projects.
 
Nobody is talking or thinking about CM Punk anymore.  That just makes me more sure than ever that by SummerSlam at the latest, he’ll be back.  Punk versus Daniel Bryan for the WWE World Championship as the main event of Wrestlemania 31?  I could see it.
 
I finally broke down and got the WWE Network.  I’m happy.
 
I still want to see Disco Inferno as part of Wrestlemania XXX.  No, I’m not going to shut up or give up on that idea.  Fandango was quoted on RAW as saying that he “hates disco”.  If that isn’t an opening to bring in Disco Inferno for a short run, I don’t know what is.  Book it, Vince.
 
I love old-school wrestling and old-school wrestling fans.  Big shout out to the fans and folks at ACW (American Championship Wrestling).  Isn’t it about time for a Laurinburg show again?  
 
William Regal belongs on the main WWE roster not only wrestling, but doing the commentary with Cole and JBL.  No offense to Lawler, but a few months calling the action at NXT would be good for him (and us). And Regal is better at this point and time.
 
The Undertaker needs to lay off a little bit with the mascara. 
 
Did you see that bump that Brock took, head first, on the casket at RAW?  That was scary, but he seemed to shake it off and be okay.  It’d be a shame if he was injured and had to miss Wrestlemania and the match against Taker.  Yeah, I’m actually interested in seeing that match now. Paul Heyman has done his job well.
 
Batista’s pants split as he speared Randy Orton on RAW on Monday night. Have to love “Live TV” and if that wasn’t a sign that this whole Batista run for the gold is a mistake, I don’t know what it.  
 
Nobody throws out a slap like Stephanie McMahon.
 
Let’s move on…
 
Monday Night RAW (in 500 Words or Less)
 
A look at last week as HHH takes out Daniel Bryan and The “Yes!” movement.  Here is Stephanie.  She loves her some HHH.  Here is Randy Orton.  He’s keeping his title at WM XXX.  Here is Batista.  He’s going to beat everyone and win title. Insult to Steph.  Steph with the slap.  Spear by Batista to Orton and Dave’s pants split.  Gotta love live TV. Christian wins a Fatal-4Way over Dolph, Del Rio and Sheamus. He’s fighting Big E on Tuesday night for the IC title.  The Wyatts speak.  Awesome as always.  Sin Cara has Scooby Doo in his corner (yes, I said Scooby Doo) as he squashes Damien Sandow.  How the mighty have fallen.  We look back at Smackdown as Kane has his friends and associates set up The Shield so that he and the New Age Outlaws can destroy them.  Los Matadores defeated Rybaxel when The Shield provided a distraction.  The Shield destroyed Rybaxel. Believe in The Shield.  And payback is a bitch.  HHH talks to Michael Cole and this is now the “Reality Era”.  HHH says he’s going to end Daniel Bryan, The “Yes!” movement and win WWE title at Wrestlemania XXX.  Cody Rhodes defeated Fandango after Summer badly faked an injury and Fandango was distracted.  Goldust likes to dance.  Movie plug for “Sabotage” and stars Arnold and Paul.  Hulk Hogan is here too.  Here comes The Miz.  He gets punked.  Love live The Terminator and Hulkamania, brutha!  Big Show squashes Titus O’Neil.  What’s the point?  Cena is looking in the mirror and is jumpy.  The Shield talk to The Authority.  No hard feelings and they’ll talk later.  It’s The Shield versus Real Americans later in the night.  Super-Cena and Luke Harper have a fantastic match that ends when the lights go out.  We see Cena tied in the ropes and wearing the goat mask.  Follow The Buzzards.  AJ Lee walks away from a match with Naomi.  EXCUSE ME!  Vickie Guerrero makes an Invitational Challenge for Wrestlemania where AJ is facing essentially the entire WWE Diva Roster for her title.  Ouch!  Razor Ramon is going into the WWE Hall of Fame.  I call him Scott Hall.  Really good match as The Real Americans learn to believe in The Shield.  Cesaro eats announce table.  WE THE PEOPLE! (but the Shield still wins.)  Paul Heyman and Brock Lesnar are here. They call out The Undertaker, but get Druids carrying a coffin to the ring. Brock looks inside, but no Taker.  Paul and Brock are frustrated.  The casket open and we get vintage Taker.  Taker and Brock fight.  Brock flees to fight another day (in two weeks at Wrestlemania XXX).  The end.  And that’s how to recap Monday Night RAW.
 
And moving on to those immortal words of everyone.  It must be that thing we call…
 
Quotable Quotes Part I…
 
I don’t drink. I don’t smoke. I don’t do drugs. My addiction is wrestling.’ – CM Punk
 
‘Showing off is what you do when your are simply better than everybody else.’ – Dolph Ziggler 
 
‘If Mr.McMahon dies, do you think the mourners will outnumber the cheering section?’ – Jerry “The King” Lawler 
 
‘If Shakespeare was alive today, he’d be writing wrestling shows.’ – Chris Jericho
 
And now, it’s time to check that old mailbag and a few questions from the wonderful world of Facebook.  
 
Question Time…
 
Juan Orlando Pabon:  Who’s your favorite manager/wrestler team of all time??
 
Managers come and go and most managers, especially in wrestling tend to switch clients like the rest of us switch underwear or socks or like Sunny switches bed partners, but occasionally, you’ll find that one manager and one person or team that are together through thick and thin and where you see one, you’ll see the other.  And while some names come to mind like Paul Ellering and The Road Warriors, Bobby Heenan and Nick Bockwinkle, Jimmy Hart and Hulk Hogan, etc.  My favorite and the one I’ve always liked the best has to be Jim Cornette and The Midnight Express.  A great tag team with a great talker – the perfect combination.  They go together like peanut butter and jelly, or good chili and trips to the bathroom.  It just doesn’t get much better in my eyes.
 
Mike Martin:  Top Five Guys who Never Got a WWF/E Title Run But Should Have!
 
Larry Zbyszko – Right after the Bruno / Zbyszko wars in 1981, there was no hotter heel in the WWF than Zbyszko and he was the perfect person to take the WWF title from Bob Backlund and bring in the fans.  Promoters Vince Sr. and Vince Jr. didn’t agree and Zbyszko ended up going to Georgia and the AWA instead.  Talk about money lost – it was that day.
 
Ted DiBiase – Forget about the whole “buying the title from Andre” stuff.  If ever a wrestler was on fire and deserving of a title run in his own right, the “Million Dollar Man” was it.  A great wrestler, a great talker, and the fans hated him.  The money he and Hogan could have made.  They did a good run, but a title switch would have been even so much better.
 
Roddy Piper – Piper was so hot in his early WWF days that it can be argued that he didn’t “need the title”, and I agree.  But it would have been nice to see Piper get a brief run and watch Hogan try to get it back.  Piper didn’t need the belt, but he did deserve it.
 
Greg Valentine – There was an angle in the WWF in the early 80’s where Valentine and Bob Backlund wrestled and the ending had controversy and Valentine was declared the winner even though Backlund won. The belt was “held up” until they had a rematch a month later at Madison Square Garden.  It was a great angle for the time and gave great heat to both men and their feud.  But imagine the heat if Valentine won the rematch and became the WWF Champion?  It would have been a short run because Greg is not really the flashiest or most charismatic guy in the business, but he’s solid and capable and people respect (and fear) him.  And he would have been a breath of fresh air for all of the non-Backlund fans in the WWF, of which there was many. It’s money left on the table and not, in my mind, the best decision of Vince Sr. to book  things as they happen.  Greg deserved better.
 
Matt Hardy – I know I’ll get some heat for this, but Matt was, until the crap went down with Edge and Lita, a good talent and the right person at the right time in the WWE. He was hot and on fire and even though he did get runs with the United States and ECW titles, a brief run with the WWE title would have been the right thing to do. If Edge can be justified as a billion-time champion for the company, why not Matt?  Just saying.
 
Jacob Ray Santos:  Name a wrestler that you would want to actually wrestle in the ring. I’m going with Kurt Angle. He is one of the purest wrestlers in the game and it would be an honor to have a match with him.
 
Ric Flair, because he’s one of the best of all time, he’s a true legend, and he’d make me look like a milllion bucks and a major star even though I have less wrestling ability than the average broomstick or most WWE Divas on the first day of wrestling school.  
 
Jeremy Rinehart:  Which wrestler was your guilty pleasure? He may not have been good on the mic or even in the ring, but you liked him.
 
I think that anyone who reads my RAW recaps or any of my material can easily answer this one.  He’s the former WCW TV Champion and the man who always says that, “It’s your duty to shake your booty!”.  All together now kids… The Disco Inferno.  
 
Steve Schaffer:  If you could turn a skeptic on to wrestling during the Jim Crockett years, what feud or match would you go with? 
 
Just have the fans take a look at any match with Wahoo McDaniel fighting Ric Flair and they’ll end up saying “I know wrestling is fake, but that shit right there is real!”.  For the beauty and science of wrestling and matches that you can’t help get involved in, whether you like it or not, would be The Midnight Express versus The Rock & Roll Express.  Yeah, I think Wahoo versus Flair and then The Rock & Rollers versus The Midnights.  Watching those feuds would convert even the biggest skeptics.
 
Mario Pellot: If given the chance,name a wrestler you would kick right in the baby maker lol.
 
In other words, what wrestler is so annoying, so disgusting, so whatever that I would just like to see gone forever and have no respect for in any way, shape or form.  A few names come to mind of people I don’t like, but in general, I have a lot of respect for any man or woman who steps in that ring and follows their dreams, so I wouldn’t attempt bodily harm or anything more than a dirty look at most of them.  But I have no respect for anyone who hurts children and thus, my pick would be Buck “Rock & Roll” Zumhofe.  I respect what he did in the ring, but as recent news items have revealed, he’s not worthy of any kind of respect on a real, human basis.  He’s one guy I would have no hesistation to “kick in the baby maker”… repeatedly.  
 
And now, time for some more words of wisdom from those great minds we all know and love…
 
Quotable Quotes Part II…
 
“Paul Heyman could shit a better wrestling format in his sleep than Vince Russo and Ed Ferrara could do if they worked on it for twenty years.’ – Jim Cornette
 
‘Picking out Vince Russo’s faults could be a full-time job for somebody.’ – Jim Cornette
 
‘I spent my life – all my life – learning to wrestle. It’s the only means of livelihood I’ve ever had and, uh, the only gimmick that I have in wrestling is wrestling.’ – Lou Thesz
 
‘We’re the greatest athletes in the world without a doubt.’ – Hulk Hogan
 
‘No great success comes without risk.’ – Dixie Carter
 
And finally, let’s do that thing where I describe a person and you guess who.  I think we call it…
 
Who Am I?
 
Last week, I asked you this.  
 
I wrestled for thirty years, starting off in California and Texas, eventually moving to the Georgia area and the Carolinas, but am probably known for my attempts to start a wrestling union than my in-ring activities.  I’m also known for my mouth and promo ability, which was a running, shuck-jive style that was quickly “stolen” by guys like Dusty Rhodes.  I am also famous for my claims that I was constantly being held back by promoters due to racism and being blacklisted and even went on some talk shows to air my dirty laundry in public.  I did manage to hold several titles in my career, including my last belt, a tag team title in the Georgia territory, where my then-partner used our tag team break-up as the basis to turn heel and begin to work with his “family”, which in turn eventually led to the forming of an extremely well known faction.  My last match was on a pay-per-view in 1993 as part of a “Legends Match”.  Who Am I?
 
And the answer was none other than Claude Patterson, better known as Thunderbolt Patterson.  Patterson was infamous for his cries to unionize pro wrestling, even back as early as the mid-seventies.  He had an appearance on the “Morton Downey Jr. Show” where he made many claims about how he was blacklisted in pro wrestling and about racism behind the scenes.  His last major title was the Georgia National Tag Team Championship along with Ole Anderson and Ole used their loss and the break-up of the team, along with the arrival of Arn Anderson into the area to act as a reason to turn heel and join Arn in a tag team partnership, which would eventually lead to Ole and Arn becoming part of the original Four Horsemen.  Thunderbolt’s last match was at Slamboree 93 where he teamed with Brad Armstrong to defeat Ivan Koloff and Baron Von Raschke.
 
Correctly answering were:  My former tag team partner, Mr. Russell Jackson, “The Boss” Bob Magee, “Bama Boy” Chad Burttram, A man we know only as “Joey”, and “The Icon” Ryan Springer.  Great job, my friends.  Well done indeed.  And now, for a newbie.
 
I began wrestling in the 1960’s in my native Canada and gained early success as a masked man who was determined to “keep wrestling scientific”, but that ended when I was unmasked by the legendary Sheik.  Eventually, I moved to the Carolinas where I was briefly managed by the original Nature Boy Buddy Rogers and had success as both a singles and tag team wrestler, winning all of the regional titles at some point and also carrying the Canadian Championship as well.  I also had some success in the Central States region, but then I moved to the Mid-South region and totally changed my gimmick and character and never looked back.  I went from the well-respected and extremely scientific grappler to a wild and demented man with a partially shaved head, face paint and a crazy, far-away look in my eyes as I destroyed my opponents.  I had a high-profile run in the WWF, but best moments were probably in the Mid-South region and World Class territories.  I’ve been managed by such names as Bobby Heenan, Jimmy Hart, Sunshine, Dark Journey and Percy Pringle. My picture was featured in Sports Illustrated in a 1985 article about professional wrestling.  I retired in the late 1990’s, but came back to wrestling in 2004.  My last match was in 2007.  I wrote a book in 2006.  Who Am I?
 
Think you know the answer? Talk to me at Doug28352@yahoo.com or else inbox me at Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/saltpalace.  Add me.  
 
And I guess with that, I’m going to close this bad mama-jama up. It’s nearly 6:00am and my eyelids are getting very heavy.  Thank you for reading and I’ll be back tomorrow with that “Wrestling Fact Or Fiction” column that I do sometimes.  And I may have an all question column up this weekend too.  No promises, but as of now, it’s what I have planned so keep an eye out, okay?  Have a great day and I’ll catch you on the flip side.  Take it sleazy.
 
Ubuntu!
 
Image

Tossing Salt RAW Recap – March 24, 2014

Tossing Salt Presents:  Monday Night Raw Recap
March 24, 2014
Doug Maynard
 
It’s Monday night and it’s time to do that rambling RAW recap thing.  What I like to do is not necessarily recap move for move or match for match.  You can go plenty of places to see that.  Instead, I write about what’s happening on my TV screen and just whatever pops into my head as the show progresses.  It’s usually wrestling related, but no promises.  And I’m have to use the DVR and catch a replay tonight to do this.  Spent the earlier part of the night with my 2-year old nephew, Kayden.  I wanted to watch RAW.  He wanted to watch Nick Jr.  I pouted. He pouted more.  We watched Nick Jr.  I am so happy I had the DVR set here at the dark, deep and dusty offices of Tossing Salt Media, Inc.  What the hell is a “Bubble Guppie” anyhow?  And “Peppa Pig”?  Oh vey… if I didn’t love that kid…
 
Okay, time to get all RAW.  Not sure where they are, but does it really matter?  We’re two weeks away from Wrestlemania XXX and still no word if Disco Inferno and Alex Wright, The Boogie Knights will be there.  Come on now – a dance off between Disco and Fandango.  It has to happen.  Please!!  We start off with a recap of last week as HHH plays the game with Steph and they beat the holy hell out of Daniel Bryan.  It went on a bit long… well, way too long actually, but it did it’s job and made the anticipation for the HHH / Bryan match at Wrestlemania XXX much stronger.  “Not even real cops”…. that cracked me up.
 
Here comes Steph.  Why does she always wear black?  Johnny Cash, she’s not.  She’s one of the “principal owners” now.  I guess the Steph versus Vince battle to be the boss of everything and everyone is off… for now.  Daniel Bryan is not here, but they had to send a message that insubordination is not to be tolerated.  Steph is laying it on thick tonight with the power-trip speech.  She loves her some HHH too.  She says he’s going to be the next WWE World Champion.  And here comes Randy Orton.  He’s not here to argue, but if HHH makes it to the main event, he can’t be responsible for what he has to do to HHH when he beats HHH and Batista to a pulp. HHH needs to walk away from the title match.  And now we get Batista.  It’s all driving Batista crazy. He says he’ll be the next champ.  He doesn’t care who it is.  Batista is having mic problems.  Good – he can’t talk anyhow.  HHH has never beaten Batista.  Dave calls Randy a suck-up.  Dave with the burn on Steph.  She’s been drooled on a lot.  She slaps the glasses off his face.  Randy laughs.  And Batista splits the jeans when he spears Randy.  Gotta love this live TV.  Later tonight, Cole talks to HHH.  And the Scooby Doo plugs have started.  John Cena is taking on Luke Harper later tonight.  And Hogan and friends are here too.  So is Undertaker and Brock.  A jacked show for later.  I just want to see Steph slap Batista again.  I heard she hits like a girl, but damn if that wasn’t impressive.  If we can’t see Steph go all slappy again, how about Kwee Wee.  That might be fun too.
 
Del Rio and Christian are in the ring.  We get a 4-Way match to find someone to fight Big E.  Dolph Ziggler and Sheamus are the other two guys.  The winner goes after Big E on the Main Event tomorrow night on The Network.  I hope Christian wins.  It’s no count-outs or no disqualifications.  Should make for a good match.  I would love to see Del Rio and Christian as a tag team.  They would work well together. I’ll bet Del Rio is a Peep.  JBL is right about Big E on commentary. So long as he doesn’t speak, he’s great.  Big E reminds me of “Big Cat” Curtis Hughes.  I watched him (Hughes) on a WCW pay-per-view this morning.  Gotta love The Network.  Also watched The State Patrol. Guess it’s not all good.  Did you know that Terry Taylor and Greg Valentine were once the U.S. Tag Team Champs?  I had forgotten all about that, but now I remember.  Did I say that so far, I’m loving The Network?  Well, I am. Sheamus versus Christian in a match would make good pre-show filler for Wrestlemania. They have great chemistry.  Christian and William Regal would make a great team too.  I hate Sheamus’s clotheslines.  They look kind of sad.  Dolph’s X-Factor on Sheamus from the top was great… or as Joey Styles would say, “OH MY GOD!”.  This is a good match.  Christan wins.  He fights Big E tomorrow night on the Main Event for the IC title.  Christian as the IC champ going into  Wrestlemania XXX?  I like that idea.
 
It’s The Wyatt’s.  Bray sings and cuts another amazing promo.  He wants to know if John Cena has even seen him for what he is.  Mind games.  “Shades of Kevin Sullivan” – there’s a new Gamemaster in town.  Did you know that the WWE has their own Network?  I’m glad they remind us every two minutes or I may have forgotten.  Two weeks until Wrestlemania XXX.  I guess we won’t be seeing Goldberg versus Ryback.  Too bad.  Bray reminds me of the Bubble Guppies.  That show is stuck in my head.  Shoot me now!
 
Scooby Doo, Where are you?  In the movies, and at Wrestlemania XXX too.  Maybe he can have a “Scooby Snack Match” against the Dog-faced Gremlin, Rick Steiner.  I don’t want to see this. Sin Cara and Scooby Doo are both here and coming to the ring.  I’d rather see Robocop or Chucky.  Damien Sandow versus Sin Cara w/ Scooby Doo.  Cara flies around and Sandow just bumps.  This match sucks. The fans don’t seem too into it either.  Cara wins in a glorified squash.  That was very forgettable.
 
We go to tape from Smackdown where Kane has The Real Americans, Rybaxel and 3MB go after The Shield in a major beat-down before setting them up for a New Age Attack by Road Dogg, Billy Gunn and Kane himself.  Someone doesn’t believe in The Shield.  I do though.  I also believe in magic, karma, love at first sight and life on other planets.  And Muppets – can’t forget the Muppets.  
 
Los Matadores versus Ryback and Curtis Axel.  Axel is a good talent. He’s not “perfect” yet, but close.  The Shield is here.  Los Matadores with a quick pin after the distraction.  The Shield surrounds the ring. Attack and Axel gets planted outside the ring.  Spear by Reigns and he gets the Trifecta Power-bomb.  It’s all about The Shield.  Axel and Ryback just got their asses beat.  Payback is a bitch.  Hogan and Arnold are here.  HHH is talking next. Time to play the game.  I like Monoploy.  Uno is good too.  When I say “U”, you say “no”…. Nah, it’s just not the same.  I guess I’ll stick with Spades.  Shout out to Larry Wayne, Chad, Chris, Carl and Carson.  Stoney Crew Forever!
 
April 5th, we get the WWE HOF Ceremony. So far, it’s Ultimate Warrior, Jake Roberts, Lita, Carlos Colon, Mr. T, Paul Bearer and a rumored Bad Guy.  Guess we’ll get the confirmation later tonight.  Here comes HHH to talk to Michael Cole.  Where is Mean Gene when you need him?  Or Missy Hyatt?  Another replay of the Daniel Bryan beat-down from last week on RAW by HHH.  HHH blames Bryan and the “Occupy RAW” folks forced his hand and made him do what he had to do.  HHH is full of excuses and says that Bryan got what he deserved and asked for.  He calls the fans apathetic.  I wonder how many people had to go get a dictionary for that word?  HHH is ready to start “The Reality Era”. At Wrestlemania, HHH ends Bryan, the “Yes Movement” and becomes the WWE World Champion.  He has the power and no one can stop him.  I was hoping that Batista would come out and spear HHH when he stopped on the ramp to button his jacket. That would have been cool.  And Batista sucks, but I still would have marked out. I wish I had an eggroll. I’m hungry.
 
Last week, Goldust beat Fandango. And now, it’s Fandango again.  And Goldust again.  And Cody. Okay, it’s Cody versus Fandango.  Makes sense, I guess.  Fandango despises Disco. If that isn’t a call for a Disco Inferno versus Fandango match, I don’t know what is. Come on now Vince, make it happen.  This match is okay, but I’m having trouble getting into it. Would love to see Goldust “accidentialy” cost his bro the match.  Then we could get Cody versus Goldust at WM XXX.  Dustin’s dancing at ringside and antics with Summer are hilarious.  Summer goes down and Fandango is distracted.  Cody wins.  
 
We look at the movie “Sabotage”.  I don’t care.  Go watch “Red State” on Netflix instead.  Arnold looks old.  Hell, he is old.  Arnold, Joe and Hulk Hogan are coming up next.  Hey, I hear that the WWE and Scooby Doo have a new movie / DVD coming out. Go watch that instead. Arnold said he’d be back and he is. I just don’t care.  Or “Bad Words”. Just saw the commerical for that.  Now that’s entertainment. I still wish Hogan would use his nWo theme music.  I thought it was supposed to be “4 life!”… brutha!  Lots of chants for Hogan, but not nearly as many as there are in the “Yes Movement!”.  Hulk brings out Arnold and Joe.  Someone please come out and stop this crap.  Arnold and Joe in the Battle Royal?  Lord, I hope not!  I’d rather see Hornswoggle.  And luckily, here comes The Miz. He’s going to get punked.  I hope not, but I know so.  And there you go.  I hope he got a big bonus for that piece of stupidity. Miz says he’s going to win the Battle Royal.  Hogan country, my ass!  Miz punked out by two actors and Arnold – that’s just so wrong on so many counts.  I don’t care what anyone says.  He’s the Miz… and he’s… DECENT!
 
Total Divas Note:  I would love to see Natayla unleashed and totally kick Summer Rae’s ass.  She (Natayla) deserves so much better than she gets treated.  The Rock is playing Hercules.  Titus O’Neil is here and fighting The Big Show.  This should be short and sweet.  And yes, it was.  I hope that Undertaker and Brock have a great segment because the quality level is falling quickly. I wish I hadn’t quit drinking.  This makes me want a Platinum.  Or a Pepsi.  Can’t go wrong with Pepsi.  Steph and HHH are backstage. And here’s The Shield.  The Shield want to make sure that things with The Authority are cool despite their problems with Kane and The New Age Outlaws.  Steph makes match of Real Americans versus The Shield and says that they can all talk later.  John Cena is in the bathroom looking in the mirror.  Looks like he’s having issues.  Maybe he’ll see The Warrior in the mirror.  Nah, we can’t see him.  Was that supposed to mean anything.  Cena is jumpy.  Hell, if my girlfriend was made of plastic, I’d be jumpy too.  Ok, that makes no sense. At least I’m trying.  I should have stopped with the Warrior reference.
 
Luke Harper took the fight to Cena on Smackdown, but Super-Cena won. And now, it’s John Cena versus Luke Harper again.  New shirt – “You Can’t Stop Me”.  Yeah, whatever John.  I like how Bray has started naming the town before he says, “We’re here!”.  Sounds like most of the fans are for Harper.  “Let’s Go Harper” chant.  “Fruity Pebbles” chant too. I don’t think that Cena is the fan favorite here.  Harper reminds me of a modern day version of Bruiser Brody, but not quite as crazy.  Could you imagine a tag team of Harper and Mike Knox?  That’s a “Captain Lou” style tag team right there, but they’d be awesome.  “Shades of MIke Awesome” suicide dive by harper.  That was great.  And time to repeat myself.  As Joey Styles would say, “Oh my God!”.  I’m enjoying this match.  Lights are off and when they come back on, Cena is tied in the ropes and wearing the goat mask of Rowan.  Bray laughs and Harper is still getting the cheers and chants.  The lights went off and I was hoping for an ECW chant and an appearance by Sabu when they came back on.  This works too though.  Bray Wyatt versus Sabu – that would be fun to see.  The Wyatts versus Raven’s Flock?  Even better.  I guess the match is no contest, but in my mind, Harper wins.
 
It’s Funkadactyl Time.  Naomi is wrestling AJ Lee, with Tamina.  Naomi looks like a pirate.  AJ and Tamina still reminds me of HBK and Diesel.  AJ isn’t ready to play tonight and walks out. The ref counts her out.  Winner by Count-out – Naomi.  Here comes Vickie. EXCUSE ME!  Vickie heard the comments that AJ made about her and Vickie has an announcement. Vickie calls AJ a bitch.  At Wrestlemania XXX, there will be a Divas Championship Invitational.  Vickie names off about a dozen names – al the WWE Divas versus AJ for the title.  Tamina seems happy.  Vickie is estatic.  And AJ freaks out and isn’t a happy camper at all.  
 
We see a replay of Paul Heyman from last week talking about Brock ending the streak.  This comes from the Main Event. Taker tells Heyman to tell Lesnar that in New Orleans, Taker will “slay the beast”.  Brock and Undertaker are both here tonight.  So was Scooby Doo and Arnold.  I’m not impressed.  We get an announcement next.  Survey says, one more for the bad guys!.  Oh yeah, by the way, congratulations to Razor Ramon, aka Scott Hall – he’s next and I’m not talking about a match against Goldberg.  Hall deserves it!  Good for him!  The video though, it’s all about “Razor Ramon” and not Scott Hall in the AWA, Florida or WCW.  Razor is just a small part of the story for his great career. That part sucks and why the character and not the real name?  It should be “Hall” and not “Razor”, but I guess we’ll take what we can get.  He still deserves the honor.  
 
Next week is Randy Orton versus Batista.  Daniel Bryan tweeted that he’s not cleared to be on RAW tonight.  It’s The Shield  versus The Real Americans.  Ambrose and Rollins versus Swagger and Cesaro.  This is going to be a good match. Too bad “Uncle Zeb” is not active in the ring anymore or we could have one helluva six-man tag.  Anyone remember The Kansas Jayhawks – Bobby Jaggers & Dutch Mantell (Zeb).  I still wonder sometimes what Zeb has done with Shoe-Baby.  WE THE PEOPLE!  I love how the cable channel shows commercials for TNA shows during RAW.  Cool!
 
Ambrose and Rollins attacked The Real Americans on the ramp.  “We The People” chant.  These five guys (and Zeb) are awesome.  Today is Jack Swagger’s birthday. Happy Birthday to the All-American American.  A longer feud between these two teams would be fun to watch.  Time for some “Shades of John Anderson” swinging.  Twenty rotations.  Hell, I’m dizzy.  The fans finally got their “We the People” moment after Ambrose ate the fan-barrier wall. I’m going to call it now – don’t know when or where, but Cesaro will be the next U.S. Champion and the man who beats Ambrose for the gold.  Either Cesaro or Zack Ryder.  I think I’m better off picking Cesaro.  Ambrose is a nut. I like this dude.  And Rollins is on fire as well.  I knew this would be a good match.  “Holy Shit!” chant. The Shield wins and this match rocked!  Reigns levels Cesaro after the match.  The Shield clears the announce table. I like how Zeb kind of vanishes.   Trifecta Power-bomb for Cesaro as The Shield puts him through the table.  OUCH!  And here comes Kane, along with the New Age Outlaws.  Kane says that The Shield will face him and The New Age Outlaws at Wrestlemania XXX.  Believe that!
 
Paul Heyman and Brock Lesnar are headed towards the ring.  Heyman talks and he’s the best guy in wrestling on the mic today.  Heyman talks and builds up Taker and his legacy.  The better to build up how big it will be if Brock does win.  Heyman would make a great Insurance salesman or lawyer.  Brock gets the mic and  he’s here to fight.  Lesnar calls out The Undertaker.  And we get Druids carrying a casket to the ring.  They place it outside the ring and leave.  Did you see the flap on the ring apron move?  I did.  I wonder who moved it as they crawled under the ring?  Hmmmm…  Brock is checking things out by kicking at the casket.  That music is annoying. Why not play Eminem again?  The casket is empty. Brock and Heyman are not impressed. Neither am I.  Brock yells at The Druids.  They wisely retreat and go to the back.  Brock and Paul are back in the ring. Brock says he’s leaving.  Heyman starts slamming on Brooklyn and taking crap.  And then it opens up and Taker is laying there in the casket and sits up.  Heyman hauls ass.  Taker and Brock go eye to eye and Taker sends Brock to the floor.  I love Taker’s mascara.  Lesnar points at the Wrestlemania XXX sign and Taker makes that stupid face, sticking out his tongue.  Why do people do that?  Nikita Koloff used to do that and it annoyed me to no end and when Taker does that, it annoys me too.  The two men stare at each other and look threateningly at each other as the show ends.
 
Match Results…
 
Fatal 4-Way Match to determine #1 Contender for IC Title:  Christian beat Sheamus, Dolph Ziggler and Alberto Del Rio
Sin Cara w/ Scooby Doo beat Damien Sandow
Los Matadores beat Ryback & Curtis Axel
Cody Rhodes w/ Goldust beat Fandango w/ Summer Rae
The Big Show beat Titus O’Neil
Luke Harper versus John Cena – No Contest
Naomi beat AJ Lee by count-out.
The Shield (Dean Ambrose & Seth Rollins) w/ Roman Reigns beat The Real Americans (Jack Swagger & Cesaro) w/ Zeb Colter
 
And I guess that’s it.  A good show that had some good matches, but also had a couple of lame matches too.  More good than bad and so I won’t complain. But Big Show and Titus?  What a waste of time.  And that last segment just didn’t do it for me.  I want to see Brock versus Undertaker as much as the next person, but better to just let Heyman talk and leave Brock and Taker at home until April 6th.  That’s my opinion anyhow.  With that, I’m going to give it a rest and close this bad boy up.  I’ll be back late on Monday with a new edition of “Tossing Salt” and back again on Thursday with a new edition of “Fact or Fiction”.  And I’m thinking about doing an entire “Question Time” column later this week too.  No promises though. 
 
Questions and comments can be sent to Doug28352@yahoo.com.  Come visit me on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/saltpalace.  Add me – you know you want to.  I’m Doug and I’m out of here.  Until later, take it sleazy. Have a great week and thanks for reading. 
 
Ubuntu!

Friends…

Can you name 20 people you can think of right off the top of your head? Don’t read the questions underneath until you write the names of all 20 people, and be sure to tag the person who tagged you after completing it yourself. *this is a lot funnier if you actually list the names first, no cheating!*

1. Chris
2. Matt
3. Kenneth
4. Tamara
5. Michael
6. Theresa
7. Ron
8. James
9. Danny
10. Carman
11. Heidi
12. Bryan
13. Jeff
14. Eric
15. Daniel
16. Tian
17. Tatz
18. Parker
19. Russ
20. Brent

T H E Q U E S T I O N S . .

• How did you meet 10?
Not really sure – I’ve known him forever it seems, but I think it was probably through mutual friends back when we used to hang out uptown.

• What would you do if you had never met 6?
I would have missed out on one of the most awesome people I’ve ever known.

• What would you do if 20 and 15 dated?
I doubt that would happen – both are sexy men, but both are very straight and based on what I know of these two, they wouldn’t get along anyhow.

• If you could marry either 6 or 14 who will it be?
Number 6 is one of my best friends ever and #14 is one of the coolest and sexiest (and straightest) guys I know. Neither would be happy in a marriage with me though.

• Did you ever like 9?
I thought so until I realized just what truly an asswipe he really is. Great sex, but lousy person.

• Have you ever seen 4 cry?
Yes…

• Would 4 and 12 make a good couple?
Nah, I don’t think so…

• Would number 1 and 2 make a good couple?
Nope, I don’t think so. They’re both great guys and I love ’em both, but together? Not likely.

• Describe 8:
A body to kill for and a personality that makes you want to kill him…

• Last time you saw 12?
About a month ago – I need to give him a call. I miss that guy.

• Tell me something about 17:
Very stubborn, but very awesome as well. My sister in every way but blood. Love that young woman.

• What’s 7’s favorite color?
Ron’s favorite color? I have no idea.

• What would you do if 1 just confessed they liked you?
He better like me cause he’s my other (better) half and I’m in love with him… lol

•When was the last time you talked to number 5?
Far too long ago…

• How do you think 19 feels about you?
He gets frustrated with me and thinks I have issues (I do), but I think he still loves me though in his own way.

• What language does 13 speak?
English

• Who is 2 going out with?
I’m not sure – he’s got a woman that he sees off and on, but I think right now, it’s off. 😦

• What grade is 8 in?
No school for him – he’s an old fart… lol

• What is 5’s favorite music?
He listens to a little bit of everything, but I think the older country and 70’s rock is what he likes best.

• Would you ever date 3?
Nah, he’s like my lil’ bro and I value his friendship too much to screw it up. Besides, he’s got a great woman.

• Is 11 single?
At the moment, I’m not sure what exactly her status is, but if you’re a nice, decent single guy and interested, maybe I can hook ya’ll up.

•What’s 10’s last name?
Jeffries

• Where does 18 live?
On Hasty Road

• What do you think about 20?
Very creative, very smart, very cool and one of my best buds…

• What is the best thing about 4?
She has really done so much over the past year and is so incredible – a great mother too.

• What would you like to tell 16 right now?
I love her and am here for her.

• How did you meet 9?
He came into the Kangaroo where I was working and we realized we were neighbors.

• What is the best and worst thing about 2?
Best is his great personality, easy good natured ways and sexy ass – worst are his demons which he fights daily..

Wrestling Fact Or Fiction: March 20, 2014

Wrestling Fact Or Fiction
March 20, 2014
Doug Maynard
 
How’s it going, my friends?  It’s time again for your Thursday afternoon guilty pleasure, the infamous “Tossing Salt Presents:  Wrestling Fact Or Fiction” column.  And along with that little piece, we’ve got the always fun “One On One” bit and just a couple of questions to round things out.  Time is short right now, just like an ex of mine, so I’m going to can the chit-chat and just get to getting things done, okay?  Okay-doke.  
 
Happy Birthday to one-half of one of North Carolina’s greatest independent wrestling tag teams, B.D. Productions, the one and only Brad Branson.  Hope you have a great day and much continued success in that squared circle.  By the way, bring back BDTV.  Happy Birthday Bro…
 
And now, let’s go…
 
One On One…
 
“One On One” is where I take a wrestler from days gone by and match them up against one of the stars of today. It’s fantasy wrestling at it’s best as I analyze and ponder who would win a match if these people, in their primes, were to face each other “One On One”. Let’s do this…
 
Bray Wyatt versus Mankind (Mick Foley)
 
A few days ago, Mick Foley sent out a tweet that said, “I think @WWEBrayWyatt may be a #BetterMankindThanMankind. Awesome stuff from a modern master of the microphone. #Raw”  And that got me to thinking… who would win in a match between these two men, Mick Foley, as Mankind and the leader of the Wyatt Family, Bray Wyatt.  
 
Just imagine the promos leading up to this match.  That would probably be the most exciting part, building the anticipation.  The match itself would be a clinic in brutality.  Neither man seems to feel pain and it would be totally smash-mouth and hard-hitting. Wyatt has the size and strength advantage in my opinion and probably the endurance advantage too.  And Mankind… Foley just had most foes psyched out long before the bell ever rang. Plus I think I’d give Foley the advantage in actual wrestling moves, although he rarely uses them.  But then again, Wyatt is a third generation superstar so he’s been around the business since birth.  Bray hasn’t really had that many singles matches in the WWE to really go by and judge from so it’s all purely speculation.
 
Both men would go all out and it would probably go all over the arena, with lots and lots of shenanigans and plunder involved.  At this point in his career, compared to where Foley was during the Mankind era,  it would be one helluva match and I think the edge, although very slight, would go to Foley.  And when the smoke cleared and the dust settled and the blood was all wiped away, my gut instinct tells me that Mick Foley, aka “Mankind” would be the man to get that arm raised and take that trip to the pay-window.  
 
Winner:  Mankind (Mick Foley)
 
And now, let’s go to the mailbag and answer a couple of questions…
 
Question Time…
 
Ricky Pruitt:  What was your favorite feud in WCW?
 
There were so many great feuds that come to mind when I think about WCW including The Horsemen versus Sting, Flair versus Terry Funk, The Midnight Express versus The Rock & Roll Express, Flyin’ Brian versus Kevin Sullivan, Zbyszko versus Lord Steven Regal, Hollywood Blondes (Austin & Pillman) versus Flair and Arn, etc.  It was a great time for wrestling fans. But the two that stand out most for me and I consider my “favorites” are the Larry Zbyszko versus Scott Hall moments on Nitro.  I remember Hall and Zbyszko from their AWA days and their rivalry just worked so well for the times.  And the other is Kevin Sullivan versus Chris Benoit. That “Falls Count Anywhere” match they had was absolute brutality and then, when you take into account the actual behind the scenes stories and situations between these two men (and Woman), it just made it that much more intense and incredible.  I saw a lot of great matches and feuds in WCW, but in my eyes, those two were the best.
 
Joseph Bowden:  If you can make a faction that features no current WWE wrestlers to be in WWE, who would it be? 
 
In my mind, for a faction to work, you should have at least four men and maybe a female as well with one wrestler to focus on the main singles title, one to focus on the secondary title, and one to primarily be a tag team.  But make sure that all of your wrestlers are good enough to switch roles as the need may be.  And with that in mind, my “faction” would consist of my tag team, Chris Masters and Carlito, my secondary singles guy in Rob Conway, my primary singles guy in Mark Jindrak and Lisa Marie Varon, aka “Victoria” as my Diva.  And I’d try to find a proper manager / spokesman to represent the group.  My pick for that role, if available, would be Stevie Richards.
 
And there you go.  Now let’s move on to the meat of the column.  It must time for that Fact Or Fiction thing I do so well….
 
Wrestling Fact Or Fiction…
 
As usual, the questions come from my friends at 411mania.com/wrestling.  And the answers?  That comes from me.
 
1. The closing angle of Raw was a great way to build heat on the Triple H vs. Daniel Bryan match at WrestleMania.
 
FACT:  Before that epic beatdown (and the added stipulation by HHH that if he wins, he’ll be in the title match), my anticipation for the match between Bryan and HHH was somewhat bleh!  It’ll be a good match, Bryan needs to win, yada yada yada.  But I just couldn’t really get into it. And now, after watching HHH dominate and destroy Bryan, even though it ran a bit long, I want to see HHH get his ass kicked.  And I want to see Stephanie get her ass kicked even more. I wonder if there’s a Diva that’s affiliated with Bryan that could step up and do the job?  Hmmmmm.  It did what it needed to do and changed my mild interest into something major.  A great job by the WWE and all parties involved.
 
2. By bringing in Brittany (formerly Santana Garrett) and the returning Angelina Love, you have hope that TNA will start focusing on the Knockouts Division once again.
 
FICTION:  If their prior track record is any indication, they’ll focus and then drop it, like they do everything else.  TNA has some strong women performers and it’d be nice to see them get some attention and time in the sun, but TNA has to concentrate first on their overall product and the problems there. They’re losing money, unable to gain any new viewers and the story-lines are confusing at best and totally screwy the rest of the time.  I’d like to see the Knockouts get some credit due and get to see some great action with Love, Brittany, Gail Kim, Rayne, etc.  But in the laundry list of the things that TNA needs to do, there are many other things that have to take priority first.
 
3. Cesaro should win the Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal.
 
FICTION:  It would be nice and I would have no objections if he did win, but Cesaro is getting over pretty strongly right now and doesn’t need to win. Just so long as he looks strong and has a good showing, that will be more than enough.
 
4. Adam Rose currently has the coolest entrance in wrestling.
 
FICTION:  He’s good and that entrance is great, but the coolest? I’ll stick with The Wyatts for that honor.
 
5. TNA running three events at the Hammerstein Ballroom in New York is a long overdue move for the company.
 
FICTION:  From the reports that I’ve seen, they’re paying $300,000 to run these events and let’s be real here.  If the stories we’ve been hearing about pay cuts, paychecks being late, medical bills not paid, low attendance at house shows, and the other problems are even half true, then why blow that much money?  They probably won’t even break even and this is not a time for TNA to throw money away and take dumb risks that probably won’t pan out.  And in my opinion, I don’t see how this can work to their advantage. It just doesn’t make sense.
 
6. It’s about time that Mr. T went into the WWE Hall of Fame.
 
FACT:  He was a huge part of Wrestlemania I and Wrestlemania II.  If any celebrity deserves a spot in the “Celebrity Wing”, Mr. T should have been the first one to be inducted.  Well, maybe Cyndi Lauper should have been first, but Mr. T is right there with her.  This should have happened years ago and is very long overdue.
 
7. While focusing on new and or younger talent is a good idea, TNA should not get rid of such valuable performers like Daniels and Kazarian while doing so.
 
FACT:  New faces are good and essential to the product, but old faces, especially those as skilled and talented as Daniels and Kazarian are what brings in the older fans and are too damn good to be overlooked or forgotten about. The new kids need older talents to show them the ropes, mentor them and give them that rub to help the fans connect.  Daniels and Kaz are two of the best in the business and can serve in so many roles in TNA, both in the ring and behind the scenes.  For TNA to cut them from the roster is not only wrong, it’s also a damn disgrace.
 
And with that, I think I’m finished for the day.  Questions and comments can be sent to Doug28352@yahoo.com.  Or you can come visit me on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/saltpalace. Thank you for reading.  I’m Doug and I am out of here.  Have a great week and don’t forget to support your local Indy wrestling company.  That is the future. Take it sleazy and I’ll catch you on the flip side.
 
Ubuntu!
 
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