Tossing Salt Presents:
Questions (Not) By Casper #113
Random Twitter Q&A
June 27, 2023
DougMaynard.com

Once upon a time, there was a man named Casper who lived on Twitter and asked lots of great questions. He asked and I would answer, thus Questions By Casper was born. But then one day, he vanished and I had to find another source for my Q&As. Well, Twitter stepped up and now provides me with lots of random questions. It’s not Casper anymore, but it’s still lots of great fun. Now it’s Questions (Not) By Casper. And it all starts right now. Let’s go.

How many meals per week do you prepare from scratch at home?

Honestly, maybe three at the most and that would just be breakfasts every so often. The rest of my meals are either drive-thru or frozen foods tossed into the oven for a few minutes at 400 degrees.

What should be the punishment for people who abuse animals?

Do to them as they did the animals. Or just shoot the bastards. Either/or.

What’s your AC set to?

We keep it set at 75 degrees. Ma is always cold.

Name a famous pilot.

Let’s go with the Red Baron. He was a legend to the Germans in World War I.

What’s a great song that features the drummer on lead vocals?

Octopus’s Garden by the Beatles, featuring Ringo Starr.

Who is your favorite NFL coach of all time?

The late, great Tom Landry, former Coach for the Dallas Cowboys, when they actually mattered.

If you could name the first city on Mars, what would you name it?

I’d want something with honor, value, and an air of prestige. Let’s go with Hooterville.

What should be the punishment for groomers who expose themselves to children?

Cut their shit off. Place it in a miniature guillotine and choppy, choppy, pee pee.

If you came with a warning label, what would it say?

Caution: May be addicting!

Mounds/Almond Joy?

I like both, because sometimes you feel like a nut. Sometimes, you don’t.

What is your favorite Marvel movie?

Howard the Duck. Any other answer is wrong.

What is the one most important thing to get done this week?

For me, it’s finding a few minutes to get away from this house, settle myself and find a moment or two of peach for my heart, mind, and soul. Plus get laid!

Poorly explain what you do for a job.

Which job? I encourage people to chemically enhance their personalities and make bad decisions. And I answer questions in a real way about a predetermined work of art that pretends to be a sport.

Do you pronounce it tomato or tomato?

I say, tomato.

Are you boycotting Bud Light & Target?

Nope, not really. My beers of choice have always been either Bud Light or Natural Light and since I’m a simple man with simple tastes, I’m not changing just because someone doesn’t approve. As for Target, there is no Target in our town so going or not going, it’s not an option.

And there you go. My thanks for reading. Comments, thoughts, and any questions are welcome and appreciated. And with that, take care and be good, my friends. I’ll see you at the pool.

Ubuntu!