Wrestlemania 29 Thoughts and Predictions

We are ten days away from the biggest show of the year… Wrestlemania 29. It’s the (surviving) Granddaddy of them all. I say “surviving” because Starcade was first, but unfortunately, it died with WCW (and I still miss it) and by process of elimination, it’s all about Wrestlemania now. Can I get a “hell yeah”? And what I’m going to do here and now is take a look at the matches announced thus far for the big show and give my thoughts and predictions for each match. I know that with more than a week still to go, the whole “card subject to change” stipulation can still be enacted and some matches may be tweeked or added, but I’m doing this based on the here and now and with the most current information available (and because now is when I have the time. May not have it later… lol.)

Also, the plans are as of now for myself and the Infamous K-Mak to do a video sometime between next Monday’s RAW and Smackdown talking about Wrestlemania and making our predictions and analysis there as well. So look for that on my Facebook page and on YouTube as well. And just because you’re reading my thoughts here doesn’t mean you shouldn’t watch the video when it comes out. After all, I may (and probably) will change my mind on a few things. Just saying.

So… who is planning to buy Wrestlemania 29 on the pay-per-view next Sunday? I was thinking about it and still might, but the build and hype for the show have been terrible and although there are a couple of matches that I’d like to see, there really isn’t enough of anything special to make me want to dish out sixty bucks here. It’s a solid card to be sure and I doubt that any of the matches will totally suck, but aside from the Taker versus Punk match, nothing here is “must see” and fresh or original. Even the Taker / Punk situation is a rematch from a few years ago, but Punk has changed so much since then that it’s still worth seeing. The rest of the matches though… uugh! Seems more like a jacked up edition of RAW than the biggest show of the year. I may change my mind, but as of this moment, right here and now, unless I can get some of my Peeps to go in on the costs with me, I doubt I’ll be buying it. It’s too much of nothing special to justify the extra costs.

But I can still go over the matches announced and do some predictions, can’t I? Of course I can. So let’s go ahead and get to stepping and do just that. And away we go.

Tossing Salt Media, Inc and InFamousTV Presents:
Tossing Salt – Worldwide News: Wrestlemania 29 Thoughts And Predictions
March 28, 2013

Let’s do this…

WWE champion The Rock vs. John Cena.

I’m kind of torn on this one because I do NOT want to see The Rock as the WWE Champion. I’m glad he’s back (albeit temporarily) and he’s fun to watch and listen to, but he doesn’t need to be the Champ. That honor should be reserved for someone who can promote the company, work the heavy schedule and has earned the privilege. And Rock, despite his history, isn’t that man anymore.

But I also don’t like or want to see John Cena as the WWE Champion. I know that he’s the “go to” guy for the WWE and their big man on campus, but he doesn’t need the belt and I think it hurts the WWE when they push Cena down everyone’s throat as the champion so often. It’s been almost a year and 1/2 since the last time Cena was champ, but the thought of him holding that gold and screaming at us every week on RAW that, “the champ is here” makes me stomach turn. Cena is a decent wrestler and a good dude from all reports, but the WWE title should be carried by a CM Punk or a Daniel Bryan or even a Miz again before Cena gets it back again.

And here we have the epic Cena – Rock rematch from Wrestlemania 28 and this time, the WWE gold is on the line. Either way, no matter who wins, I think the WWE fans lose out because neither Cena nor Rock need the title to get over and make this match important and WWE could have gotten two big matches (Rock versus Cena, Punk as the WWE Champ versus whoever) for Wrestlemania instead of just one match and having to stick Punk with Undertaker. Opportunities for more matches and to help build another star / name were lost in the system. Just saying.

So this match… who wins? It’s simple. Rock won last year so Cena wins this year. And a rubber match at SummerSlam to break the tie. Yep, that sounds about right.

Winner and NEW WWE Champion: John Cena

World champion Alberto Del Rio vs. Jack Swagger

Another match that no one really cares about. Del Rio is a good wrestler, but as a baby-face, he sucks. He’s not real or believable. And I like Jack Swagger and his new character development, especially with the addition of Zeb Colter, aka “Dirty” Dutch Mantell. I’ve always liked the idea of managers and anytime we can have Dutch involved, I like that too. He’s done a great job helping to get Jack over with this whole “We the people” routine. Actually, he’s doing too good a job because the “We the people” story is getting over with a lot of fans and getting cheered as much as it’s getting booed. Del Rio is not a sympathetic character and so much of what Dutch and Swagger is saying is true. Maybe we’ll see a double-turn at Wrestlemania and Del Rio can show his “true colors” and turn heel while Swagger (and Dutch) can do the face turn. That might be the only possibility that makes this match worth watching and exciting to me. Nothing against the two wrestlers (and their associates) involved, but right now, it’s just not doing it for me.

As for the match result and ending? Swagger got busted for a DWI a few weeks ago. No way he’s walking out of there as the World Champion. So for this match…

Winner and NEW World Champion: Jack Swagger w/ Zeb Colter…

And here’s where it gets interesting. I said that “no way he’s walking out of there as the World Champion”. That’s because, immediately after defeating Del Rio and capturing the World Championship, it’ll be time to see Dolph Ziggler walk out and cash in that “Money In The Bank” contract. Del Rio lays out Swagger after the match. Ziggler comes out and hits the “Zig Zag” finisher. Pin and cover. New World Champion in de’ house.

Money In The Bank Contract Cashing: World Championship Match
Dolph Ziggler versus Jack Swagger

Already told you what happens. And the former Spirit Squad member becomes the World Champion. Well deserved and ’nuff said!

Winner: Dolph Ziggler

CM Punk vs. The Undertaker

I would much rather have been seeing Punk defending the WWE Championship while Taker used his annual “one match” to build another person (Christian?) to superstar / iconic status, but I will admit that the build for this match, even though some of it seems a bit rushed, has peaked my attention. Punk has embraced his inner heel and really run with the whole “Urn” thing and Taker… well, all he has to do is stand around and look like an evil and pissed off S.O.B. Mission accomplished.

So will the streak survive or will CM Punk, the “Best in the World”, be the man to make history and cause the end of an era, breaking the legacy and myth that is Undertaker at Wrestlemania 29? After losing the WWE Championship to The Rock and then being defeated by John Cena on RAW, Punk needs a strong match and a win to keep his momentum alive. And Taker? Well, Wrestlemania is pretty much all he has left these days and all that the body can handle these days. So no matter who wins, someone is getting screwed over big time.

So how does this end? Punk and Taker pull out all the stops and have one helluva match for the ages. And Punk gives Taker everything he can handle plus more and scores about a dozen or so 2 9/10th counts on the Dead Man. And then, just when it looks like Punk is ready to win and put Taker away for good and break the streak, a freak accident or distraction happens. Taker takes advantage and scores the quick and surprise win, snatching victory from the jaws of defeat. Taker wins and the streak survives.

Winner: The Undertaker

But that’s not the end of the story. Taker wins the match and the streak is alive and well. But the next night on RAW, Taker is there to put over the match and celebrate his victory. An ambush and attack by Punk that lays out Taker and ends up with the Dead Man being stretchered out of the arena. Thus, Taker won the battle (at Wrestlemania), but Punk can claim he wins the war by putting the Taker out of wrestling for good and sending him out on a stretcher. Punk stays strong and the Streak stays alive until next year. Plus if Taker is willing, he can come back at Summerslam and attempt to get revenge, thus setting up another match and giving the WWE a strong main event match for that show. It’s a win – win for all parties involved. I’d love to see Punk beat the streak, but realistically, that won’t happen and this is the next best option available, at least in my opinion.

No Holds Barred, Triple H’s Career on the line: Brock Lesnar vs. Triple H.

I don’t mind Brock and HHH beating the hell out of each other. I don’t mind the “No Holds Barred” stipulation. But HHH’s career is on the line. So freakin’ what? He’s already pretty much retired from the ring as it is. Unless Heyman comes out on Monday and states that the “career” is Hunter’s job as the C.O.O. of the WWE, it’s a dumb stipulation that really doesn’t make any sense. I hope that someone in WWE Creative realizes that and we can see some clarification before the match next Sunday night.

As for this match, I expect we’ll see Paul Heyman in Brock’s corner and I’d like to see HBK, he who suffered a “broken arm” at the hands of Brock, in HHH’s corner as well. I kind of expect that we’ll see this announced on Monday (hopefully) to help add some interest to this match because it needs something. I think it’ll be brutal and stiff and just lots of Brock and HHH just beating the holy hell out of each other. And since HHH won their first match last year, I expect to see Brock and Heyman come out on top this time. There’s just too much storyline potential with a cocky and victorious Heyman / Lesnar team that can be exploited and I think that HHH / the WWE sees this. Brock wins and crows loudly. HHH fades away to his backstage duties (until he decides to make his return to the ring, damn the stipulation). And life in the WWE goes on.

Winner: Brock Lesnar w/ Paul Heyman

WWE Tag Team champions Daniel Bryan & Kane vs. Dolph Ziggler & Big E. Langston w/ AJ Lee

This is a throw-away match to get the tag champs on the card and to give Dolph a reason to be there and dressed to wrestle. Kane and Bryan are over as the champs and Dolph is going to end the night as the World Champion. So Team Hell No wins quickly and decisively here. ‘Nuff said!

Winners and STILL WWE Tag Team Champions: Team Hell No – Daniel Bryan and Kane

The Shield vs. Big Show & Randy Orton & Sheamus

This should be another solid and decent match, but it’s also one that is more filler than anyone else. I don’t think that The Shield is ready to lose yet. There is still far too much potential and too many things to still do with them. So the story here will be can Big Show, Sheamus and Randy Orton all get along and work as a team? And the answer will be… “NO”. Look for missed tags and miscommunication between Orton, Sheamus and Show and just when it seems that they’re ready to win, they’ll cross signals and someone (probably Show) will get pinned, thus giving The Shield the big win. And I’m calling it here now too. Heel turn after the match. Randy Orton lays out Shemus and Show. Just saying.

Winners: The Shield

Mark Henry vs. Ryback

This is a match that I’m looking forward too. Mark Henry is a monster and has really been on a roll for a while now, injuries permitting of course. And Ryback is the WWE’s version of Goldberg and he’s a legitimate monster as well. Both men are too damn strong for words and this could really be a good “big man” match. No wrestling here – just high impact and power moves and that works for me. I want to see this. As for who wins, it should be Mark Henry. He’s the veteran and the far better of the two in the ring. Ryback, despite his push, still is a bit too green for my tastes. But Ryback is also the pet project of Vince and the flavor of the month so that means he gets the win. And we get to hear that stupid line, stolen directly from the “Little Shop of Horrors” one more time.

Winner: Ryback

The Miz vs. Wade Barrett

I’m assuming that this is an Intercontinental Championship match. Barrett is damn good and Miz is awesome. Don’t believe him? Just ask him and he’ll tell you. I’d rather see him as a heel instead of as a face, but it doesn’t matter. He’s still fun to watch. I expect we’ll have a decent match and I also expect that we’ll see Miz’s new BFF, the “Nature Boy” Ric Flair make an appearance in Miz’s corner too. Woooooooo! And when all is said and done, we have a new IC Champion. And that, my friends, will be AWESOME!

Winner and NEW Intercontinental Champion: The Miz

Tensai & Brodus Clay & Naomi & Cameron vs. Team Rhodes Scholars & The Bellas

This will be either the pre-show match on YouTube or else the designated bathroom break match of the night. Does anyone want to see this disaster in the making happen? I don’t. Cody deserves better than this. Tensai and Clay win and dance a lot. Toliets all around the world flush at once. Bleh!

Winners: The Dancing Fools, 2013 Edition

Chris Jericho versus Fandango

And speaking of dancing fools, we have the WWE’s newest creation, Fandango versus the man who appeared on Dancing With The Stars, Chris Jericho. And I’m actually thinking I’ll enjoy this match because I have faith that Jericho can carry almost anyone to a good match and I like Johnny Curtis, even though admittingly, this is a stupid character thus far. It’s a big deal for Curtis to get to make his televised in-ring debut at Wrestlemania so I expect he’ll be on his game and ready to do the best he can. And with Jericho helping him along, it should be an entertaining match.

As for who wins, it doesn’t make sense for a character that’s debuting to lose his first match. That would kill the character from the very beginning. So look for the man who wants us to say his name to steal the win and come out on top. And why? Because he’s Fandango!

Winner: Fandango

And this last one hasn’t been announced yet, but I fully expect it to happen based on the results of the Diva’s Championship match from this past week’s edition of RAW. AJ Lee defeated the Diva’s Champion, Kaitlyn, by a count out. Thus AJ deserves a rematch for the title, right? So…

WWE Divas Champion Kaitlyn versus AJ Lee

Kaitlyn sucks in the ring. AJ is over as a character and it’d be fun to see AJ and Dolph as the WWE’s new “power couple” with both of them holding titles. So I think AJ beats Kaitlyn and wins the title. Works for me.

Winner and NEW Diva Champion: AJ Lee

And there you have it, card and predictions subject to change of course. But for now, that’s how I think Wrestlemania 29 will go down. Just my opinions and thoughts. Am I right? Probably, but who knows?

So what are your predictions? Who do you think will walk out Wrestlemania as the winners and losers? Will the streak end? Will we have new WWE or World Champions? Will the U.S. Champion Antonio Cesaro end up with a match on the show? Will HHH tear a quad? Inquiring minds want to know so use the comments section of this blog or my Facebook page and let me know.

I’m going to close this up for now, I guess. Time to go watch some VH1 Classic Videos (they’re playing some great 80’s and 90’s stuff today) and work on a piece about the Supreme Court and DOMA. Busy day ahead and I’ve got to get to stepping. Look for the Tossing Salt video with more Wrestlemania 29 analysis and talk from myself and K-Mak later in the week. And I guess that’s it. Thanks for reading. Have a great day.


Letter To The Editor: Voter ID Laws

Back on October 25, 2011, I wrote a “Letter to the Editor” of our local paper concerning the idea of Voter ID Laws… Here is that letter in it’s entirety… Enjoy!

Dear Editor,

Not quite so long ago, the State of South Carolina passed a Voter ID Law that requires voters to show valid identification when coming to vote. A similar law has been proposed for here in North Carolina and is currently under scrutiny. It seems simple enough, doesn’t it. After all, what’s the big deal, right?

And then the naysayers started. According to The South Carolina Election Commission, who decided to look at the problems concerning this new law, the precients with the largest number of voters not allowed to cast a ballot due to not having ID, were generally areas with a large non-white population and most specifically in areas where there were a large number of black college students.

South Carolina Democratic Party Chairman Dick Harpootlian issued a statement saying that this new law “is disenfranchising huge groups of people who don’t have the money to go get an ID card”. MSNBC Commentator Chris Matthews took it a step farther on his show, “Hardball”, where he accused SC Governor Nikki Haley (R) of being out of touch and then compared the new Voter ID law to Jim Crow era racism, stating “”There have been complaints by many South Carolinians that the law [requiring citizens to show photo identification at the polls] will effectively end up disenfranchising many traditionally Democratic supporters in the state.”

It just goes on and on and on as cries of racism and voter supression ring out all across the land. It’s not fair to make the 80 year old Grandma show ID to vote. It’s not fair to force these people, who are in bad health and on fixed incomes go down and get a valid picture ID. It’s not fair that these students, who are hard at work trying to study and learn and prepare for their futures, to force them to go down and get an ID card. It’s all discrimination and voter supression. It’s racist.

I’m calling it right now. Bullcrap!

If these allegedly supressed voters want to write a check, they have to show ID. If they want to open an account at a bank or withdraw money from a bank account, they have to show ID. If they want to buy a pack of cigarettes or buy a six pack of beer, they have to show an ID. If they have a job, they’re required by law to show ID before being hired. If they drive, they have to have a license which is (surprise) a picture ID. If they want to get married, they have to show an ID. If they apply for Food Stamps or unemployment benefits or disability or Medicare or any kind of Government aid, they have to show an ID. If they want to open any kind of account anywhere or rent a home or buy a car or buy insurance or be admitted into a hospital, people have to show an ID.

Let me guess. All of those things are voter supression and racist too, right?

Showing an ID is just a simple fact of life and unless you don’t drive, don’t have a bank account, don’t pay bills, don’t have an income or job, don’t visit doctor’s offices, don’t drink and don’t smoke and have no contact of any kind with the real world, you will be required at some point in your life to have a valid ID card. That’s just how it is and anyone who claims otherwise is just far more out of touch than Chris Matthews seems to feel SC Governor Haley allegedly is.

If you’re going to vote in SC, be prepared to show an ID. If you can’t show an ID, as you aleady do for so many other purposes in daily life, then you don’t deserve the right to vote. It not disenfranchising or racist. It’s just the way things are in order to prevent voter fraud and non-citizens from attempting to vote. It might be inconvenient, but so what? Life gets that way sometimes and it’s about time that all of these rabble-rousers claiming “racism” at every drop of a hat wise up and learn this.

Thank you,
Douglas Maynard

Booking A Night Of RAW…

If you were given a chance to book a Monday Night Raw card, what would you book? – Maximum 6 matches.

This question was asked on the Jerichoholics Fan Page on Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/JerichoFTW) and I just have to respond. I wish I could book an entire RAW show, complete with promos and segements, but this one only specifies the wrestling card itself. So what matches would I book? I’m going to put a few restrictions on myself and try to keep to the current storylines and build to Wrestlemania 27 that’s going on and answer this question as if Vince called me up and said “be here on Monday – you’re doing the last RAW before Wrestlemania. Steph and the creative folks will take take of the promos and other segments, but you get to be in charge of the six matches we’re showing on Monday night.”

Let’s open up with some build for the possible Intercontinental Championship match and have Miz wrestle against William Regal. Wade Barrett can do commentary at ringside and we can see Regal put on a wrestling clinic before Miz obviously gets the win.

Chris Jericho versus Heath Slater would be next up to allow Jericho to have a great match in preparation for his match against Fandango and also allow Slater and the 3MB some television time too. Jericho could cut a promo on Fandango before the match and tell “Junior” to watch and learn. Jericho wins.

Zack Ryder & Michael McGillicutty versus Cody Rhodes & Damien Sandow versus The New Age Outlaws versus The Usos in a four corners tag match to determine the Number One Contenders for the tag team titles after Wrestlemania. Surprise time – I’d have Zack and Michael score the win and start getting the push they deserve.

Daniel Bryan versus Randy Orton – for no reason other than to have a great match… Dolph and his crew could sit and do ringside commentary. Kane would also come down to support his partner. Randy could win due to Dolph and friends getting involved, but then Randy could join the Hell-Np guys at the end and send the Ziggler Effect running.

Mini 10-Man Battle Royal to determine who will face U.S. Champion Antonio Cesaro at Wrestlemania: Kofi Kingston versus Sheamus versus R-Truth versus Alex Riley versus Great Khali versus Santino Marella versus Bo Dallas versus Sin Cara versus Primo versus Chris Masters… Guess who wins? He’s a hero and making a return – he deserves it.

Six Man Tag as the main event: Mark Henry, CM Punk and Jack Swagger w/ Zeb Coulter versus John Cena, Alberto Del Rio and Ryback. Heels win – big brawl at the end to end the show.

And there you go – lots of matches and action, lots of potential good wrestling, the return of Chris Masters, the kind of main event that Vince loves promoting three big main event matches for Wrestlemania and the use of several great talents who rarely get TV time and deserve better. Add some backstage stuff with Vickie, the Divas, and HHH, as well as in-ring promos by Brock & Heyman, Undertaker and The Rock and you’ve got a great go-home show for Wrestlemania 27. At least I think so…


Adventures In Taterville – March 19, 2013

Good morning, my little saltines. How you be this lovely (and cold) AM? Yeah, my abuse of the english language is pretty autrocious, but I can’t help it. I have a cat and it’s all her fault. Besides, if I actually spoke and wrote properly, no one would believe it was me. I went to Scotland High School, damn it, and speaking correctly is not something that they put great emphasis on. Not any more anyhow. And then when you factor in the enviroment that I work in, it’s even worse. I don’t mind ignorance, but some (not all – let me clarify that, but more than half) take it to a new level.

I’m just going to do a small rant this morning about a lovely incident that happened last night at work – my first night back at the store after a two week absence – that really reaffirmed my total contempt and disgust with the way some people act.

I had a young girl come in, probably thirteen or fourteen years old and she asked to get a money order. “I want a money order”, she said. Okay, that’s cool, so I asked her how much the money order is for so I can ring it up and print it up. She just stood there, not saying anything. So I asked her again and she said “forty dollars”. I repeated it to her to confirm it was $40. People wonder why we repeat what they just said and get mad, but we ask to make sure and avoid mistakes. She stood there with a blank look on her face and then repeated, “forty dollars!”.

So I went ahead and filled out the money order log – one money order for forty dollars and rang it up. It comes to 40.79, which is the amount of the money order and the fee (cost of the actual money order). She just stood there, looking lost and not saying anything. I asked her again, “forty dollars, right?”, because I could see that she was struggling and was in her own little world. She said “yeah” and signed the money order log, which clearly stated “forty dollars”. I rang her up, collected her money, and then printed out the money order for $40 and gave it to her, along with her change. And she looked at it, walked out of the store and left.

End of story, right? Nope, of course not.

Probably five minutes later, here comes that girl again. And she lays the money order down on the counter and says that “you did this wrong. I want two money order that be forty dollars”. I was kind of confused here and asked her, “you wanted two money orders for forty dollars each?”. And she shook her head, saying “I want two money order that be forty dollars.”

Okay, so you want what? I get the “two money order” part, but it sounds to me that she wants two money orders for forty bucks each. And she’s just standing there, with a totally lost look on her face and by this point, I’m sure that the look on my face isn’t much better because she’s confusing the hell out of me too. Then she finally spits it out after several moments of frustration.

“I want two money order that be twenty dollar which be forty dollar!”

Okay, I finally make the translation and it’s two twenty-dollar money orders, which together will add up to forty bucks. So why didn’t she just say so in the first place. So I take the original forty dollar money order and tell her that I’ll cash it for her and then we can get her two for twenty each. That’s cool and I cash the $40 money order and give her the forty dollars. I’m filling out the money order log and now, here comes Mama into the store. Oh happy day!

Mama wants to know what’s taking the girl so long and why I screwed up the money order. She wanted two of them for $20 each. I’ve got that, but that wasn’t what the girl, who she (Mama) sent in to handle this, originally said. She said “$40” and that’s what she got. And I’ve refunded the $40 and am attempting to fix the problem.

And then Mama said that “we only got to pay one time fee cause we already paid for that first money order that YOU screwed up”. I didn’t screw it up – I printed out and gave the girl exactly what she asked for, which was a forty dollar money order. If the girl had spoken up or said what she actually wanted instead of mangling the english language, there would have never been any problems to begin with. As for the fee, which is what she was raising hell about now, we’re required to charge that fee (seventy-nine cents) for every money order printed or sold. It’s not optional. It’s the rules of the store and if I didn’t charge it, it’d be shorting my register at the end of the night.

I started to explain this to Mama, but she’s just going off and rambling about everything under the sun and how some “white mutha” is trying to rip her off and about a million different things, all insulting to me.

And guess what? Surprisingly, I kept my head, didn’t get mad or raise my voice (shocking, I know) and didn’t give her the verbal bitch-slap that she was asking for. I tried once more to explain everything and why there would be a fee for each money order if I printed out two new ones and she just wasn’t listening. So she said to just give her the $40 money order back and threw (yes, she literally threw) the money that I had refunded to her daughter at me. I handed her the money order, still being polite and very professional, and she snatched it from my hand.

Then she let out a few more curses and stormed out the door. I did get in one shot to “have a great night” and she glared at me pretty harshly. If looks could kill… lol. “I’m gonna have a great night, you dumb-ass mutha f*cker”, she snapped and stormed out the door.

And I just shook my head, let out a little chuckle, and went on to my next customer.

One of my co-workers commented that he would have “went off” when she threw the money at me and didn’t see how I could just take it, because usually, I’m the first one to snap and break on the idiots when they’re being ass-clowns, but I maintained. I just laughed and told him that it probably pissed her off more that I didn’t take the bait and go off on her and did the whole smiling and “have a great night” routine instead of raising hell. He just chuckled and agreed with me.

And then I told him that he might want to tell our manager to expect a phone call complaining about me in the morning because I’m sure that this ignorant piece of garbage will probably be coming back and complaining about how “rude” I treated her and my “attitude”. But for once, I was totally chillin’ and kept it all calm, cool and professional. I hope that they save that tape because Lord knows when that will happen again.

And anyhow, that was my night last night. I went in feeling pretty good and happy to be back at the store and by the time the night was over, I was totally disgusted with the stupidity and crudeness. I’m still smiling though because I kept it cool and did it right. Yeah, I am “de’ man!”… lol

And that was my first night back at the work-hole. I really don’t like this whole “customer service” thing sometimes, but at least it never gets boring.

And now I’m going to go have breakfast. Have a great day.

Lizzie Borden and Gun Control (Among Other Things)

Okay, I just did something I never do and deleted (edited) the first three paragraphs of this post.  Some things should not be spoken of in public, not even by me.  I’ve got some personal issues with some persons that need to be addressed and rectified, but bitching and moaning here on my blogsite, before I’ve even attempted to address it with them, is not the answer.  So I wrote this – posted this – and came back and changed this.  This part anyhow.  I’m not a happy camper about some things and change is definitely in the air.  Whether it’s good or bad – well, that remains to be seen.  And now that my selective editing is over with, let’s proceed with the rest of this blog as previously written. Have a great day.

I think I need to change the subject if this thing is ever going to see the light of day. Let’s find something to write about that doesn’t involve my perpetual craziness or fucked up feelings. Maybe I should just reach into the “Magic Box”, left over from my two “Thirty Days” series, and pull out a topic or two to just ramble and rant about. Yeah, I think that’s exactly what I’ll do.

But first I want to make a quick comment about two different things that have been in the news lately (unless you watch MSNBC – they don’t cover actual news – they just live to insult and destroy anyone who dares to disagree with their Messiah, Obama). One thing is that crazy little country called North Korea, which has decided that they’re still at war with South Korea and also are threatening to attack the United States. I’m sure that Alan Alda has already made phone calls to Mike Farrell, Gary Burghoff, Jamie Farr and Loretta Swit salavating for a chance to do more M*A*S*H if this whole thing takes off again.

But anyhow, that crazy little guy that runs N. Korea is freakin’ nuts. I think he’s going to give his dear, departed daddy a run for the money in the whack-job department. And the Obamanites need to take him seriously because although he’s not fully capable of doing everything that he’s threatening, he can and will hurt a lot of people and cause trouble in his bid for attention and noteriety. It’s too bad that technically, our government isn’t allowed to order assasinations because that’s one freakizoid that deserves it.

I think that the President needs to send a special task force, consisting of Muppet Boy’s best friend Dennis Rodman, along with Nikki Minaj, Kayne West, Sean Penn, Michael Moore, Keith Olbermann and Snooki to meet with and deal with this loose cannon. And they can either convince him that he’s wrong and crazy and needs to settle down or else they can all vanish forever into the N. Korean prisons… and no one would give a damn. I know I wouldn’t.

Actually, maybe Snooki and Kim the younger could mate and make babies. Then Snooki could be a world leader? Hmmmmm!

And where I was actually going with all of that, which obviously is not where I ended up, I just really don’t know.

And now for the other topic I want to quickly jump on before I get to the meat of this whole thing. It’s about the new Pope. I didn’t get the job as is obvious since I’m here writing this and not sitting and chillaxin’ at the Vatican. But I’m not too upset. White outfits, funny hats and red shoes? I just can’t see it. That’s not my style at all. After all, everyone knows you don’t wear white this early in the year and as for red shoes, I’m not Dorothy and this isn’t OZ. I want to see that movie.

And no, that’s not what I was planning on talking about either, but I can’t for the life of me remember what I was originally going to say. My mind just went blank. It does that sometimes.

And don’t you like how I’ve basically just written an entire blog without actually saying anything of merit or importance. I’m just rambling here and filling space. I do that sometimes. Let’s go get the Magic Box and find a real topic so I can get this piece finished and go back to watching cheezy porn on the internet (want to come watch with me – cute guys can inbox me and we’ll discuss it… lol) and trolling on Facebook. Damn, I really do need to get a life.

So I’ve pulled out three topics and we’ve got “Gun Control”, “Lizzie Borden” and “Perception versus Reality”. These are all topics that I could really get into and go off about with long winded rants, but for the sake of time and space, I won’t do that today. I’m taking the “perception versus reality” topic right out of the picture because I don’t feel like doing that one right now. I think I already addressed that in the first few paragraphs anyhow with my comments (that may or may not stay here) that the perception is that things are great. The reality is they’re not. ‘Nuff said! Let’s tackle the other two.

Lizzie Borden – she took an ax and allegedly killed her father and step-mother, giving them “40 whacks” or so the old limerick goes. Truth is that Lizzie was accused of the crimes, but aquitted, found not guilty by a jury of her peers after police and prosecutors gave conflicting statements and couldn’t produce any evidence aside from theory. Her name and reputation were forever ruined though and she died years later, at age 66, forver ostracized by society and the community surrounding her Fall River, Massachusetts home.

Here’s the infamous Lizzie Borden limerick…

Lizzie Borden took an axe
And gave her mother forty whacks.
When she saw what she had done
She gave her father forty-one.

In truth, her mother was “whacked” either 18 or 19 times and her father was whacked only 11 times. But it makes a great rhyme, doesn’t it?

Let’s talk about gun control now. Some gun control and registration is necessary and valid. I understand that. But guns are not evil and bad and wrong no matter what some in Washington would have you believe. Guns are inanimate objects and can not hurt or harm anyone. It’s the person with the gun that is the problem. And 99.95% of gun owners are thoughtful, responsible, decent people. And these are the people that all of these new laws and regulations coming down from Washington are effecting. New guns laws are not going to make anyone safer. Because the problems are the criminals and idiots that get possession of guns that cause the problems and kill people. And they don’t give a damn about gun laws or regulations to begin with. That’s why they’re criminals and idiots.

No matter how many laws they add or put on the books, the simple facts are that if you really want a gun, for whatever reason, it’s not hard to get one. I can walk out of this house and be back in an hour with a gun… if that’s what I chose to do. And so can most anyone else with half a brain or some money. And that scares me. The bad guys can get guns, but if the good people want a gun to protect themselves and their families from these bad folks, that’s not acceptable and their hands are tied by legalities and stupid laws.

A background check is okay. Some restrictions are acceptable since we don’t want to see the neighborhood crazy out there stockpiling up their own personal militia and threatening their neighbors and community. But damn it all, the government needs to think first and use some common sense when making their rules and regulations. If a bad guy wants a gun, they’re going to get a gun. And if they have a gun, then I should be able to have a gun in my house as well to defend myself and my family if by some chance that bad guy comes knocking at my door.

It’s just that simple. I don’t have the answers, but I do know that the craziness that’s currently taking place, with everyone using isolated incidents such as the Sandy Hook Elementary School massacre or the Colorado theatre shootings to politicize their arguments is totally fucked up and wrong. Those were isolated incidents involving crazy nut-jobs and would have happened regardless of what kind of gun-laws are on the books in those regions. The murderers in each of those cases didn’t give a damn about the laws. They were crazies and people died as a result. And if the guns hadn’t been available to them, they would have just found another way. They were whackos and determined to kill and hurt people. The Unibomber didn’t use a gun and killed three people and injured many, many more. Timothy McVeigh killed 168 people and never used a gun. The 9/11 terrorist didn’t use guns – they used box cutters and airplanes and killed thousands.

And I’m losing my train of thought. Guns don’t kill people – people kill people. And I’d rather have a gun and never have to use it rather than not be allowed to have a gun because of some overzealous politicians and then, one day be shot or mained by some crazy because I wasn’t able to defend myself. Some gun control is acceptable, but common sense and simple logic need be to used as well. Just saying.

And I’m closing this up for now because I’m tired and bored and horny and just don’t give a damn. Yeah, it’s that kind of day. I’m out of here.

Ubuntu! Continue reading