Tossing Salt Presents:
Questions (Not) By Casper #95
Random Twitter Q&A
June 4, 2023
DougMaynard.com

Once upon a time, there was a man named Casper who lived on Twitter and asked lots of great questions. He asked and I would answer, thus Questions By Casper was born. But then one day, he vanished and I had to find another source for my Q&As. Well, Twitter stepped up and now provides me with lots of random questions. It’s not Casper anymore, but it’s still lots of great fun. Now it’s Questions (Not) By Casper. And it all starts right now. Let’s go.

Are you celebrating Pride Month?

What is there to celebrate? I’m a gay man, but I don’t care for all of the freaks who have hijacked our identities and characters. I’m gay. Big freaking deal. All I and the huge majority of gay folks want is to just live our lives, be treated the same as everyone else, and be judged for ourselves and not who we’re attracted to or sleep with. No big deal, right? And now, these extreme freaks, who want to play make-believe, sexualize children, brainwash the masses, and associate with pedophiles, have hijacked our lives. I’m not ashamed to be a gay man. I am who I am. But the antics of the Alphabet Club are destroying everything that matters and setting us back centuries, with their antics and insanity. That is nothing at all to be proud of.

In addition to English, I would like to be fluent in __.

Chinese. May as well be able to speak the language when they call in their markers and take over the United States, right?

What are your strategies for bouncing back after a failure?

I just sigh, grit my teeth, pick myself up, and keep on keeping on. And I might drink a cold beer for good measure. It may not help, but it doesn’t hurt either so why take chances?

What’s the most beautiful place you’ve ever visited?

I remember a night at Atlantic Beach when a friend and I sat on the beach and watched the sun rise over the ocean. It was just a magical moment that I’ll never forget.

Have you ever gotten into a fistfight/physical fight before? Did you win?

One or two over the years of my life. And I didn’t lose.

Name a song that mentions shot/shoot/shooting.

Bang Bang by Cher. It’s been covered by a ton of people and it’s just a good song. Here you go.

Who’s your favorite 90’s hip hop artist?

Was Eminem around in the 90s? Let’s go with the Beastie Boys. After all, they fought for our right to party.

Is Tiger Woods the greatest golfer of all time?

No, that would be Happy Gilmore.

What’s a horror film that traumatized you?

Bambi. Those damn hunters killed Bambi’s mama. Those bastards!

Who do you prefer? Jim Carrey or Will Ferrell?

Both are annoying, but at least Jim Carey used to be funny in In Living Color and the Ace Ventura movies before TDR infected his mind and he turned into a woken jackass. Will Ferell only has the Step Brothers thing going for him.

What’s a conspiracy theory you’d never publicly admit to believing?

If I won’t publicly admit to believing it, then why would I admit to it here? Just because I believe that Joe Biden is a pedophile and a puppet of some hidden powers who lead from the shadows doesn’t mean I’ll admit it. After all, Big Brother is watching and I don’t want to let them know that I’m on to them. But I am. Those bastards!

What goes best with scrambled eggs?

Sausage and sausage gravy. It’s a great breakfast.

Do you think the Covid Vaccine was a good idea?

Considering how the whole pandemic thing almost destroyed our country, those shots were mandated after Biden assured everyone that if you get the shot, you won’t get covid… period, and after the shots, people started getting sick, breaking down, having blood clots, and dying, all to stop a modified version of the flu with a 99% survival rate, no that vaccine was not a good idea.

Do you like attending weddings?

I’m happy for the people who are getting married, but attending is not a big thrill to me.

And there you go. My thanks for reading. Comments, thoughts, and any questions are welcome and appreciated. And with that, let’s wrap it up. Stay well, my friends and I’ll see you at the ice cream truck.

Ubuntu!