Tossing Salt Presents:
Questions (Not) By Casper #112
Random Twitter Q&A
June 27, 2023
DougMaynard.com

Once upon a time, there was a man named Casper who lived on Twitter and asked lots of great questions. He asked and I would answer, thus Questions By Casper was born. But then one day, he vanished and I had to find another source for my Q&As. Well, Twitter stepped up and now provides me with lots of random questions. It’s not Casper anymore, but it’s still lots of great fun. Now it’s Questions (Not) By Casper. And it all starts right now. Let’s go.

Do you trust a maid inside your home?

It would depend upon who the maid is and what part of the house she’s working in and cleaning. No, probably not. But I’m willing to work on my trust issues if anyone wants to come clean this house. Baby steps.

Would you rather go to space or the depths of the ocean?

Despite the tragedy this past weekend, I’d still pick the ocean. I like fish better than Martians.

Could you survive without electricity?

Survive? Yes. But I’d be a miserable bastard for sure.

What’s absolutely worth spending the extra money to get the “nice” version of?

Hookers, booze, and drugs. Always go for the good stuff. You’ll appreciate the difference.

What is your favorite sport to play?

Beer Pong. And Truth or Dare. That’s a sport, right?

What’s the worst thing you ever dropped on your foot?

Jars, cans, a cat, logs, a hammer, etc. But the worst? A pot of soup, fresh off the stove. That bitch burned and smashed my foot.

What do you have zero tolerance for?

Pedophiles, liars, and people who try and take advantage, but think I don’t know.

Who is the greatest Veterinarian of all time?

There can be only one. Dr.Doolittle.

Who is the greatest fictional trustworthy person of all time?

I’m drawing a blank here because my first instinct is don’t trust anybody, real or fictional. I guess I’ll say comedian Brad Williams. He’s actually a real person, but he’s a dwarf and he’s got an honest face so he’s still my choice.

Did anyone from your high school make it as a professional athlete?

We had a couple of guys from my high school class that went to the NFL. Matt and Jim Riggs. Plus we’ve had quite a few alumni from Scotland High School go to that squared circle and wrestle professionally with differing degrees of success.

What movie or book character are you most similar to?

Go watch the movie Clerks. Look at Dante. That’s me.

How long will you be remembered after the day that you die?

By some, just a short time, but by others, forever.

How do you upgrade mashed potatoes?

Get them from KFC. No upgrade is necessary.

Who is the greatest fictional Spy of all time?

Natasha Romanoff, aka The Black Widow.

What is the greatest movie of all time?

A tough call because there are so many good ones out there. I’ll say Airplane!

And there you go. My thanks for reading. Comments, thoughts, and any questions are welcome and appreciated. And with that, let’s wrap things up. Take care and be well, my friends. And I’ll see you at the Mall. I’ll be at Spencer’s.

Ubuntu!