Tossing Salt Presents:
Ultimate X Q&A
Random Questions from the Land of Tweets
DougMaynard.com
Doug Maynard

This world is full of questions. And many of them are on my Twitter timeline. I feel like answering a few of the most interesting. I’m Doug and this is the Ultimate X Q&A. Let’s do this.

What’s the most adventurous thing you’ve done in the last year?

The most adventurous thing? As the old song goes, I fooled around and fell in love. Yeah, I kind of dropped some of the walls and got to know an amazing guy much better. And for 8 months, I was a happy camper. Then I allowed my insecurities and anxiety to take control and we,, it is what it is. And yeah, I’m still in love, but with all the B.S. going on around here, I can’t be what he needs and it’s better to just be alone. I hate it, but for now, it’s what I have to do.

If you could instantly be an expert in one field, which would you choose?

Quantum physics, Ancient languages, and zoology. Okay, that’s three fields, but I was watching the Big Bang Theory and feeling motivated. So I’ll settle on being the Wrestling Guy and having a pretty good mind on retail sales and customer service. Fifty-three years of experience for one and well over forty years for the other. I’ll stick with what I know.

If you could change places with one person for the day, who would it be?

Nancy Pelosi. Now hear me out. Think of all the damage I could do to the Democratic party and anti-Trump powers using her body and person. She’s a drunken shrew of an evil bitch, but she has influence and power. And to use that, even for just one day, I could impact millions of people. And I’d use that power to support the President, destroy the Woken Agenda from the inside, and put that old cow in a hole so deep, she’d never be able to get out of it, nor would her associates and friends. Yeah, I’d make that sacrifice for America. WE THE PEOPLE!

Would you rather be famous but not wealthy or wealthy but unknown?

I’m already kind of semi-infamous and it’s cool to a point, but it sucks too. Fame doesn’t pay the bills. I’d rather be wealthy so I can live comfortably, plus help others as often as I can. Yeah, show me the money.

Which series should everyone watch?

Several come to mind. Roseanne for one, and I’m not talking about that crap that is now called “The Conners”. It’s pretty good, but the way they dumped Roseanne from her show was just disgusting. But Roseanne is so real, with the ups and downs, it’s a great show. And Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Yeah, the movie sucked except for Paul Rueben’s death scene, but the series is very good. And Sponge Bob Squarepants… just because.

President Trump asks you to pick six names to receive the Presidential Medal of Freedom. What six names are you choosing?

Alice Cooper would be my first pick. Alice isn’t political by nature, but he’s been a voice for anti-censorship and the youth of America for nearly sixty years. Plus he’s a good Christian man, married to the same woman since the mid-70s, and a strong advocate for Family Values. So Alice would be first. And the other five. This is harder than one would expect without being an absolute hypocrite. I’m trying to think of people who are still living that are truly deserving of the honor. I’m not Joe Biden after all. Let’s go with Roseanne, Kid Rock, Mr T, Dolly Parton, and Hulk Hogan.

How often do you eat Sloppy Joe’s?

Not nearly as often as I would like. I like them and keep at least two cans of Manwich sauce in the cabinets at all times. But, who can afford to buy ground beef? Have you been to the store lately? That dead cow cost money and we’re talking about a lot of it. I do at least once every couple of weeks though. It’s simple, filling, and tastes great. A sandwich is a sandwich, but a Manwich is a meal. Why do I think of Jeffrey Dahmer when I hear that? Moving on.

Babe Ruth isn’t available, who is the greatest baseball player of all time?

I know nothing about baseball, nor do I watch baseball. But that being said, even I know the answer to this one. Pete Rose. Period! End of story. And he belongs in the Hall of Fame.

Does weed consumption affect productivity?

Yes. Not only does smoking grass stink, but repeated use seems to slow brain cell functions and reaction time. It makes people stupid and slow, as well as smelly. Yes, I can see the positives with pain control and helping to relieve anxiety, but smelling like a dirty diaper, with the eyes half closed, and the reaction time of a sloth during his coffee break just doesn’t work for me, brother. I tried it when I was younger and then I grew up. Plus, on top of everything else, it’s illegal. No, I am not a fan.

What are your favorite three topics to talk about?

Wrestling, politics, and cats. Duh!

And there you go. Thanks for reading. Comments, thoughts, and any comments are welcome and appreciated. Like, share, and subscribe. And I’m through for now. Stay well, my friends, and I’ll see you at the lake. I’ll be feeding the ducks.

Ubuntu!