Tossing Salt Presents:
Questions (Not) By Casper #144
Random Twitter Q&A
August 2, 2023
DougMaynard.com

Once upon a time, there was a man named Casper who lived on Twitter and asked lots of great questions. He asked and I would answer, thus Questions By Casper was born. But then one day, he vanished and I had to find another source for my Q&As. Well, Twitter stepped up and now provides me with lots of random questions. It’s not Casper anymore, but it’s still lots of great fun. Now it’s Questions (Not) By Casper. And it all starts right now. Let’s go.

Could you give up bread for life for 10 million dollars?

Do wraps count as bread? How about hushpuppies? Pizza crust? Yeah, I can give up sandwiches, biscuits, and buns. Show me the money.

What is horribly overpriced but you still pay for?

Cable. We get cable, internet, and phone service through Spectrum and the bill is so damn high and outrageous. If it was just me, the cable and phone would be gone immediately, but I have my Mom here and she watches TV and likes having a house phone, so I endure, bite my teeth, and pay that exuberant, insane amount every month. It’s easily the highest bill I have every month and I’d love to tell Spectrum to piss off, but so long as things are as they are, I have no choice.

What popular movie have you NEVER seen?

Take your pick. ET, Gone With The Wind, Barbie, etc.

What’s the proper gift to give for a meteor shower?

A bottle of good liquor. It’s the proper gift for every occasion.

What do you like to put hot sauce on?

I don’t like hot sauce and add it to absolutely nothing. Nothing at all.

You get invited to a New Kids on the Block concert by a friend, so are you going?

Hell yes, I’m going. The NKOTB was easily one of my guilty pleasures of my younger days. Those guys were extremely talented, hot, and could sing. Jordon Knight should be by baby-daddy. So yes, I’d be first in line on this trip.

What is the most unusual thing you got really into for a while?

Comics, wrestling, sex, songwriting, poetry, and action figures, but none of those would be described as unusual or weird. The most unusual? Probably low-budget/no-budget horror flicks. The more awful the movie, usually the better it was. I was into that for a while. Ed Wood was my hero.

When you hear the name “Pee-wee Herman” what’s the first thing that comes to mind?

The first thing for me was when he showed up at the 1991 MTV Video Music Awards, immediately after the movie theatre scandal. It was his first major experience, his comeback if you will. He was awesome. RIP Paul Reubens. You will be missed.

Do you own more than 100 books?

Easily. I need to turn that spare bedroom into a library and media room, but with all the books, comics, magazines, CDs, cassettes, DVDs, and VCR tapes, I don’t think it would be big enough.

What Disney song gets you amped up?

The Time Warp from the Rocky Horror Picture Show. And yes, it counts. Disney owns Fox and Fox owns the RHPS, so that means The Mouse owns The RHPS and thus, all the songs from Rocky Horror are now Disney Songs. And now, let’s take that step to the left.

What did July teach you?

Leave the past in the past and don’t trust anybody.

Do you drink bottled water?

Flavored bottled water, yes…

Do you oppose MEN competing in WOMEN’S sports? YES or NO?

Of course, I do. Women’s sports are for Women. It even says so in the title, “Women’s Sports”. And men are not women. It really is that simple and easy.

Without naming it, what’s your hometown known for?

Drug addicts, crime, shooting, poverty, a corrupt “good old boys” local government, and taters from Nic’s Pic.

How many Aunts and Uncles do you have?

My Mom had eight siblings, only two of which are still alive, and my Dad had twelve siblings, none of who are still living that I’m aware of. So 8 plus 12 = 20. I have twenty Aunts and Uncles. And of those twenty, there were only probably three that I knew well.

What’s the weirdest thing you’ve found in a shower?

My sexy-ass friend from up the road wanted to give me a surprise. He gave me a scare by jumping into the shower with me and then I gave him a few things in return. It was a great experience.

And there you go. Thank you for reading. Comments, thoughts, and any questions are welcome and appreciated. Be sure to like, subscribe, and share. And with that, let’s wrap it up for the night. The sun is starting to come up and I need to get to bed for a few hours. Take care and be well, my friends. I’ll see you at the liquor store in about 51/2 hours.

Ubuntu!