Tossing Salt Presents:
12 (Dougie) Days of Christmas (2)
RHCP, The Perfect Man & A Letter to Santa
DougMaynard.com
Doug Maynard

And here we are at Day 2 of 12 (Dougie) Days of Christmas. The streak is alive and well. As I explained yesterday, in honor of the Twelve Days of Christmas, I’m doing 12 Days of Dougie in a row. And we have a twist. One of the topics each day will be holiday-related. Is that awesome, or what? More like, or what… lol.

So, let’s get right to it. Two topics from the infamous Magic Bag and one topic from the very special holiday version of the infamous Magic Bag. And we have RHCP (Red Hot Chili Peppers) and The Perfect Man. For the Christmas bag, we have A Letter To Santa. Okay, I think we can do something with this. Are you ready to jingle bell rock? Let’s deck the halls and do this.

RHCP

As everyone knows, the RHCP is the band, The Red Hot Chili Peppers. And they are awesome. I consider myself a huge fan and I love their music, but to be honest, I only own two albums by Anthony, Flea, and the guys. One is the early 90s classic, BloodSugarSexMagic, which cemented the band as top stars and brought them to the next level. With such hits as Under the Bridge, Give it Away Now, and so many others, it’s an amazing album.

The other album I own is called One Hot Minute. The RHCP had replaced guitarist John Frusciante with Jane’s Addiction guitar legend and tattoo aficionado Dave Navarro. Although this album wasn’t as successful as the prior one, I like it more and consider it their best album to date. My Friends, Tearjerker (written about Kurt Cobain) and Pea (a Flea solo track) are all amazing. Navarro left the band not long afterward and Frusciante returned. And they continue rocking to this day with some amazing songs and music. The album, Californication, was excellent. The Red Hot Chili Peppers will never be my favorite band. That spot belongs to Alice Cooper and Waylon Jennings being the co-holders of #1 in my “Big Six of Entertainment” listing, but they’re damn good and I will always be a fan.

The Perfect Man

Who or what is the Perfect Man? A guy who is loving, respectful, funny, and understanding. A guy who gives as much as he takes and always is considerate of your feelings and needs. A guy who is strong, smart, funny, and gives Uber-Hugs. A guy who is real and keeps it real. Too bad these guys don’t exist.

No matter how good a person is, we all have baggage, and we all have flaws. That’s what makes us human. The trick is to acknowledge the flaws as they accept yours and where one person fails, the other can balance them out to succeed, and vice-versa. Work hard and make it work. Most of us can’t do that. We’re too trapped by our own insecurities and baggage to help others and take half the load to make a relationship work. I know I am. I found the perfect guy… for me. And yet, the demons, fate, and my own insecurities are always in the way. For now, anyhow. At least, I’ve got a cat. He’s my baby and is the perfect man I truly need. ‘Nuff said!

A Letter to Santa

Dear Santa,

How’s it going, Kris? Yeah, it’s been a while. How is the Misses? How are the elves? Give everyone my best and a big hug. We’re all doing okay here. You know the deal. Some rough moments, but it is what it is.

And now that the small talk is out of the way, let’s talk business, shall we? I try not to bother you too much by asking for stuff, but I am writing this piece called A Day of Dougie, and Letter to Santa came up in the topics of discussion so here we are. And I figured, why not take advantage and actually ask for a few things and take advantage of this situation? Sounds like a plan right?

I know you’re more materialistic-natured than providing the inspirational stuff, but I know you have connections so pass the word, will you please? What do I want? I want the people I love to be healthy, happy, and prosper in this crazy world of ours. Instead of stress and worries, how about some peace, success, and happiness? That might be asking a lot, but you can do it. I’ve got faith in you, Kris. And maybe a little help to make some dreams come true. You know of whom I speak.

And since a few simple things are expected if the other stuff is too much to ask for, I want an official Red Ryder BB Gun. And no, I won’t put my eye out. A good set of earphones and a microphone for the computer so maybe I can evolve my game into podcasting would be great. And a certain someone under my non-existent Christmas tree waiting with a smile, a Pepsi Zero, and arms outstretched for an Uber Hug. And Mouthie wants treats. Lots and lots of treats.

And I guess that’s enough for this topic of discussion so I’ll wrap it up for now. Take care, Mr. C. Have a very Merry Christmas and I’ll see you at the matches. Thanks!

Ubuntu!
Dougie

And there you go. Reading back, this turned out a lot more serious natured than I usually like. My bad! I can’t help what comes out though. It’s the nature of the beast and the way this works. I have a topic, and I respond with whatever words flow from my soul. Thanks for reading anyhow. I’ll try for more insanity tomorrow. Comments, questions, Christmas presents, funny memes, and suggestive NSFW pictures of cute guys or cats are all welcome and appreciated. Drop me a line at Doug28352@yahoo.com. And now, I need to go to bed. I’ll see you later. Tomorrow will be #3. Have an awesome day.

Ubuntu!