Wrestling Fact Or Fiction: April 26, 2014

Tossing Salt Presents:  Wrestling Fact Or Fiction
April 26, 2014
Doug Maynard
 
Greetings and welcome to your favorite guilty pleasure, the one and only “Tossing Salt Presents:  Wrestling Fact Or Fiction”.  I’m Doug and as you probably have already noticed, I’m running extremely late this week.  A big promotion at my new job and with that promotion has come long hours, lots of on-call moments and very little free time to do the things I enjoy, like eat, sleep and write.  But it’s getting better and I’ll be back on track very soon.  But for now, I’m just doing what I can, when I can, as best I can. Just call me “Above Average”.  Hey Mike Sanders, eat your heart out, bro!
 
It’s time to do that “Wrestling Fact or Fiction” thing that everyone seems to enjoy so much. And I have predictions for the TNA Sacrifice pay-per-view coming up on Sunday as well.  With just those two things, it’s a full column all in itself, but I also have this little thing to start called…
 
Thoughts…
 
It’s come out that Vince Russo is still working for TNA as a consultant.  And Eric Bischoff, despite his claims to the contrary, is still technically under contract as well to TNA, although he’s not being used in any capacity.  I know everyone likes to hate on both Russo and Bischoff, but I don’t care.  Russo, when he has someone to censor and act as his filter, is a good idea man and could be a valuable person for TNA.  And Eric is a smart guy who knows TV production second to none.  I don’t want him in creative, but as a character if that’s what he chooses to do, and as a producer / director, he’s still a valuable hand to have around.  I hope that when his deal with TNA expires, we see him in some capacity at the WWE Network.  
 
The Shield versus Evolution in a War Games match? It really does need to happen.
 
Torito versus Hornswoggle in a “Sesame Street Fight”.  That needs to happen as well.
 
TNA may suck with their story-lines and their ratings are down big time as of late, but I read a few different recaps of Impact!  from Thursday night and they’re really putting on some great television matches in between all the B.S.  So the problem with TNA is NOT the wrestling or wrestlers.  So who does that leave?  Creative and Dixie?  Hmmmmm.
 
Hugh Jackman will be the “Guest Host” on RAW this upcoming Monday night.  That’s all well and good, but I want to know when the best “Guest Star” of all time for WWE RAW will be making his return to the ring.  Of course, I am talking about Kevin Federline.  I miss that guy.
 
Brie Bella versus Stephanie McMahon.  As each week progresses and the Authority versus Daniel Bryan story continues, you know this just has to happen.  It’s what’s best for business.
 
My condolences to WWE World Champion Daniel Bryan on the loss of his father earlier this week.  Thoughts and prayers to Bryan, his family and friends.  
 
Did you know that Paul Heyman’s client, Brock Lesnar beat the streak at Wrestlemania XXX?  Just figured I’d better let everyone know.  After all, Paul Heyman rarely mentions it.
 
I hate black jelly beans.
 
WWE needs to put their resident musical guru Jim Johnston together with Bray Wyatt and record a version of Wyatt singing his song, “He’s Got The Whole World In His Hands”. I smell top ten hit and big money.  WWE also needs to re-record and make a new video for “Land of 1000 Dances” with the current WWE roster.  Make it happen Vince.
 
Tony Atlas hates horses. He threatened to punch a horse on “Legend’s House”.  That reminded me of “Mongo” in the movie “Blazing Saddles”.
 
And that’s enough thinking. Let’s move on and do that infamous F&F thing called…
 
Wrestling Fact or Fiction…
 
As per the usual, the questions come from the sage minds over at 411mania.com/wrestling.  The answers come from the sage mind of me.  Let’s do this…
 
1. Steve Austin vs. Brock Lesnar is one of the few legit dream matches left in wrestling.
 
FICTION:  If this was a few years ago, it would be something to look forward to, but Austin has been out of the ring too long and while the build and promos would be great, the match would not be up to par.  Better to dream and speculate about this match and wonder what if instead of actually having the match and everyone being let down.
 
2. Bad News Barrett should not only win the IC Title Contender’s Tournament, but he should go on to win the IC Title.
 
FACT:  Barrett is a good in-ring performer and has a great presence.  He should have been pushed to the top and be in the top tier of WWE talent long before now, but it hasn’t happened. Now is his time and the IC title is a great place to start.
 
3. WWE did a great job of making you interested in Kane vs. Daniel Bryan with Raw’s opening segment.
 
FACT:  I’m a fan of Kane and with the return of “the mask” and Kane being the monster once more, I’m sure he’ll put out a great match. And Bryan is one of the best in the world. This is a great way to start off what hopefully will be a great and long reign for Bryan as the WWE World Champion.
 
4. You watched the debut episode of WWE Legend’s House and liked it.
 
FICTION:  I watched it and while I can’t say I hated it, I don’t think “liked” quite fits either. It’s got potential and possibility, but so far, it’s been kind of lame and boring. It’s a house full of retired and semi-retired old men so expecting a lot of action and energy probably isn’t the smartest thing to do, but they need to step it up a bit in the future episodes. Right now, it’s bearable, but not must-see.  With these names and talents, it should be both.  
 
5. While he may have shown interest by talking with Triple H, you have no desire to see Goldberg wrestle for WWE again.
 
FACT:  Goldberg needs to stay retired and out of the ring.  ‘Nuff said!
 
6. You are interested in this weekend’s TNA Sacrifice PPV.
 
FICTION:  There are a couple of matches I’m slightly interested in because of the people involved, but for the most part, as with most TNA shows, I can take it or leave it and usually just leave it.
 
7. Due to his injury history over the last few years, WWE should move on and stop using Christian as a full time in ring performer.
 
FACT:  It’s time to make that transition from in the ring to outside the ring as a manager and mentor.  Put Christian as the manager of Zack Ryder and Curt Hawkins, the former “Edgeheads”, and let that magic happen.
 
8. You are more likely to order ROH on live traditional PPV than you were when they were an iPPV product.
 
FICTION:  I rarely have time to watch what little wrestling I do get to watch with RAW and The Network.  Another product, even ROH, added to the mix would be just too much for me at this particular time, regardless of how they present their PPV’s.  It’s not the product – it’s just me.
 
And now that I’ve gotten that out of the way, TNA has a pay-per-view coming up on Sunday.  Let’s break out the Sister Cleo gear and the crystal ball.  It’s time.
 
Predictions – TNA Sacrifice 2014…
 
TNA World Heavyweight Championship 
Eric Young (c) vs. Magnus 
 
It’s too soon in the EY “not copying WWE experiment” to take the belt off of Eric.  Eric wins by pinfall and keeps the gold.
 
Winner and STILL Champion:  Eric Young
 
TNA Knockouts Championship 
Madison Rayne (c) vs. Angelina Love 
 
There will be some title changes at this show and since I don’t think that the main, World Championship will change hands, I’ll go out on a limb and take this title, the Knockouts Championship, to be the one that does change hands.  Look for some Beautiful People shenanigans and Angelina Love will walk out with that Knockouts title arround her waist.
 
Winner and NEW Knockouts Champion:  Angelina Love
 
Tables Match 
Bully Ray vs. Bobby Roode 
 
As much as I like Bobby Roode, this is a tables match and right up Bully Ray’s alley.  But then again, Roode’s on / off tag partner James Storm is in the house.  Bully’s former tag partner, Devon, isn’t with TNA anymore.  That means Bully is an island upon himself.  Beer Money reunites once again as Roode and Storm put Bully through the table.
 
Winner: Bobby Roode
 
“I Quit” match 
James Storm vs. Gunner
 
I can’t imagine either of these guys “quitting”, but I can imagine Storm and his on /off partner Bobby Roode beating Gunner until he can’t continue.  And I think that’s how it goes down.  Shenanigans by Roode and Storm and Gunner is ruled unable to continue.
 
Winner  James Storm
 
Kurt Angle and Willow vs. Ethan Carter III and Rockstar Spud 
 
Not even close here.  Angle and Willow win and win quickly…
 
Winners:  Kurt Angle and Willow
 
Match 3 of the Best of 3 Series for the TNA X Division Championship 
Sanada (c) vs. Tigre Uno 
 
I have no idea about either of these guys so I’ll just pick one at random.  Tiger Uno wins.  I like his name.
 
Winner and NEW TNA X-Division Champion:  Tiger Uno
 
“Committed Match” 
Mr. Anderson vs. Samuel Shaw 
 
It’s never fun in a match like this when the “heel” wins.  For a match with this kind of stipulation to work, the “heel” has to lose.  Samuel Shaw is the heel.  Thus, Mr. Anderson… Anderson wins.
 
Winner:  Mr. Anderson
 
3-on-2 Handicap match for the TNA World Tag Team Championship
The BroMans (Robbie E (c), Jessie Godderz (c) and DJ Z) vs. The Wolves (Eddie Edwards and Davey Richards) 
 
And finally, we get the 3 on 2 handicap match for the tag titles.  DJ Z gets pins and loses the titles for his partners, despite not being one of the champs.  Thus, the Wolves win the match, but the title?  Sounds like controversy, a held-up title and a rematch on Impact! to me..
 
Winners:  The Wolves
 
And there you go.  Am I right?  Am I wrong?  We’ll find out on Sunday at TNA Sacrifice, I guess. 
 
And with that, I’m through for the night.  Questions and comments can be sent to Doug28352@yahoo.com.  I’m on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/saltpalace and on Twitter at @doug28352.  Thanks for reading and I’ll be back next week with two new columns, “Tossing Salt – Worldwide News” and “Wrestling Fact or Fiction”.  I’m Doug and I am out of here.  Have a great weekend and take it sleazy.  
 
Ubuntu!
 
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Tossing Salt – Worldwide News: April 26, 2014

Tossing Salt – Worldwide News
April 26, 2014
Doug Maynard
 
Greetings and salutations and welcome to another edition of pro wrestling’s most eclectic column, the one and only “Tossing Salt – Worldwide News”.  Yes, I am running a few days late.  My apologies for that, but life has taken one of those crazy little turns that happen sometimes and my new job has gone from a nice little distraction to pay the bills to a time consuming beast that is trying to take over every waking moment of my existence.  It should smooth out as time goes by, but right now, things are nearly as crazy as The Iron Sheik on an alleged crack-binge.  Yeah, it’s been that bad.
 
So let’s play catch up while I’ve got a brief break from the insanity.  It’s time to put aside the responsibilities of the real world, if managing a Sweepstakes Parlor can be called that, and to jump head-first into the world of sports-entertainment, the craziness that we call professional wrestling.  In other words, let’s can the chit chat and get to work.  And we’ll start off with…
 
Thoughts…
 
Who else has watched Slam City on the WWE Network?  I didn’t have many expectations for these short animated segments, but then my best friend told me that my best buddy and two-year old nephew, Kayden, loves them. So I had to watch and guess what?  I like them too.  I’d like to see the WWE put together a package of 3-4 episodes and work out a network deal for Saturday morning television.  It’d be a perfect fit for Saturday morning television program and would be great for the kiddies to watch in between eating their Fruit Loops and watching the Scooby Doo cartoons.  Do they still make Scooby Doo cartoons?  Anyhow, the WWE has a hit with Slam City.  It’s too short to be offensive, too cute to be annoying and just good fun for wrestling fans of all ages.
 
I’m not quite as thrilled so far with the WWE Legends House show on the WWE Network.  We’re only two episodes into the season and the potential is there, but so far, it’s been kind of… boring.  I’m hoping things will pick up as time goes on, but who knows?  I think part of the problem is eight old retired performers.  Of the entire group, only “The Fink” works a regular schedule and job.  The rest are either retired or semi-retired and are a bit, shall we say lacking, in the energy and enthusiasm department.  Tony Atlas is a trip, but the majority of the cast is depressingly normal and a little too real.  Maybe if they add a few younger “superstars” and maybe mix it up with some Divas as well in the upcoming seasons, it’ll get better.  Right now, things are not quite there. Not yet.
 
The WWE has silently sent out a warning to current and former talent not to appear or talk to Nancy Grace or her producers.  I don’t blame WWE at all.  Nancy Grace is just a joke that makes Jerry Springer look like Walter Cronkite by comparison.  Does anyone remember who Walter Cronkite was?  But anyhow, I’m sure that Nancy will try and make herself into the victim here, proclaiming that “the WWE is picking on her for just doing her job”, but I don’t care.  Unless it’s a one-on-one visit by “Dr. D” David Shultz to give that shrew the “John Stossel” treatment.  Nah, Dr. D is too sweet and nice a guy and has slightly mellowed over the years. How about a quick visit to Nancy DisGrace by The Iron Sheik?  That would be fun to watch.
 
I hate to admit it, but the recent Hornswoggle – Torito feud is cool.  I want to see more interaction between the two.  And Hornswoggle as the “mascot” for 3MB?  Works for me as well.
 
Word is that “The Fallen Angel” Christopher Daniels is through with TNA and is now a free agent.  Doesn’t NXT need a new trainer?  And just on appearance alone, think about this.  Daniels as a new “Paul Heyman Guy”, teaming with Cesaro.  They all have that bald thing working for them as well. There’s a big money gimmick waiting there to be exploited. I know he’s slightly older than what the WWE is looking for in their new talent, but Daniels is good enough for a run with the big boys.  They really should give him a shot.  
 
I’ve also heard that there is some interest in the former TNA tag team, The Motor City Machine Guns (I’ve always hated that name), Alex Shelley and Chris Sabin by the WWE.  Both men are still young and have the talent necessary to make it in the WWE.  And if the WWE continues to give some focus and attention to the tag team division as they have for the past year, there’s a spot for these two former TNA standouts as well.  I’d love to see the rumors be true and the WWE bring these guys in.
 
Bring back “The Masterpiece” Chris Masters and Carlito.  
 
What’s up with all of the wrestling podcasts exploding all over the place as of late.  We’ve got Steve Austin, Chris Jericho, Jim Ross and Roddy Piper all now hosting their own shows.  It’s good listening most of the time and especially with Austin, you never really know what to expect.  Did you hear the news?  Austin supports “gay marriage”.  And he’s got Eric Bischoff coming up as a future guest.  That should be cool as well.  Jim Ross is plugging that he will soon be sitting down with former WCW Announcer Tony Schiavone.  That will be interesting to listen to considering the past heat with these two men.
 
And the best thing about all of these podcast that’s attracted attention as of late is Roddy Piper and Kevin Nash.  Piper and Nash had a great Twitter war last week over an infamous backstage incident from the old WCW days and the end result, Kevin Nash will be appearing on Piper’s podcast at a future day.  That should be an interesting sixty-plus minutes to listen to.
 
Speaking of Austin and his recent interview with Paul Heyman, they (Heyman and Austin) teased that maybe Austin would be willing to come back and wrestle against Heyman’s client, Brock Lesnar. Maybe if this was five or six years ago, I would be interested, but it’s all talk at this point.  Austin has nothing to prove and it wouldn’t be that great of a match, I don’t believe.  The hype would be great, but the match would suck.  It won’t happen.
 
But if Austin does ever decide to come back and do a match, how about Austin versus CM Punk at Wrestlemania 31?  Punk is capable of carrying Austin to a top level match and the promos would be great.  If you want to see Austin versus Punk at Wrestlemania 31, give me a hell yeah.  Or a double retirement match with Sting versus The Undertaker.  One match – one night – and both men, regardless of the match result, retire the next night on RAW.  
 
I’m talking too much so let’s move on to that Q&A part of the column…
 
Questions…
 
Karen Salay-Cumiskey:  Does anyone agree with me that when Hogan, Austin and The Rock were in the ring that Foley should have been there too?
 
Nope. Foley is a iconic figure in the world of pro wrestling and a true legend, but he’s not in the league of Hogan, Austin or The Rock.  The only other person I could see that was conspicious by his absence and would have fit in the opening segment with Austin, Rock and Hogan would be Shawn Michaels.  And since he allegedly has heat with Hogan and The Rock, that didn’t happen.  Flair would have been a possibility as well, but he’s tarnished his legacy so badly, I think he’s lost his standing as a character with the top stars of all time.  
 
Jacob Ray Santos:  Survivor Series 2014: Team Colter VS. Team Heyman. This could be an awesome idea WWE .
 
Anything that involves Heyman and Colter sounds great to me.  I’d love to see this happen at some point.  
 
Theron Mitchell:  Which jcp wrestler’s life and career would make a great movie? Who should play the lead and what should it be called?
 
The first name that came to mind for me was Ric Flair, but that movie has already been made with “The Wrestler” and I don’t think we like how it seems destined to end.  I’d rather see a happy ending or at least a more positive ending. Nikita Koloff’s career and life started out well, but the career, at least as a wrestler, ended with a big fizzle.  This is a harder question than I originally anticipated.  I think I’ll go with the life and career of Blackjack Mulligan.  From the Marines to the NFL to pro wrestling and classic runs in the AWA, Mid-Atlantic, World Class, Florida and WWF regions.  Then there was the brief stay in prison, the success of the children (Barry & Kendall Windham), the success of the grandkids (Bo Dallas, Bray Wyatt), the Hall of Fame, etc.  He’s had a great career and life and is still going strong as the patriarch of the Windham family. So my answer would be Blackjack Mulligan.  He would be played by Joaquin Phoenix.  If Phoenix can pull off playing Johnny Cash as well as he did, he should be able to do Blackjack Mulligan as well.   And the name of the movie would be called “True Lies and Alibis”.  And there you go.
 
Jay Mercer:  In 4 way tag with The Enforcers (Anderson and Zbyszko) versus The Fabulous Freebirds (Hayes, Roberts, Gordy) versus The Rock & Roll Express (Morton and Gibson) versus The Midnight Express (Eaton & Lane), who would win?
 
A match with talent like this could easily go any way and with any of these teams coming out on top.  The Freebirds would have the advantage of a third man outside the ring, as would the Midnight Express with Jim Cornette.  And The Enforcers are probably the most pure power and athletic wresting team in history.  It’s hard to make a call here, but I’m thinking it comes down to this.  Three “heel” teams and one “face” team with Ricky and Robert, the Rock & Roll Express.  Thus, Booking 101 says that the heels turn on each other and the face team, aka Ricky and Robert, sneak in and take advantage, snatching a win from the jaws of defeat.  So there you have it.  The winners would be Ricky and Robert, aka The Rock & Roll Express.
 
Ready for some words of wisdom?  It must be…
 
Quotable Quotes…
 
Bobby Heenan on the Rossati sisters: “The only thing they recognize is a buffet”
 
“I’m just like a giant candy cane, the ladies want to lick me all over.” — Scotty Anthony
 
“Whatcha gunna do when Hulkamanina and my 24″ pythons run wild on you?!?!?!!?” — Hulk Hogan
 
Bobby Heenan on Frankie (Koko’s bird): “If he was in my house, he’d be in a shake ‘n’ bake bag.”
 
“Take a one way trip down to Larry Land!” — Larry Zbyszko
 
And finally, let’s go that little thing that we call…
 
Who Am I?
 
Last week, I asked you this question…
 
I’m a former NFL star and ex-Marine who joined the ranks of professional wrestling in the late 60′s. I’ve had great success in all of the major federations as both a tag team wrestler and a singles star.  But despite all my success, the only title I never managed to get was a singles “World” Championship… However, my son did succeed where I failed and is a former World Champion.  I’m a multi-time NWA United States Champion and am famous for several of my long and bloody feuds with the likes of John Studd, Andre the Giant, Kevin Sullivan & Ric Flair.  For a while in the WWF, I was censored and the WWF would put a big “X” across the TV screen when I applied my finishing maneuver.  I also briefly hosted an interview segment.  I’m a Hall of Famer and two of my grandchildren are currently top stars for the WWE.  Who Am I?  
 
And of course, the answer was none other than the big man from Eagle Pass, Texas, the one and only Robert Windham, aka Blackjack Mulligan.  Correctly coming up with the right answer were:  Harold schwan, Lazaro M. Peralta, Kevin Haynes, Robert Buckley, Ryan Springer, Jason Vinduska, Michael Materacky, Chad Burttram and my former tag team partner, Russell Jackson.  Great job!
 
And now for the newbie…
 
I began my career in Florida in 1972 and had much success in the tag team ranks with a variety of partners. I also enjoyed some singles success as the NWA Junior Heavyweight Champion, a belt recognized in California and Florida and in New Japan, but not by the NWA as a whole. I eventually moved to Tennessee and found my niche as part of a fabulous tag team, a partnership that lasted nearly ten years until my partner decided he was more of a midnight type of guy.  I also moved on and reinvented myself as a tobacco spitting swamp man with a fondness for alligators.  I also clowned around a bit before heading back down south once more where I teamed with my former partner’s former partner and showed a little bad attitude.  After my in-ring career began to wind down, I opened a wrestling school in Florida and then eventually moved on to help train the NeXT generation of superstars, a role I hold today.  
 
Think you know the answer?  Please drop me a line via e-mail at Doug28352@yahoo.com and let me know your answer.  Or come visit me at Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/saltpalace and inbox your answer.  Add me as a friend while you’re there.  And I’m on Twitter at @doug28352.  
 
And I guess that’s it for now.  I still have a “Wrestling Fact or Fiction” column to write so I’ll go ahead and close this baby up and get to work on the next one.  I’m Doug and I am out of here.  Thank you for reading and I’ll catch you on the flip side.  Take it sleazy.
 
Ubuntu!
 
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Wrestling Fact Or Fiction: April 18, 2014

Tossing Salt Presents:  Wrestling Fact Or Fiction
April 18, 2014
Doug Maynard
 
Here we are back again with your Thursd… I mean “Friday” guilty pleasure, the one and only “Tossing Salt Presents:  Wrestling Fact Or Fiction.”  I meant to have this up yesterday, but between getting called into work on what was supposed to be a day off, plus fighting off a severe head cold, it just didn’t happen.  My apologies!  But I’m here today and I’m keeping it short and sweet.  In other words, time to can the chit chat and jump right to that answer and question thing called…
 
Question Time…
 
Tom Black:  If you could book a pay-per-view using only dead wrestlers, who would you use?  Wrestlers, referees, announcers, etc.
 
There is an old saying that if there’s a Rock & Roll Heaven, then you know they have one helluva band.  I guess the same could be said for pro wrestling. If there’s a wrestling heaven, you know that they would put on one helluva pay-per-view.  Let’s give this a shot.  I know I’ve probably forgotten many people, but I’m doing this on the fly so it is what it is.
 
For this event, I’d have Vince McMahon Sr., Fritz Von Erich and Eddie Graham share the promotion duties.  The referee duties would be split between Joey Marella, Mark Curtis and Pee Wee Anderson.  The interviewers would be Johnny Weaver and “The Nature Boy” Buddy Rogers.  And my announcers would be Gordon Solie and Gorilla Monsoon.
 
And for this big special event, we’d have ten matches listed, including a 36-Man Over The Top Battle Royal.  Here are the matches for this show.
 
“Macho Man” Randy Savage w/ Miss Elizabeth versus The Ultimate Warrior
 
Yokozuna and Owen Hart versus Eddie Guerrero and “The American Love Machine” Art Barr
 
Fatal 4-Way Tag Match:  Matt Borne & Buzz Sawyer versus Gino Hernandez & Chris Adams versus The Public Enemy versus David & Kerry Von Erich w/ Chris & Mike Von Erich in their corner.
 
Six Man Tag:  John Studd, Ernie Ladd and “Playboy” Buddy Rose w/ Sherri Martel versus Andre The Giant, Rick McGraw and S.D. Jones
 
Mr. Perfect Curt Hennig w/ Rick Rude versus The Big Bossman
 
The Fabulous Moolah & Mae Young versus Penny Banner & Luna Vachon
 
Special Managers Match:  Captain Lou Albano, Freddie Blassie, Paul Bearer & Arnold Skaaland w/ The Grand Wizard versus Gary Hart, Skandor Akbar, Sir Oliver Humperdink and Lord Alfred Hayes.
 
Flyin’ Brian Pillman & Chris Benoit w/ Woman versus  Dick Murdoch & Wahoo McDaniel
 
Six Man Tag:  “Dr. Death” Steve Williams, Terry Gordy & Bruiser Brody versus Dick The Bruiser, The Crusher & Ray “The Crippler” Stevens
 
36-Man Two Ring Over The Top Battle Royal:  Brad Armstrong, The Sheik, Eddie Gilbert, Crash Holly, Lance Cade, The Wall, Reid Flair, Brian “Crush” Adams, Kanyon, Jos LeDuc, Bam Bam Bigelow, Bobby Duncum Jr., The Renegade, “Earthquake” John Tenta, Chris Candido. The Missing Link, Adrian Adonis, The Mighty Igor, Swede Hanson, Mike Graham, Buddy Roberts, Rufus R. “Freight Train” Jones, Giant Baba, Jay Youngblood, Davey Boy Smith, Louie Spicolli, Loch Ness, El Gigante, Road Warrior Hawk, Gene Anderson, Hercules Hernandez, Junkyard Dog, Mike Awesome, Jack Brisco, Bad News Allen and “Mr Wrestling” Tim Woods.
 
And there you go.  From top to bottom, something for everyone and a show for the ages.  ‘Nuff said!
 
LeVar Bolden:  Who is the best wrestling family?
 
There are so many great wrestling families to choose from, such as The Von Erichs, The McMahons, The DiBiases’, The Andersons (kayfabe), The Grahams, The Harts, etc. But my two picks would be, in terms of personal favorites, The Windham Family (Blackjack Mulligan, Barry & Kendall Windham, Mike Rotundo, Bo Dallas, Bray Wyatt) and in terms of pure dominance and legacy, the Samoan Anoa’i family (The Samoans, Peter Miavia, The Rock, Rikishi, Yokozuna, The Usos and many, many others) definitely is at the top of the list.
 
Jerry Rivers:  Vince McMahon has put you in charge of the casting for Legends House and you can pick any 8 wrestling legends to be part of the cast, who would you pick?
 
Hulk Hogan, Nicole Bass, Juventud Guerrera, Lisa (Ivory) Moretti, The Sandman, Missy Hyatt, Disco Inferno and Mike Adamle.
 
Jacob Ray Santos:  Name 3 mid-carders and/or jobbers that you would have liked to or would still like to see a become a big name main eventer in the WWE. I’m going with Curtis Axel, Cesaro (Working his way out of mid-carder already) and Cody Rhodes.
 
I think Cesaro is well on his way to the main event so I won’t list him.  How about the obvious:  Zack Ryder, The Miz and Heath Slater.
 
Brendan Shields:  Who would get more heat in front a ECW crowd: Dixie Carter or Nancy Grace?
 
An ECW crowd would be hard on Dixie to be sure, but Nancy Grace would be torn a new one repeatedly again and again… and deserve every second of it.  Dixie would be okay after the show.  Grace? I would really doubt it.
 
And now, let’s do what we really came here to do and that’s the “Fact Or Fiction” part of the column.  As per usual, the questions come from my friends at 411mania.com/wrestling.  And the answers and responses?  Who knows where they come from. Somewhere deep inside that piece of gray matter I call “de brain”.  Let’s do this…
 
Wrestling Fact Or Fiction
 
1. The Undertaker is done as an in ring performer.
 
FICTION:  While time and injuries have taken their toll, I don’t think that we’ve seen Undertaker’s last match.  He’s still a relatively young man and I believe has a few good years left inside him with matches and appearances few and far between. Going out with a loss just doesn’t seem to be the right way to go and I believe we’ll see Taker get revenge (eventually) plus there’s that kid who used to work for WCW to think about.  Before this year is out, I think that the long anticipated Undertaker versus Sting match will happen as well.
 
2. Eric Young winning the TNA World Title was a cheap knockoff of Daniel Bryan’s WrestleMania 30 victory.
 
FACT:  I don’t know if TNA actually intended it as such, but that’s how it looks and perception is everything, especially in pro wrestling.  Young is a good performer, but to win the title out of the blue with no build as he did, just reeks of desperation by TNA, so what else are we supposed to think?
 
3. The tournament for a shot at the Intercontinental Title will lead to WWE actually reinvesting in that title.
 
FACT:  Maybe it’s wishful thinking, but I surely hope so.  With the combining of the two major titles into one (WWE and World into WWE World Championship), that leaves a big void in the WWE so far as what the superstars are trying to achieve.  The IC title (and the U.S. title for that matter) should be a natural goal for every WWE superstar to try to claim those #2 spots on the roster to help put themselves into contention for the big belt.  Titles, if used correctly, are big money and help generate interest for the fans.  I think that the WWE has finally realized this again and are headed in that direction with the secondary titles (and the tag titles) finally starting to get their just due.
 
4. WWE should be very concerned that Direct TV and DISH Network are dropping their PPVs.
 
FICTION:  At this point and time, with the Network, the WWE doesn’t NEED DirecTV or DISH.  Sure, it would be nice to get that additional few million dollars, but it’s not make or break for the WWE anymore and they know it.  It seems kind of dumb to me that DirecTV and Dish would give up that easy money though.  While it may not be as much as it was in the past, due to The Network, it’s still cash on the table and it just appears that DirecTV and Dish are throwing that money away.  I understand that they are a bit butt-hurt due to the WWE not needing them anymore, but WWE and their “special events” still mean money for all parties involved and ignoring that just isn’t “best for business” at all.
 
5. At this point, you have little to no interest in Sting signing with WWE.
 
FICTION:  I want to see Sting get that final run with the power of the WWE machine behind him.  He’s an icon and legend and the WWE is just where he needs to do now in the winding days of his career.  Plus, I still want to see Sting versus Undertaker.  It’ll probably suck ring-wise, but it has to happen and I want to see it.
 
6. TNA made the right move by signing James Storm to a contract extension.
 
FACT:  It’s a sinking ship and they need to keep whatever talents they can to try and survive.  Glad to see that Storm (and Gunner and Spud) have all got secure futures and a place on the long term TNA roster.  Right now, TNA can’t afford to lose any of their top talent.
 
7. WWE sending officials to aid the widow of the Ultimate Warrior is a classy and thoughtful move by the company.
 
FACT:  How can it be perceived as anything else, but thoughtful.  WWE isn’t always perfect or right, but in the end, they generally tend to do the right thing where their talents (and former talents) are involved.
 
8. You are interested in Jeff Jarrett’s Global Force Wrestling.
 
FACT:  Competition is good and let’s hope that Jarrett’s GFW is able to step up and give both TNA and the WWE a run for the money.  It’ll pick up the product and cause everyone to get better.  Plus, it gives the wrestlers another place to work and that’s always a plus as well.  I know we can never go back to the days where the product, at least in the United States, was divided into three major territories (NWA, WWF and AWA), but with this new addition by Jarrett and his backers, plus ROH moving into the pay-per-view market too, it should make for a good time for wrestling fans everywhere and wrestling in general.
 
And with that, I think it’s time to call it quits and put this baby to bed.  I’ve got things to do and people to call…. or I may just go back to bed.  My head is pounding.  Questions and comments can be sent to Doug28352@yahoo.com.  Visit me on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/saltpalace.  Follow me on Twitter at @doug28352.  Thank you for reading and I’ll see you on the flip side.  Have a great weekend.
 
Ubuntu!

Tossing Salt – Worldwide News: April 15, 2014

Tossing Salt – Worldwide News
April 15, 2014
Doug Maynard
 
Happy “Redistribute The Wealth” Day.  Have you paid your taxes yet?  Don’t make WWE Legend Irwin R. Schyster come visit you.  He may bring his brother-in-law and son with him, aka “The Widow Maker” and “Bray Wyatt”.  And you don’t want that to happen, do you?  Pay your taxes!
 
I’m Doug and welcome to a brand new edition of professional wrestling’s most eclectic column, going strong since 2002, the one and only “Tossing Salt – Worldwide News!”.  So how are you doing this fine and lovely Tuesday morning? Are you ready for some wrestling?  It’s been a wild and crazy week for the world of professional wrestling, but that’s all well and good because that’s how we like it.  The WWE had another strong showing last night with RAW and showed once more why it’s the #1 wrestl… I mean “sports-entertainment” show in the world today.  And RAW seems like a good place to start so…
 
WWE RAW (in 500 words or less)…
 
All the WWE Superstars are out to pay homage to the Ultimate Warrior and we get a great video package.  RIP Warrior.  Big E needs a challenger for the IC title. We’re getting a tournament.  RVD beats Alberto Del Rio with the five-star.  Good match.  Daniel Bryan isn’t here, but video from last week is available.  HHH and Steph talk to Batista and Orton.  HHH wants to get the band back together, but Dave and Randy tell him he’s on his own.  Rybaxel defeats The Rhodes Brothers.  We get some Bo-promo video.  Bo is coming.  Paige defeats Alicia Fox in a better than expected match.  We get a good match with Batista and Orton versus The Usos that ends in chaos when The Shield comes in and sends the two former WWE / World Champions fleeing.  Flashback as we see The Warrior beat Hulk Hogan for the WWF Championship.  Paul Heyman rubs in that Brock Lesnar beat “The Streak” and then leads Cesaro to an impressive win over Mark Henry in the IC Contender tournament.  HHH sends Brad Maddox to tell The Shield that they’re wrestling in the main event.  Alexander Rusev destroyed Xavier Woods and then beats up on R-Truth for good measure.  Sheamus defeats Jack Swagger, but sells a leg injury after the match.  WE THE PEOPLE needs some new people.  Damien Sandow talks… a lot.  Big Show listens and then knocks him out.  The Wyatt Family is here.  So is John Cena.  John has jokes.  Bray has truth.  We have a cage match challenged and accepted for Extreme Rules between the two men.  Bray sings and the fans appear impressed.  Fandango has a new dance partner in Layla and in a “blink and you missed it match”, the Dance Fever rejects defeat Santino and Emma.  Stephanie gives Kane a loving pep-talk as only she can do and Kane brings back the mask.  He’s back.  (Insert Jason / Friday the 13th theme here).  It’s “Warrior Week” on The Network.  Wade Barrett over Dolph Ziggler as the IC Contender tournament continues.  Here comes The Shield. They are wrestling 11 guys as Rybaxel, Del Rio, Barrett, 3MB, Fandango, Swagger, Titus O’Neil and Rusev all come out to play.  It’s OINGO BOINGO chaos and despite fighting hard, The Shield gets decimated.  Here comes HHH, Orton and Batista.  They pick up the pieces and in their own style, tell The Shield to “believe in Evolution”. The End.  And that’s how to recap a show.
 
Let’s move on to some thinking time and thoughts-in-motion.  
 
Thoughts…
 
Eric Young is the new TNA World Champion.  Really?  I guess Shark Boy had other things to do this week. What is TNA thinking?  No offense to EY, but that’s like the WWE giving their WWE World Championship to Heath Slater or Santino.  Actually, those two scenarios might be kind of fun.  Hmmmmm.
 
Vickie Guerrero is NOT gone from the WWE yet, despite the rumors.  Word is that she’s leaving soon, but don’t count the “Cougar” out yet.  I’ll miss her.
 
James Storm and Gunner have both re-signed with TNA.  Good for them.  Chris Sabin did not.  Nothing smarky to say here.  
 
Low Ki is back in TNA. I thought that he had retired from wrestling.  Or was that Kaval?  I always get those two confused.
 
I keep hearing that Victoria may be joining the WWE as a trainer for NXT.  Works for me as it puts my hopes for her to have “one last run” as the Divas Champion just that much closer to happening.  
 
Congratulations to Daniel Bryan and Bri Bella on their marriage.  Also congratulations to former WWE Diva Eve Torres.  I hate to admit it, but I miss her.
 
The WWE needs to give Darren Young a push.  He could be the Anti-Cena.  They look like brothers, but still.  Imagine this.  Cena is white – Young is black.  Cena is straight – Young is gay.  Cena wears jeans and t-shirts.  Young could coordinate his wardrobe and wear jeans / t-shirts of opposite colors of whatever Cena is wearing.  Just build on their uncanny resemblance and take it from there, much like the Patriot / Dark Patriot storylines from the territory days.  Just have Darren Young mocking and working as a parody of Cena, first as a tribute and then it gets serious as the “joke” becomes Cena’s “evil twin” and an actual problem.  
 
Yeah, ideas like the one above are what I come up with when I’m at work.
 
That was a good tribute to The Warrior last night on RAW.
 
I like the idea of tournaments to determine the top contenders for the title belts, such as the one taking place on RAW.  It makes the belts and titles seem more important and worth something than they usually do.
 
The WWE isn’t using the terms “pay-per-views” anymore.  Now it’s all “special events”.  What’s the old saying?  A rose by any other name?
 
Jeff Jarrett and Ian Rotton are having issues.  Ian didn’t have the money he owed Jeff.  Jeff allegedly slapped Ian’s son.  Karen and Jeff were allegedly drunk.  Ian’s allegedly an ass-clown.  Who needs writers and storylines when the reality is even better.  I wonder how this is going to play out.  It’ll probably just blow over because neither man really needs the hassles right now.
 
Let’s move on.  
 
While at work the other night, at H&L Sweepstakes on S. Main St. in Laurinburg, NC, at the site of the old Subs & Cream (cheap plug), I was thinking about insults and some of the great catch-phrases that are common and used only by wrestlers and wrestling fans.  And I decided to do a “Top Ten” list.  And here you go.
 
Top Ten Most Insulting Things To Call A Pro Wrestler…
 
10.  Jabroni
9.   Curtain Jerker
8.   Ham & Egger
7.   Egg Sucking Dog
6.   Ass-Clown
5.   B + Player
4.   Pencil Neck Geek
3.   Mark
2.   Filthy dirty disgusting skanky brutal bottom-feeding trash-bag hoe.
1.   Nancy Grace Fan
 
You know them.  You love them.  You find a way to use them in daily conversation.  It must be…
 
Quotable Quotes Part I…
 
“Walk along one day and do nothing wrong, play by the rules, be a good person, do everything right: it doesn’t guarantee anything.” – Owen Hart
 
“Paul Heyman could shit a better wrestling format in his sleep than Vince Russo and Ed Ferrara could do if they worked on it for twenty years.” – Jim Cornette
 
“When I die, I feel it won’t be from another’s sword but by the unstoppable heartbeat of dreams.” – Jake “The Snake” Roberts
 
“The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Vince Russo has been there in which case the grass is most likely dead.” – Jim Cornette
 
Are you ready for some Q&A?  Let’s do this…
 
Questions…
 
Juan Orlando Pabon:  Who you think was the right guy to end the Undertaker Wrestlemania streak??
 
I would have preferred to see the streak stay alive until Undertaker’s retirement, but if Taker and Vince wanted Brock to be the man, who am I to argue with them?  Brock was their choice so he’s the right guy.  ‘Nuff said!
 
Raphael Savino:  Out of all the wrestling announcers out there, who do you think will the next Jim Ross? Who do you miss that is no longer announcing?
 
There will never be another Jim Ross.  He’s like Gordon Solie, Bob Caudle, etc in that his style and personality were molded by his experience and years coming up in the business.  He’s one of a kind.  As for who I miss that is no longer announcing, Tony Schiavone was damn good when he was inspired in the early days.  His last few years on Nitro were less than great, but since he’s had a chance to be out of the business for a while and recharge, I’d love to see him have another run at the announce table.  And Scott Hudson was well on his way to being a top announcer.  He’d be great to have back in the business again as well.  And I miss Bobby Heenan and Larry Zbyszko as the color guys.  Heenan was one of a kind with the amazing one-liners and smart commentary.  And Zbyszko, he’s just a “Living Legend”.  What more needs to be said.
 
Lewis Bruthadarkness Lindsey Jr:  How do you feel now that Cesaro is being managed by Paul Heyman?
 
It’s a great move for Cesaro and Heyman and the future for this WWE Superstar is looking bigger and brighter than ever.
 
Bill Amadeo:  Could Buddy Landell had been the face of the franchise? Please explain why/why not.
 
Buddy was a talented guy in the ring, but he was too much into the partying and drugs to ever be taken seriously by the promoters.  He had talent, but to be the guy that the company builds and revolves around?  Nah, Buddy was mid-card at best and never advanced beyond that.
 
Roderick Alfred Dean Chan:  Who is your Sexiest JCP wrestler?
 
Ron Ritchie comes to mind.  Steve Muslin was cute and there was this kid named Keith Larson…. he was HOT!
 
Brendan Shields:  Zack Ryder was on RAW this past week and it got me thinking, could he be a big star or dare I say Main Eventer? I only ask because I don’t know much about him.
 
It would take some work, but Ryder has the ability and charisma.  He would just need to be totally repackaged and play it totally serious.  A manager like Heyman or even Zeb Colter would help too in order to give him credibility in his new role.  Just have him do a heel turn on a top star and hold his own.  How about John Cena since Ryder still owes his “friend” some payback for stealing his “girl” (Eve) and then ignoring him when he was down.  Ryder has potential, but he just needs the right story and push to make it work.
 
Jerry Jackson:  Which celebrity should go into the HOF next year? My picks would be Zeus (Tiny Lister Jr.) or David Arquette.
 
Cyndi Lauper is the most obvious pick for that role.  Another great pick would be Regis Philbin, who has been a strong wrestling fan and supporter for well over forty years and has always featured wrestlers on his shows as often as possible.  And later down the road, Dennis Rodman, Kevin Greene, Tiny Lister Jr. and Kevin Federline (remember his issues with John Cena) could be added to the list.
 
Matthew Divin:  If you could pick 4 announcers and managers in history of wrestling to pick their brain, who would you pick?
 
Four announcers that I’d love to speak to and pick their brains would be:  Tony Schiavone, Rich Landrum (NWA World Wide Wrestling), Larry Nelson (AWA) and Terry Garvin (USWA, Global).  Four managers would be Gary Hart, Sir Oliver Humperdink, Bobby Heenan and Skandor Akbar.  
 
Jason Guerrero:  Since Bret “the hitman” Hart and Shawn Michaels 1 hour *iron man* match, WWE has had one every 4-5 years, the last one was randy vs. cena in 2009. If YOU could book an iron man match THIS year, who would it be?????
 
Cesaro versus Dean Ambrose.  That would be great.
 
Moving on again…
 
Quotable Quotes Part II….
 
“If I’ve heard this saying once, I’ve heard it a thousand times – Everything happens for a reason. And it possibly does. I just haven’t found the reason that this all happened yet.” – Jerry Lawler
 
“I see a guy over here with a yellow shirt and a brown tie. I like it. It matches his teeth.” – Jim Cornette
 
“I got a busted head, so what, I had a busted head when I was born!” – Joe LeDuc
 
“I searched the world of wrestling and wrestling fans for intellect and I find nothing but ignorance, I search the commissions and officials for justice, and I find prejudices and biases.” – Larry Zbyszko
 
And finally…
 
Who Am I?
 
Last week, I asked this question.
 
I’m a second generation superstar who had moderate success as both a singles and tag team wrestler.  Early in my career, I teamed with a “mad dog” for much success and then went on to help break “the enforcer” into the world of wrestling super-stardom when we were a team.  I was a lumberjack of a man for a while and I’ve been called a maniac, but I experienced my greatest success when I quit being serious and just started acting like a clown.  Who Am I?
 
And of course, the answer was none other than Matt Borne.  Early in his career, he teamed with “Mad Dog” Buzz Sawyer, and then later, went on to form a successful tag team with a young future “Enforcer” named Arn Anderson in Georgia.  Borne wrestled in WCW as the character of Big Josh and had his last big run in the WWF as the original Doink the Clown.  
 
And correctly answering were:  Chad Burttram, Jack Crawford, Russell Jackson, Rodney Howard, Brian Johnson, Ken Parkman, Harold Schwan and the boss-man himself, Mr. Bob Magee.  Also, for last week, I accidentially missed the name of Mr. Andy Clarke, who correctly guessed the identity of Loch Ness.  Great job and much thanks to all of you.  Well done!  And now, for the newbie…
 
I’m a former NFL star and ex-Marine who joined the ranks of professional wrestling in the late 60’s.  I’ve had great success in all of the major federations as both a tag team wrestler and a singles star.  But despite all my success, the only title I never managed to get was a singles “World” Championship… However, my son did succeed where I failed and is a former World Champion.  I’m a multi-time NWA United States Champion and am famous for several of my long and bloody feuds with the likes of John Studd, Andre the Giant, Kevin Sullivan & Ric Flair.  For a while in the WWF, I was censored and the WWF would put a big “X” across the TV screen when I applied my finishing maneuver.  I also briefly hosted an interview segment.  I’m a Hall of Famer and two of my grandchildren are currently top stars for the WWE.  Who Am I?  
 
Think you know the answer?  Send your guesses to either my e-mail at Doug28352@yahoo.com or else come visit me at Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/saltpalace and inbox me.  Follow me on Twitter at @doug28352.  And I guess that’s all for today. I just glanced at the clock and I have things to do and people to see.  Thanks for reading.  I’m Doug and I’m out of here.  Have a good week and I’ll see you Thursday.
 
Ubuntu!
 
 

Tossing Salt RAW Recap – April 14, 2014

Tossing Salt RAW Recap
April 14, 2014
Doug Maynard
 
Welcome to Monday and it’s me, it’s me, it’s NOT DDP.  Dougie Fresh in the house!  Holla if you hear me!  Time to do that Monday Night RAW recap thing that I sometimes do, but not always.  This is not a traditional recap, so to speak.  There are many, many of those out there for your reading enjoyment.  Instead, I watch RAW and just ramble and write, recapping not only what is happening on the show, but whatever my thoughts happen to be at that particular moment.  And it’s not always on the wrestling I’m watching.  Just warning you.  Let’s go ahead and get this started.
 
Ultimate Warrior, aka “Warrior”, Jim Hellwig – REST IN PEACE!
 
Tonight’s show is supposed to be a tribute to the Warrior.  It’d be nice if Sting was to pop up at the end of the show, drop down from the rafters in full “Crow” make-up, not say a word, but just somehow acknowledge Warrior and give a bow or something to pay his respects.  And if there was some way to have CM Punk, who was a big Warrior fan and on good terms and friendly with the man himself, come pay tribute and show his respect… that would be awesome too.
 
Woo Woo Woo.  I hope we get a Ryder sighting tonight.  They need to put him and Christian together, either as a tag team or else have Ryder back teaming with his former partner, Curt Hawkins as a strong, solid tag team with Christian as their manager / mentor.  That would be a great way to get maximum use of three talents, two who are very underused and talented and one who is among the best in the business, but plagued as of late with injuries and may be on the downside of his career.  I’m talking major money and potential here.  Just saying.  
 
In case you’re wondering, I’m just killing time right now before RAW starts.  Follow The Buzzards!
 
Autopsy reports are out today and Warrior passed away due to a major heart attack.  It was NOT drugs or steroids.  Hey Nancy Grace, on behalf of all wrestling fans, choke on that, bitch!  You were WRONG! And you’re a piece of crap!  ‘Nuff said!
 
Tomorrow is April 15th.  Irwin R. Schyster wants to remind everyone, don’t forget to pay your taxes.  Or else!!!
 
All the WWE Superstars are on the ramp and most are wearing Warrior gear. A great video package for Warrior.  Nobody does video packages quite like the WWE Production team.  And we get the tolling of the ring bell ten times.  Very respectful and very cool.  Tonight is a celebration of the life of the Ultimate Warrior. It should be a great show.  Big Warrior chant by the wrestlers and the fans.  The man definitely made his mark and left a legacy behind.
 
Rematch tonight as The Usos fight Batista and Randy Orton.  The Authority will be confronting The Shield.  And we’re having an 8-Man tournament to determine the #1 Contender for Big E Langston (Cole said the last name, so I am too) and his Intercontinental Championship.  I hope that they have an underdog win and use this to put someone new in the spotlight.  They showed graphics of the matches to start, but I didn’t get a chance to read them.  I’d love to see 3MB (any of them), Zack Ryder or The Miz win and challenge for the IC title.  Of that whole group, only Miz has the slightest chance, but I can still hope.
 
Alberto Del Rio versus Rob Van Dam is the first match in the Intercontinental Championship Top Contender tournament.  Both RVD and ADR have three names.  Winner of this fights the winner of Mark Henry versus Cesaro.  That should be a good match.  I’m calling it now.  RVD versus Cesaro in the next round.  I like RVD, but compared to the rest of the WWE roster, he seems to move in slow motion and the other guys are forced to slow down their pace to work against him.  Big E is watching on the TV from the back. I wonder if he flips the channel and watches Duck Dynasty when the camera isn’t on him?  I remember back in the old days of the Monday Night Wars, I’d be watching Nitro and then flip to RAW during the commercials.  But of course, I had my VCR record both so I didn’t miss anything.  I’ve still got all of those tapes. Who needs the WWE Network.  All of the Monday night shows, plus Smackdown and Thunder (and HEAT and WCW Main Event).  I just wish I had labeled those tapes better.  Ooops!
 
I like these tournaments. They add prestige to the titles and make them look more respectible and credible.  That kick by RVD sucked!  All air!  But the follow-up worked pretty well.  These two have no chemistry together and this match isn’t all that.  They’re picking up the pace a bit though and trying to make it work.  RVD with the five-star frog splash and the pin.  I called this one right.  RVD moves on.  More matches to come.  Daniel Bryan isn’t here – he’s off on his honeymoon with Brie Bella. We take a look back at last week and Bryan’s celebration as the new WWE World Champion.  Bryan takes a beating from Evolution minus one, but add a Kane and gets some help from The Shield.  Yes! Yes! Yes!  That was a great segment.
 
We see HHH, Batista, Orton and Steph in the back.  They’re talking and I’m missing Ric Flair.  We go back to Summerslam 1988  It’s the Honky Tonk Man and here comes The Warrior.  A quick squash and Warrior becomes the NEW Intercontinental Champion.  A great moment to be sure.  A great Toys R Us commercial with Sheamus and Big E.  I want some new action figures and toys.  And NO, they’re NOT dolls.  They’re action figures.  And they’re cool!  Yes! Yes! Yes!  ‘Nuff said!
 
So far, my phone has not rang at all and I’ve gotten no texts at all and RAW has been on for a whole 32 minutes.  Whassup with dat?  I miss The Hurricane.  
 
Back to Evolution and they’re making plans.  They’re out to get The Shield.  HHH says that The Shield reminds him of them.  I think we’re having an Evolution reunion.  We want Flair!  We want Flair!  Batista and Orton tell HHH that he’s on his own and that The Shield are on his problem and not theirs.  Oops!  I smell swerve!  But for now, HHH and Steph don’t look happy.  Believe In The Shield!  And ghosts.  They’re real.  I know this!
 
Cody Rhodes and Goldust versus Ryback and Curtis Axel are next.  Goldust looks as good as ever.  This match has three great wrestlers in it.  And Ryback too.  I just can’t get into him.  But Rybaxel are a great team and if Paul Heyman had stuck with them, they’d be over a whole lot more.  They need a manager / mentor with them.  I wonder if they’re “Real Americans”.  A “Goldberg” chant.  Gotta love the WWE fans.  Actually, Ryback versus Scott Steiner would be more fun to watch then Ryback versus Goldberg.  At least that’s my opinion.  Cody almost missed that moonsault, but it still looked pretty.  Cody versus Booker T (in his prime) would be a great match to see.  Wow!  Ryback with that stiff clothesline to get the win.  That came out of nowhere, but damn, I was impressed.  “Shades of Stan Hansen” and all that jazz.  Coming this Thursday is the debut of “Legend’s House” on The Network. This show, I want to see!  Woo-hoo!
 
Bo Dallas is coming.  And the NEW Divas Champion, Paige, is here.  She looks a lot more confident that she did last week.  We see video from last week as AJ challenged Paige and ended up as a former Champion.  It’s Paige versus Alicia Fox in our token Divas match.  Damn, Alicia is looking good.  She’s been practicing.  Paige with the Submission and Alicia taps.  That was a combination Texas Cloverleaf and a surfboard and damn, that was pretty impressive.  
 
We go back to last week and Batista and Randy Orton destroyed The Usos.  This match could really make the Usos and take them to the next level.  Grape juice is good!  It’s not as good as a Pepsi, but my kidneys need a break (and I still need to go to the grocery store in the morning.)  Why would the Usos dance before this match.  They should be more serious since this is such a big match for them.  The Usos are wearing Warrior shirts and face paint too.  Very cool!  I don’t mind Orton and Batista as a tag team.  I just don’t like watching them as singles wrestlers. Usos attack early and clear the ring.  All Uso at the start and that’s how it should be.  Orton and Batista take over as the match goes on. I’d love to see a match with Orton and Batista versus The Anderson Brothers (Ole and Gene) in their primes.  Talk about smash-mouth brutality. 
The Shield is here and they attack Orton.  Orton is out of action and The Shield have Batista surrounded.  “Superman Punch” by Reigns and Batista is sent to the floor.  Orton and Batista flee and the “Hounds of Justice” stand tall.  Believe in The Shield.  
 
Coming up is Mark Henry versus Cesaro w/ Paul Heyman.  This is the match I want to see.  Highlights of Warrior versus Hogan for the WWF title at Wrestlemania at the Skydome.  Warrior beats Hogan and wins the title.  Another great moment.  We see Orton and Batista in the back. Here’s HHH and he says, “Told you!”.  Nice segment.
 
Here is Paul Heyman.  He puts over Brock Lesnar and brags about Brock beat the streak.  The fans hate Heyman.  We see some still pics from Wrestlemania XXX as Undertaker is alone after the match and Brock breaks the streak.  A loss to Brock immortalized The Undertaker.  Watch how fast they turn though when Heyman introduces Cesaro, his new “Paul Heyman Guy”.  It’s the “King of Swing!”.  I wonder how many times that we’ll see Mark Henry swing.  Mark Henry is still one of the baddest men in the business. I hope he works heel.  Henry and Cesaro as a tag team managed by Heyman?  That would be an awesome team too.  Cesaro is relentless with those uppercuts.  A slow paced match, as to be expected, but I’m liking it.  Cesaro wins and that was kind of anti-climatic. No swinging for Henry.  Damn!  Big E looks impressed by Cesaro.  I know I am.
 
HHH tells Brad Maddox to find the Shield and tell them they’re wrestling in the main event tonight.  No mention of who they’re wrestling.  Here comes Lana and Alexander Rusev. She reminds me of the German chick from G.L.O.W.  This gimmick, so far, just doesn’t do it for me. He looks like Ted Arcirdi.  He’s fighting Xavier Woods. It’s time for some veggies.  I smell squash!  And just like that, it’s over. R-Truth is here to save his buddy.  Lana pulls Rusev away and then it’s sneak-attack time.  Rusev kicks Truth and the fans shit all over the segment.  He won, but I don’t think anyone was impressed.  YAWN!  Coming up next is Sheamus versus Jack Swagger.  WE THE PEOPLE!
 
Another look at The Warrior as he fights Rick Rude in the cage at SummerSlam in 1990.  Another great memorable moment.  The cameras followed Daniel Bryan all week at Wrestlemania XXX and they have a feature on The Network about the new WWE World Champion.  I watched part of it a few days ago.  It’s good!  Now it’s Jack Swagger versus Sheamus.  Another IC Title Contender match.  I’m going to go with Swagger.  He won the title last night at a house show and then the decision was reversed.  The ref was probably an illegal alien.  WE THE PEOPLE!  Swagger is so damn underrated.  I think it will be Swagger versus Cesaro in the finals.  I’m calling it now.  
 
This is actually a pretty good match right now.  My BFF and hetero-life-mate just texted me. He thinks it’s going to be Cesaro and Swagger in the finals.  Great minds think alike.  I’ve trained him well.  Sheamus throws a sucky-ass clotheslines, but Swagger is selling it well.  I wonder if JBL can get Zeb a part-time job on FOX News as an analyst?  Hell, give him his own show right between Greta and O’Reilly.  That just looked bad as Sheamus dived into the ring and Swagger locked in the Patriot Lock.  Brogue Kick and Sheamus wins. What the…??  I guess both Kenneth and I were wrong.  That just ain’t right!  Sheamus is selling the ankle injury. Maybe we’ll see Swagger after all if Sheamus is “injured”.  Nah, I doubt it.  The Great White wins.  I am NOT happy.  I guess now we’ll see Swagger cost Cesaro his chance at the title and they’ll end up wrestling at Extreme Rules.  New prediction.  RVD will be fighting Big E at the pay-per-view, I mean “Special Event!”  And we’ll see Heyman fight Zeb, or at least their “guys” will fight.  And all of us wrestling fans will mark out and be happy.  Sounds like a plan to me.
 
Damien Sandow is talking. And here comes The Big Show.  Sandow will not stop talking. Show doesn’t look impressed with Sandow’s ranting and raving.  He wants to be touched.  Sandow is great on the mic and this is funny.  Sandow says he deserves it.  Can you see it coming?  Show is just standing there and listening.  Punch by Big Show and that’s it.  Sandow is out cold and Show walks to the back.  Was this even a match?  Ok, that was… interesting.  You’re welcome.  At least Sandow got a lot of TV time. Zack, Miz, JTG, Tyson Kidd and Disco Inferno are all so jealous.  
 
It’s the Wyatt Family.  We’re Next!  Nice little swerve on their usual intro.  Tomorrow night, it’s Jack Swagger versus The Big Show on the Main Event.  They’re in Birmingham, AL tonight. I have some friends that live near there.  And now, “we’re here”.  It’s Bray, Erik and Luke.  The Wyatt Family in the house.  I’ll bet Bray Wyatt pays his taxes. His daddy makes sure of that.  I want a sheep mask.  Bray is calling everyone a bunch of sheep, in his own unique way.  He’s different though. That’s an understatement if I’ve ever heard one. He’s never lied to us, but John Cena has made a career out of lying to everyone.  Bray has Cena right where he wants him and Cena just needs one push.  Bray isn’t ready to slay – he wants to play.  Bray calls out Cena.  And here he comes.  Cena is on the ramp with the mic.  Cena wants to have fun. He’s in goofy mood.  I hate it when he does this.  Cena has jokes.  And Cena has pictures.  Fun with photo-shopping.  Sister Abigail jokes.  Mom jokes. Baby Wyatt.  Bray breaks on Cena about his jokes.  Cena is ready to get serious.  Cena says that the tables are turned.  Cena says that Bray is nothing without the family.  At Extreme Rules, it’s Cena versus Wyatt inside a cage.  Wyatt likes the idea.  This is his world.  Bray singes and the fans are swaying and sing with him.  Applause and the segment ends.  Bray and his antics never get old.  Later tonight, The Shield takes on mystery opponents in the main event.  Maybe it’s The Freebirds?  Nah, Buddy Roberts and Terry Gordy are dead.  RIP.  I know who it is.  In the main event, it’s The Shield versus Three Count!  Maybe?  Guess we’ll have to wait and see.
 
Santino and Emma are here. And here comes Fandango and Layla. Who ever knew that Layla could dance. Fandango broke up with Summer Rae over Twitter.  Gotta love the 21rst century way of doing things.  It’s mixed tag action. So if Santino dressed like Santina, would he be wrestling Layla?  Emma with the Shades of Taijari tarantula, called the “Dilemma”.  How does Layla wrestle in that dress?  Very well I guess.  Layla just pinned Emma.  
 
Stephanie is in the back and dressing down Kane.  Kane apologizes, but to no avail.  Steph is in total bitch-mode.  Steph calls Kane weak and a shadow of what he used to be.  This is a Stephanie McMahon pep talk.  She wants to know what happened to Kane.  Kane stands up and stares at Steph before staring at his mask.  He picks up the mask and the fans cheer.  Kane says he’s going to send Daniel Bryan to the depths of hell.  Steph looks please and I guess the old Kane is back.  Big Red Machine / Monster Kane versus Bray Wyatt?  Wouldn’t that be fun to watch?  Maybe one day, but for now, I guess we get Kane versus Daniel Bryan and Kane versus The Shield first.  Works for me.  
 
I changed my mind.  It won’t be Three Count against The Shield.  That would be silly. It will be The Mulkey Brothers and Rocky King.  Mulkey-Mania forever!!  Whoo-hoo!  Or maybe not, but I’d mark out big time and I know you would too.  Admit it!  I admit it. I’m a Boliever.
 
It’s “Warrior Week” on The Network.  And we go back to last week and see the final appearance of The Warrior as he cut his promo to the live RAW audience.  It’s weird to watch now, especially since it all seems to  predict and reflect on what was to come less than 24 hours later.  Rest In Peace, Warrior.  
 
Bad News Barrett and Dolph Ziggler are the next up.  This should be a good match too.  That robe that Barrett is wearing makes him look like the Ruler of Sparta.  Very Romanesque.  Barrett tries to get a “Bad News” chant going.  It doesn’t work.  It would have in New Orleans. Dolph has one of the best dropkicks in the business. “Shades of Hardcore Holly” dropkick by Dolph.  Wade keeps control though. Wade is a throwback to the old-school look and style of wrestling.  He would have been perfect for the “Attitude Era” of wrestling.  He should be really big now, but alas, it’s not to be yet.  His day will come though.    CM Punk chant.  Haven’t heard one of those in a while.  Barrett hits “Wasteland” and Ziggler kicks out.  Dolph with the “Shades of Billy Gunn” Famouser for a two count.  Dolph with a superplex attempt which doesn’t work, but Dolph does hit with an X-Factor move from the corner.  Two count city and the fans are getting into it.  Wade with the “Bull Hammer” and the pin.  Dolph gets some bad news as Barrett takes home the win.  Next week, we get Cesaro versus RVD and Sheamus versus Barrett.
 
We get a video reminding us of who Kane is.  Isn’t it great how the WWE managed to put together a video less than an hour after Kane decided to reclaim his mask and become evil again.  That’s why they’re the best in the business.  And next, it’s The Shield.  Who are they wrestling?  How about Stevie Richards, Nova and The Blue Meanie?  Yeppers, I’m calling it now. “We’re Taking Over!”.  It’s the bWo.  Or maybe not!
 
On Smackdown on Friday, it’s Sheamus versus Batista.  I won’t be watching.  I have to work.  The Shield is here.  I hate those masks though.  They don’t need them, but I guess it’s merchandise to sell and make money for the WWE.  Capitalism at it’s best.  Good for them.  Alberto Del Rio is out. He’s their opponent?  Jack Swagger comes out next.  Fandango is next out.  We get the 3MB!  Hell yes!  Titus O’Neil is next.  Rybaxel are the next two out.  Alexander Rusev is the next man out.  Bad News Barrett is next.  It’s eleven on three.  It’s the “ultimate” handicap match.  “Lunatic Fringe” Dean Ambrose?  I like that nickname.   And it all breaks lose.  OINGO BOINGO time. The ref calls for the bell.  It’s a slaughter as everyone jumps on The Shield.  I guess karma is being a bitch.  Where are the other “good guys” to make the save?  And HHH, Randy Orton and Batista are here.  They’re coming to the ring to join in the fun.  It’s freakin’ Evolution!  HHH sends everyone to the back and it’s time for him and his partners to have their moment of fun.  Three-on-one beatdown on Rollins.  Reigns is up and  fights back but eats an RKO.  Batista-Bomb on Reigns. This reminds me so much of the old nWo beat-downs and attacks.  All we’re missing is spray-paint.  RKO for Rollins, followed by a Batista-Bomb. And Ambrose tries to fight back, but gets a Batista-Bomb as well.  HHH looks HHappy and taunts Roman Reigns.  Roman gets up and Orton / Batista hold him up while HHH says “Believe in Evolution” and delivers a pedigree.  Evolution stands tall with arms raised as the show ends.
 
And that’s it.  A damn good show.  No Sting, but no complaints either.  I keep hearing rumors of “War Games” being a part of Extreme Rising. Well, I think the seeds have been planted and that would be the right way to go.  The Shield and Daniel Bryan versus Evolution and Kane.  If you want to see this happen, give me a hell yeah!  HELL YEAH!
 
Match Results…
 
RVD beat Alberto Del Rio
Rybaxel defeated Cody Rhodes and Goldust
Paige defeated Alicia Fox
Randy Orton and Batista defeated The Usos by DQ when The Shield got involved.
Cesaro w/ Paul Heyman defeated Mark Henry
Alexander Rusev w/ Lana beat Xavier Woods.
Sheamus defeated Jack Swagger w/ Zeb Colter
Big Show knocked out Damien Sandow
Fandango and Layla beat Santino and Emma
Bad News Barrett beat Dolph Ziggler
The Shield beat Del Rio, 3MB, Rusev, Titus, Rybaxel, Swagger, Barrett and Fandango by DQ.
 
And with that, the show is over and so am I.  I have a column to go write for tomorrow. Have a great night and thanks for reading.  I’m Doug and I’m out of here. Take care!
 
Ubuntu!
 
 

Wrestling Fact Or Fiction – April 10, 2014

Wrestling Fact Or Fiction
April 10, 2014
Doug Maynard
 
Welcome to your Thursday morning guilty pleasure, the one and only “Tossing Salt Presents:  Wrestling Fact or Fiction!”.  I’m Doug and I’m your host with the most – welcome to the show.  
 
Before I get into the column, I just want to express my shock and send out my condolences to the friends and family and fans of Jim Hellwig, aka “Warrior”, aka “The Ultimate Warrior”.  I woke up this morning (Wednesday) and that was the first thing I found in my mailbox, a notice from a friend about Warrior’s passing. It’s so sad and crazy.  From The WWE Hall of Fame on Saturday to Wrestlemania XXX on Sunday to Monday Night RAW on Monday and he passes away on Tuesday.  It’s like the Warrior came full circle in his life and ended things on his terms and now, with absolute certainty, his legacy and memory will live forever.  Rest In Peace, Warrior!  And God bless!
 
Let’s do the column…
 
I didn’t do this on Monday when I wrote the “Tossing Salt” column, so I’ll do it here and now…
 
WWE Monday Night RAW (In 500 Words Or Less)
 
The “YES! Movement” lives as Daniel Bryan celebrates his WWE World Championship and two shiny belts.  HHH and Steph are NOT happy.  Mockery from the American Dragon. HHH will wrestle Bryan for the gold tonight!  Batista and Orton complain about HHH fighting Bryan instead of them.  HHH gives them a tag title shot against the Usos and teases an Evolution reunion.  The Wyatt Family defeated Sheamus, Big E and John Cena in a six-man tag.  This is definitely Wyatt country.  Bo Dallas will make a boleiver out of us all… coming soon.  Santino and Emma beat Fandango & Summer Rae.  Emma makes Summer tap and they celebrate in bad dance.  Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman are hre.  The ended the streak. Brock is “the one”.  It’s not bragging if you can back it up and they back it up.  Adam Rose and the “Exotic Express” is coming soon.  Batista and Randy Orton destroy the Usos.  Total slaughter!  RVD is back and takes down Damien Sandow.  You’re welcome… dude!  Wade Barrett squashes Rey Mysterio like a little jumping bug.  Alexander Rusev and Lana are here.  Zack Ryder’s last rezort gets squashed by the big man making his RAW wrestling debut.  The Ultimate Warrior plays dress up and has a flashback to many years ago as he comes to the ring and thanks the fans, Warrior Style.  AJ Lee and Tamina come out to gloat and brag and she channels some CM Punk with her promo. We get Paige from NXT.  She compliments AJ, but AJ is a crazy little lady dripped in psycho and challenges Paige to fight right there and AJ puts up the title.  Paige wins. New champion!  Hulk Hogan presents Cesaro the trophy for winning the Andre the Giant Battle Royal.  Zeb Colter takes the mic from Cesaro and calls the Swiss Superman a “Zeb Colter Guy”.  Cesaro corrects him and says that he’s a “Paul Heyman Guy”. Zeb is shocked. Paul Heyman is out and gloats.  Jack Swagger attacks from behind and destroys the trophy.  Cesaro sends Swagger and Zeb fleeing.  Match time and Cesaro beats Swagger by count-out when Swagger flees to avoid becoming a swinger. Stephanie tries to recruit The Shield to have HHH’s back in the title match, but Kane talks too much.  Daniel Bryan is waiting for his match with HHH when Orton and Batista make their presence felt.  Bryan eats an RKO, followed by a “Batista-Bomb!”. Kane is out and gives Bryan a choke-slam.  HHH is ready to wrestle, but the referee won’t start the match.  Here comes The Shield.  A face-off with HHH, Batista, Orton and Kane versus The Shield.  Oingo-Boingo time as Reigns spears HHH and levels Kane with the “Shades of Superman” punch.  Ambrose and Rollins take care of Ortona and Batista.  Bryan nails HHH with the running knee and Kane pulls HHH from the ring as the show ends.  The Shield and Daniel Bryan stand tall.  YES! YES! YES!  And that’s how to recap a show.
 
Moving on…
 
Thoughts…
 
I just realized something. There was no “Mr. Wrestlemania” Shawn Michaels at Wrestlemania XXX. Does he still get to keep the name?
 
I’ve heard a lot of good things about Paige.  Her first match on RAW wasn’t all that, but I’m expecting we’ll be seeing a whole lot more.
 
Christy Hemme is now part of the TNA Creative Team.  For some reason, when I think of Hemme, visions of great matches and future superstars are NOT the first things that pop into my head.  I still think of her eating a pie with her butt.  Gives a whole new meaning to the term “ass-munch”.
 
AJ was really channeling CM Punk in her promo on Monday night. The only thing missing was calling herself “the best in the world”.
 
Cesaro is a “Paul Heyman Guy”.  That’s pretty cool!  But why do I see an eventual “Paul Heyman versus Zeb Colter” match in our future.  Time to book that infamous “Tuxedo Match” between the managers.  And by the way, wouldn’t Christian make a good manager / mentor for someone?  How about The Edgeheads?  After all, what else do Zack and Curt have to do?
 
The Shield, Daniel Bryan, The Wyatt Family, all of the NXT folks – it’s the beginning of a new era for the WWE… and I’m glad to see it happen.
 
I’m still in shock over the end of “The Streak”. But I think that’s what they had in mind.
 
Jeff and Karen Jarrett have a new company.  I think Dixie should be very nervous right about now.
 
On a match for match basis, I think Wrestlemania XXX is one of the strongest and best ever.  
 
No Sting… yet!  But we did get RVD and a CM Punk chant.  So there you go.
 
The folks in New Orleans love them some Wyatt Family, don’t they?
 
Fandango broke up with Summer Rae via tweet.  Gotta love social media.
 
Vince McMahon leaving Wrestlemania XXX to go to the hospital with The Undertaker.  That is called respect!
 
Question Time…
 
O.J. Smith:  What 2 wrestlers could the wwe put together as a tag team and make them marketable and that there ego’s would not get in the way to boost the tag team division back like it was in the mid to late 90’s an the early 2000’s?
 
Who would make a great team to help boost the tag team division in the WWE?  How about reforming Miz and R-Truth together?  That would be a great team.  Curt Hawkins and Zack Ryder were a great team and could be so again.  It’s not like the WWE is doing anything with them anyhow.  Justin Gabriel and Tyson Kidd is another potential team that could work.  How about Mark Henry and Christian as two veterans out to prove a point?  There are so many talents in the WWE rarely being used that could be put together to create a strong tag team division.  WWE and their “creative writers and agents” need to look into this and tap into this wasted potential.  
 
Kathy B. Garger:  Ivan and Nikita Koloff – What are your thoughts on this duo?  
 
Ivan was the mentor and leader and one of the best wrestlers of ever of his era.  Nikita was the green power-house who just had the right look and presence about him and was able to turn that potential through hard work and effort into a great character and top wrestler.  I’ve always been a fan of Ivan and why he’s not yet in the WWE Hall of Fame is a mystery that needs to be rectified.  It’s a travesty and he deserves it far more than 99% of the persons already inducted.  As for Nikita, I appreciated his character, but was never really a big fan once he broke out into singles matches.  He looked good and did good work, especially when you consider his experience level at the time.  Still, he earned his success and paid his dues and I give him major kudos for that.
 
Robert Leartowicz:  Your thoughts on One Man Gang.
 
I liked the One Man Gang character and was able to watch him wrestle many times in his epic battles with Jimmy Valiant, as part of the House of Humperdink.  He moved well for a big man and could be quite a bit scary as he and Sir Oliver Humperdink did their thing in their attempts to put Valiant out and rule the Mid-Atlantic region. I did NOT like the Akeem character in the WWF.  That was stupid bordering on total dumb-ass and George Gray deserved far better. He got the gimmick over and that’s a testiment to the man himself and his abilities, but still… what the hell was WWF and Vince thinking?  Anyhow, a good character, a good in-ring talent, and from everything I’ve ever heard, a good guy in general.
 
Jacob Ray Santos:  Favorite wrestler not in the WWE: Hands down Kurt Angle.
 
Well, there’s a little tag team that used to be pretty prominent here on the NC Indy scene called “The Main Attraction”.  It was Chris Steele and Scott Powers and that team, along with their manager Jaysn Kross, were and are, among some of the best talents I’ve ever seen live. They belonged in the WWE or one of the major promotions and that would be my pick.  But since I’m guessing you’re asking about a talent that might have a little more name recognition, I’ll go with a guy that has long been one of my favorite “guilty pleasures” and belongs on the WWE stage as well in some capacity.  I’m talking about The Disco Inferno.  Remember, it’s your duty to shake your booty.
 
Shaun Sisk:  Who do you think pulled off the ECW reunion better: TNA or WWE?
 
When the WWE did the ECW One Night Stand pay-per-view in 2005, they set the bar and standards for wrestling reunion shows.  It was the best then and the best since.  TNA’s effort was okay, but wasn’t really any comparison to the WWE’s product. WWE all the way.
 
James Ryder:  Was Vince McMahon right to pick Shawn Michaels over Bret Hart in the 90’s? Who would you have gone with?
 
If you put both Shawn and Bret together at that time and looked at the potential upside to their characters and who was best able to carry the company, I think it’s prety obvious that in long range planning, Shawn was the best option and choice for the company. Vince was wrong in the way he handled it, but he made the right choice for his company and if I was in his place, I’d have made the same choice as well and gone with Shawn.
 
Jared Jackson-Ferrans:  What’s the most disrespectful WWE gimmick of all time?
 
I’m not sure if you’d consider it a gimmick or not, but when Vince McMahon mocked God and had God listed as HBK’s tag team partner against him and Shane, that was just totally wrong in my eyes and extremely disrespectful.  
 
And finally…
 
Wrestling Fact Or Fiction…
 
As usual, the questions come from my friends at 411mania.com/wrestling.  The answers come from me.  And away we go.
 
1. Brock Lesnar was the right man to end the Undertaker’s WrestleMania streak.
 
FICTION:  It’s hard to disagree with this since it was obviously Undertaker’s call and he made the choice, but breaking “the streak” is a career defining moment and I would have rather seen it going to to up-and-coming talent who could use it to build a career and legacy and lead the WWE for the next ten-plus years rather than a part-timer. Brock is a legit monster and it’s believable, but I’m just under the mindset that the streak should never have been broken.  That’s just me, I guess.
 
2. Triple H vs. Daniel Bryan was the best match at WrestleMania 30.
 
FACT:  Say all you want about HHH “squashing talent”, but he and Bryan put on a helluva match to start the show and while there wasn’t a bad match at the show this year, save perhaps the Outlaws & Kane getting buried by The Shield, the match with HHH and Bryan definitely set the bar for the rest of the night and everyone else had to step up and did a great job keeping up.
 
3. Bryan Wyatt shouldn’t have lost to John Cena.
 
FACT:  Cena doesn’t need to win and it would have been a great moment for Bray Wyatt.  But it didn’t appear to hurt Wyatt at all so things are all still sunny in the land of milk and honey. Looking forward to this feud going on a while and seeing where it all leads.
 
4. Hulk Hogan, Steve Austin and The Rock opening the show at WrestleMania 30 was a great moment.
 
FACT:  It was the perfect way to start the show.  We expected Hogan, but The Rock and Stone Cold were great surprises and it made a magical Wrestlemania moment for us all to enjoy.
 
5. Before, during and after the match – Paul Heyman was the star of the Brock Lesnar vs. Undertaker feud.
 
FACT:  Brock and Taker did their parts to be sure, but the build was lacking for the most part with the exception of the great promo work by Paul Heyman.  He built the anticipation, created the magic that made people say, “I have to see this!”.  Heyman is the best talker in WWE today and with his promos building this match, not to mention his promos on Monday with Brock bragging about the end of the streak and then less than an hour later, welcoming Cesaro as a “Paul Heyman guy”, he had proven it again and again.
 
6. You want to see a Shield vs. Evolution feud.
 
FICTION:  No doubt that this would be an awesome feud, but the time of Evolution has passed. HHH should not be wrestling on a regular basis and Batista and Orton should be working their own agendas of going after Daniel Bryan and the WWE World Championship rather than being boggled down in some gang-warfare.  However, if this potential feud with The Shield and Evolution leads to the return of “War Games: The Match Beyond”, I could easily change my mind.
 
7. Considering WrestleMania was part of the package, WWE should be concerned that they only have 667,287 subscribers for the WWE Network.
 
FICTION:  When you take into consideration that The Network is only available in the United States, that’s a great number and well on the way, once it goes international, to breaking a million subscribers.  No worries here – things are right on track.
 
8. Following the events of WrestleMania and Raw the night after, you are more excited for the WWE product than you have been in a long time.
 
FACT:  The matches are great, the stories are making sense and we’re getting a lot of hot new talent from NXT to shore things up.  Things in the WWE are looking good and I’m happy and excited to see where it all goes from here.  
 
And there you go.  Thanks for reading.  Questions, comments and dirty jokes can be sent to Doug28352@yahoo.com or visit me at my Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/saltpalace. Follow me on Twitter at @doug28352.  And with that, I’m putting baby to bed.  Have a great weekend and take it sleazy!
 
Ubuntu!

Tossing Salt – Worldwide News: April 7, 2014

Tossing Salt – Worldwide News
April 7, 2014
Doug Maynard
 
Well, here we are.  It’s Monday afternoon and I’m running a day early with the latest edition of pro wrestling’s most eclectic column, the one and only “Tossing Salt – Worldwide News”.  Usually, this is the Tuesday afternoon guilty pleasure, but there is so much happening and my personal schedule has gotten so crazy, I decided to go ahead and jump the gun a bit and write today instead of tomorrow.  It’s been one helluva weekend with the Hall of Fame Ceremony and then Wrestlemania XXX yesterday.  The Streak is over.  I’m still in shock over that.  And to Brock Lesnar?  Oh vey, but that’s allegedly what Taker wanted to do so how can we complain.  Let’s just jump right to the column, shall we?  I’m Doug, God is great, beer is good and people…. they crazy!  ‘Nuff said!  Let’s do this…
 
Thoughts…
 
Ezekiel Jackson announced on Instagram today that his contract with the WWE expired yesterday and he is moving on from the WWE.  A decent talent who had a lot of potential, I’m surprised to see him go.  But he’s been out of action for more than a year due to injuries so I guess it’s not a total surprise.  Good luck to the final WWECW Champion and best of luck in the future.  
 
After last night I’m positive that Cesaro will be a future WWE Champion one day.
 
Jeff Jarrett came out today and posted a press release announcing a new wrestling company called Global Force Wrestling.  More news is to follow, but it looks as if Vince and Dixie have a new player in their yard.  Vince won’t be sweating it, but I think Dixie should be very nervous right about now.
 
Heard rumors that Vickie Guerrero may be leaving the company after this week. I hope not.  There’s something about that woman and her “Excuse Me’s” that I’ve always liked.
 
AJ won the Vickie Guerrero Invitational and retained her title, but the star of that match was Tamina.  I think her time is now.
 
I wasn’t expecting too much from Wrestlemania XXX or the Hall of Fame this year, but the HOF ceremonies were entertaining (and we found out Mr. T loves his mama) and the big show, Wrestlemania, delivered from start to finish. Damn good matches from Cena / Wyatt, HHH / Bryan and the triple-threat main event.  And the streak ended!  I still have a hard time accepting that.
 
So we get Sting and RVD tonight on RAW?  One can only hope.
 
Hulk Hogan, Steve Austin and The Rock = AWESOME!
 
Congratulations to everyone in the WWE for last night.  The right people won in almost all the matches and even the filler was better than expected and entertained.  
 
Conspicuous by his absence last night was Christian, who was forced to miss the Battle Royal due to concussion suffered a few weeks ago.  That sucks big time for Captain Charisma, but I think his body might be telling him something. How about Christian as a manager though?  That would be pretty awesome and would add at least ten more years to his career.  Hmmmmm..
 
I’m pretty confident that most of you watched both the Hall of Fame Ceremony on Saturday night and Wrestlemania XXX last night, but just in case you didn’t, here’s a couple of cliff-note style recaps, just to keep you in the know…
 
WWE Hall of Fame Ceremony (In 500 Words or Less)
 
It’s the Class of 2014 Induction Ceremony.  Jerry Lawler is the host.  All Hail The King.  Trish Stratus is here and she “stratusfies” as she inducts her bestie, Lita.  Lita talks for a long time about Mexico, Rey Mysterio, Arn Anderson and many other things. She give Double-A and Rey each a beer.  Lita talks about punk music and follow the dreams, etc.  Next up is Diamond Dallas Page.  Mr. Positive is in the house. Some memories about the days gone by and he brings out Jake “The Snake” Roberts.  Jake speaks from the heart, good and bad, and there isn’t a dry face in the house. I was crying.  Best Hall of Fame moment ever.  Hornswoggle and Torito. Really?  Lawler gets gored. Really?  “Mean Gene” introduces Mr. T’s son, T Jr.  And then we get Mr. T.  He loves his mama!  Kane is out next and with a great speech, talks about William Moody, aka Paul Bearer. Moody’s sons accept in his honor. We get a kayfabe moment of tribute from The Undertaker for his fallen mentor and friend.  Kevin Nash is here and he’s emotional. He shares some Kliq memories and introduces “The Bad Guy”, Razor Ramon.  We get Scott Hall and he’s looking great.  Short and sweet, Scott says that “Bad times don’t last, but Bad Guys do!”.  Here comes HHH, Nash, HBK and X-Pac. It’s a Kliq reunion.Bad News Barrett is here.  He had bad news.  Cody Rhodes gives him a one-man standing ovation.  Next up are the Colon family, Primo, Epico and Carlito. Carlito gets in some shots at the WWE, saying that they need a buffer between the Kliq and The Ultimate Warrior so send out the Colons.  Also comments about “follow the Kliq and their time gets cut.  It’s like he never left!”.  OUCH!  They talk about their father (and Uncle) Carlos Colon and he comes out with a nice little speech, mostly in Spanish to thank the WWE Universe and the fans.  Linda McMahon comes out and has a nice introduction for the Ultimate Warrior. While sugar-coating things a bit, she admits that Warrior was not always the easiest person to deal with.  Warrior comes out and speaks coherently. Surprise!  After a subtle, yet friendly shot at DDP Yoga, Warrior talks about coming up in the business and “the boys” and takes some time to attempt to dispel some of the stories and claims about him.  He puts over the crew and people behind the scenes and some of his experiences with the WWE.  He says that the DVD was wrong and it hurt, but he’s past it and proud to be back and part of the WWE family.  More good vibes and Warrior thanks the fans and says to enjoy Wrestlemania XXX.  The End!
 
And…
 
Wrestlemania XXX (In 500 Words or Less)
 
Pre-Show Match:  THe Usos defeated Los Matadores, Rybaxel and The Real Americans in an elimination Fatal 4-Way to retain the tag team titles.  Bad blood and problems with Real Americans.  Swagger blames Cesaro and we see the Patriot Lock.  Zeb tries to keep the peace.  Cesaro turns Swagger into a swinger.  The end of the Real Americans?  Looks like it.  WE THE PEOPLE!  It’s the Hulkster, brutha!  Austin 3:16 in the house!  Can you smell what the Rock is cooking!  They’re in the SuperDome and starting the show.  HHH versus Daniel Bryan.  Awesome match that sees both men getting in their moves.  HHH dominates, but Bryan kicks out of pedigree.  Running knee and Bryan is headed towards the main event.  Steph show her butt and slaps Bryan.  HHH is pissed and it’s after the match ambush time.  Nothing like a sore loser.  Great match to start the show.  Squash TIme!  The Shield defeat Kane and The New Age Outlaws when the Outlaws eat a Trifecta Power-Bomb and Mr. Ass gets his ass pinned.  Andre The Giant Memorial Battle Royal. Everyone comes to play.  Cesaro takes out Big Show with huge feat of strength and slam over the top to win. The Swiss Superman is hot tonight!  A great match with Cena versus Bray Wyatt that does what it’s supposed to do.  Bray gets more cheers than Cena and leads the fans in a sing-a-long.  He’s got the whole world in his hands… lol.  Cena wins with the AA.  Wyatt looks creepy and awesome as ever and the loss will only make him stronger.  So far, a great show.  The WWE HOF Class of 2014 comes out and takes a bow.  The Beast versus The Streak.  History is made and the 75,000 in the audience are shocked as Brock Lesnar defeats Undertaker and beats the streak.  I was speechless.  DAMN!  AJ Lee wins the Vickie Guerrero Invitational and keeps her Divas Championship. It was a cluster-f*ck, but better than I was expecting it to be.  Vickie is NOT a happy camper.  Main event time.  A great match with Randy Orton, Batista and Daniel Bryan.  Bryan locks in a “Yes-Lock” on Orton. Here is HHH and Steph.  HHH pulls out the referee.  Scott Armstrong is the new ref, but Bryan takes time to kick him in the face and does the suicide dive on HHH, Steph and Armstrong.  HHH with the HHHammer, but Bryan gets it and lays out HHH.  Teamwork by Batista and Orton as they do a power-bomb / RKO combo on Bryan on the announce table. Looks like Orton hit his back on a moniter.  OUCH!  Batista turns on Orton and the teamwork is over.  Bryan manages to re-enter the match after refusing to be stretchered to the back.  Great back and forth for everyone. Bryan manages to lock in the “Yes-Lock” on Batista and Batista taps.  New Champion.  Yes! Yes! Yes!  Confetti falls and the “Yes Movement!” is alive and in full celebration mode. The End!  And there you go.
 
Say what?…
 
Quotable Quotes Part I…
 
“Do you know who I am? You probably don’t. But you will. See, only the cool people know me. Know Carlito Caribbean Cool. I doubt that many of you out there are that cool. You probably ask yourself, “Hey, how did that Carlito become so cool?” It’s simple. I was born this way. And when I come to the WWE, maybe I’ll give you lessons on how to be cool. Cool like me – Carlito Caribbean Cool.”  ~ Carlito Caribbean Cool – September 2004 ~
 
“It’s your duty to shake your booty!”  ~ Disco Inferno ~
 
“Scott Hall was offering driving lessons recently and the only one to apply was Juventud Guerrera”  ~ Bobby Heenan ~
 
“Listen to what I have to say.  Ric Flair is the greatest champion of all time.  As for me, I am a champion… only because I have some big shoes to fill!”  ~ Sting (after beating Ric Flair for the NWA title on July 7, 1990) ~
 
You want answers?  I have them.  It’s…
 
Question Time…
 
Yung Skip:  Who are your top 10 Favorite WWE Superstars?
 
Of the current roster, in no particular order, it would be Cesaro, Zack Ryder, William Regal, Heath Slater, Zeb Colter, The Miz, Bray Wyatt, Paul Heyman, Curtis Axel and CM Punk (technically, he’s still part of the roster and under contract).
 
Shaun Sisk:  During the Monday Night Wars were you the Nitro fan or Raw fan?
 
WCW and Monday Nitro all the way.  I would set the VCR to record RAW and then the Nitro replay every Monday.  I’d watch Nitro live and then watch RAW the next morning or whenever I had time over the next few days.  
 
Jacob Ray Santos:  In your opinion, who is the best wrestler that:  A. Jumped ship from WWE to TNA and B. Jumped ship from TNA to WWE.
 
That left the WWE to go to TNA?  It would have to be Kurt Angle. As for moving from TNA to the WWE, Christian.  I know he was just returning home after a couple of years in TNA, but he still made the switch and he’s one of the most talented, if not under-rated men in wrestling today.
 
Lenny Len Len Liriano:  What is the lamest wrestling move in your opinion? I’m gonna go with the Cobra.
 
The Cobra, The People’s Elbow, The Worm, The Khali-chop to the head, etc.  Take your pick.
 
Daniel Abel:  What is your number one dream match? I wanna see Kurt Angle vs Daniel Bryan.
 
A “Best of Seven” series with Cesaro versus Dean Ambrose for the United States Championship.
 
Camakia Shontelle Johnson:  If you could pick two female wrestlers for the female version of the apa, who would they be and why?
 
Beth Phoenix and Victoria (Tara).  As for why, they’re both powerful enough and big enough to be intimidating to anyone, girls or guys alike.  Plus they both have reputations and images that would fit the role of “enforcers” very well.  And if Beth didn’t want to come back to the WWE due to her new “Mommy” duties, how about Victoria and Tamina Snuka together.  They’d be perfect and it’d be a great gig for both of them as Victoria rides out the last few years of her career and Tamina just really starts to hit her prime.  
 
Jackson Moone:  If Jerry Lawler was to leave the WWE, who should take his place on RAW? How about hosting the Hall of Fame Ceremony?
 
If anything was to happen to Lawler, I would promote William Regal up from NXT and put him in the spot next to JBL and Michael Cole on RAW. As for the hosting duties for the Hall of Fame Ceremony, Mick Foley would be fine for that role.  WIlliam Regal (again) would be great in that spot.  Or they could just let Michael P.S. Hayes have it and let the craziness and chaos begin.
 
Curtis Wilson:  This should be interesting…what JCP talent do feel was the most screwed over by the WWF when they jumped ship and who if anyone was better for switching?
 
As for being screwed over the most by moving to the WWF, I think One Man Gang becoming Akeem the African Dream, Terry Taylor as “The Red Rooster”, and of course, Dusty with the whole polka-dots character are the ones that come to mind first.  Who was better off?  I can’t really think of any JCP talent that ended up with a better deal in the WWF, but if you go outside the Crockett era, many come to mind.  How about Kevin Nash going from “Vinnie Vegas” to “Diesel”.  HHH went from “Terra Ryzing” in WCW to “Hunter Hearst Helmsley” and we all know how that’s worked for him.  Steve Austin went from “Stunning Steve” to “Stone Cold”.  So it was a mixed bag going to the WWF for some stars and a roll of the dice.  Sometimes, you lucked out and the character worked and other times, you hit craps.
 
Martin Jertle:  Who will be next year’s WWE Hall of Fame inductees?
 
If I was in charge of the Hall of Fame and selecting the Inductees for the Class of 2015, my picks would be Macho Man Randy Savage and Miss Elizabeth, The Fabulous Freebirds, Ivan Koloff, Cyndi Lauper (Celebrity Wing), The Midnight Express (Eaton, Condrey, Lane) w/ Jim Cornette, Madusa and JBL.
 
Speak… Rinse…  Repeat…
 
Quotable Quotes Part II…
 
“Don’t tell me what I’m saying! You want to ask me what I’m saying, I’ll tell you what I’m saying! Don’t tell me what I’m saying!” – Vince McMahon
 
“DDP while your in the hospital screaming in pain, your wife will be on her back screaming my name” – Scott Steiner at Superbrawl IX
 
“Not much upstairs, but what a staircase!!” – Jerry Lawler, referring to Debra McMichael
 
“Next time say excuse me BITCH!” – Big Boss Man to Terri Runnels
 
“Hey Rock! At Summerslam, do you want to know what your role will be? I’m gonna make you my bitch!” – HHH
 
“Lets all give a round of applause to the Rock because well….he has my belt. Hell while we’re at it, lets all give me a hand cause…..I got his money! – Mankind
 
“Wendi Richter is getting soft, and it’s all because of this rock and roll nonsense she’s involved with!” ~ Fabulous Moolah – June 1985 ~
 
Feel like playing a game?  No, I’m not talking about HHH. I’m talking about the…
 
Who Am I?
 
Last week, I asked you this question.  I began wrestling in my home country of Great Britain in 1967, first under my real name and then using the name of a famous American wrestler with who I shared a similar stature and build.  But that name was soon modified and I began to establish an identity of my own.  I was a tag team partner with one of Britain’s biggest (and I mean that literally) stars, but when we broke up and he turned face, we had a feud that lasted for years until his retirement in 1993.  Though I mainly remained in England, I also worked for a while for Stu Hart’s Stampede Wrestling and in Germany and Australia as well.  My one main claim to fame in the United States was when I came to Atlanta and joined Kevin Sullivan’s faction for a short time, aiding him in his efforts to end Hulkamania.  I wrestled then not under my more established identity, but instead was named after a mysterious, some say mythical, legend.  My time in the U.S. was cut short when I was diagnosed with cancer and returned home to the U.K.  I have appeared in a couple of movies, including “Chariots of Fire” and “Give My Regards To Broad Street”.  Who Am I?
 
First off, I have to make a correction.  As was pointed out to me by Mr. B.D. Miller, the movie listed above should have been “Quest For Fire” and not “Chariots of Fire”.  Oops!  Sorry Peeps and thank you for the correction.  But that slight goof on my part didn’t prevent many of you from getting the right answer, which was of course Giant Haystacks, aka Loch Ness.  Correctly answering were:  Shane Briggs, Chad Burttram, Jason Vinduska, Brian Johnson, B.D. Miller, Harold Schwan, Ken Parkman and my former tag team partner, Russell Jackson.  Great job all…  Now let’s do a newbie…
 
I’m a second generation superstar who had moderate success as both a singles and tag team wrestler.  Early in my career, I teamed with a “mad dog” for much success and then went on to help break “the enforcer” into the world of wrestling super-stardom when we were a team.  I was a lumberjack of a man for a while and I’ve been called a maniac, but I experienced my greatest success when I quit being serious and just started acting like a clown.  Who Am I?
 
Think you know the answer?  Send your response to Doug28352@yahoo.com or else visit me on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/saltpalace and give me your answers via the inbox.  Questions and comments can also be sent to the same places and you can follow me on Twitter at @doug28352.  Thank you for reading and I’ll catch you on the flip side.  I’m Doug and “dat’ is all de’ people need to know!”
 
Ubuntu!
 
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