Tossing Salt Presents:
Ultimate X Q&A #13
Random Questions from the Land of Tweets
DougMaynard.com
Doug Maynard

Every day, my Twitter feed is filled with dozens of random questions. This is where I provide the answers. It’s Ultimate X Q&A. Let’s do this.

If you were famous, what do you think it would be for?

I would hope it would be for being a writer or as I like to call it, an internet wrestling journalist. But most likely, it will be more infamous than actually famous and I’ll be the weird dude in the neighborhood that has all the cats.

What are your thoughts on earning a college degree vs having 4 years of work experience?

A degree is nice on the resume and looks pretty, but nothing beats actual work experience.

If you could have an animal sidekick, what would it be?

I already do have an animal sidekick, or maybe I’m his sidekick? I’ll have to ask about that, but he’s gray, very opinionated, spoiled damn rotten, and I call him Mouthie.

Who are you?

The weird ass dude with one leg who has a sick sense of humor, and a big heart, pays more attention than most people think and has been hurt more than most people realize. Those I love and care for, I love hard and cherish like no others, but if I feel used or betrayed, I can walk away easily. I’m stubborn, and defiant, and will never give up. I am me. I am Dougie.

Would you rather know all the mysteries of the universe or know every outcome of every choice you make?

I like a little mystery in life so let’s leave those alone. But knowing what the outcome of any choice or decision I am forced to make, I can see where that might come in handy. Let’s go with that one.

Vegan, vegetarian, pescatarian, or carnivore — where do you fit in, if at all?

I’m definitely not a vegan or vegetarian. I like meat too much. (Insert gay joke here!). But I’m not a carnivore because I do like my veggies, especially once I get them out of the wheelchairs. And I’m not even sure what pescatarian even means. Maybe it has something to do with the way I fill out my jeans. Hell if I know. Let’s go with that one.

If there is a zombie apocalypse, who are the three people you would want on your team?

This one is easy for me. My bro-son, the Infamous One, his lovely wife, and the Mini-Me. They know about weapons, zombies, and survival, and are just the best damn people I know. I’d match my bro and his boy against a zombie apocalypse anytime.

If you had your own talk show, who would you invite as your first guest?

If I could only have one guest, it’s Alice Cooper. If I have a whole show though and have like three guests, like the old Carson show used to be, it’d be comedian Brad Williams, actor Johnny Depp, and musical guest Alice Cooper. It would be so much fun and my show would rock!

What fictional family would you like to be a member of?

I’d go with either the Conner family from Roseanne, because I’d feel right at home, or the Addams Family because I’d fit right in and probably creep some of them out a little bit. Either works for me.

Is there a certain artist or band that has been particularly inspiring for you?

Anyone who has known me for more than thirty minutes can answer this one. Either Alice Cooper or Waylon Jennings. I became a fan of Alice when I was 8 years old. I became a fan of Waylon when I was 10. And now, many many years later, they’re still my Top 2 and always will be.

And there you go. My thanks for reading. Comments, thoughts, and any questions are welcome and appreciated. Be sure to like, share, and subscribe. And with that, let’s wrap things up. Take care and be well, my friends. I’ll see you at the Tiki Bar.

Ubuntu!