Tossing Salt Presents:
Ultimate X Q&A #141
Random Questions from the Land of Tweets
DougMaynard.com
Doug Maynard

Every day, my Twitter feed is filled with dozens of random questions. This is where I provide the answers. It’s the Ultimate X Q&A. My, how the time has flown by. It’s number 141, and I’m still standing. Let’s do this.

You tell your 13-year-old to take out the trash. Not only does he tell you NO, but he bumps you as he walks by. What’s your next move?

We call the funeral home and make arrangements.

Who’s your favorite Beatle?

Ringo, of course. He’s a classic. Just ask him and he’ll tell you.

Do you eat Red Meat at least once a day?

I hardly ever eat red meat much anymore. Have you seen the prices? I still like my hamburgers, but mostly these days, I’m a chicken dude.

Are you confident in your ability to write?

Things such as Q&As and pieces about wrestling, yes. Stories though? I have my moments, but I spend as much time second-guessing myself as I do actual writing.

If Elon gave you 5 mins to sit down with him one-on-one, what would you say to him?

I’d try to sell myself for a job making big money and talking about nothing, much as I do here at the site.

What is a silent killer that people don’t realize is slowly killing them?

Stress. I know it’s slowly killing me.

Do you ever wake up and think “I can’t be bothered today”?

I often wake up feeling that way, and my cat reminds me that what I think is irrelevant. I am his servant, so I need to get my ass up and fulfill my responsibilities.

What would you do if you found out that everyone else in the world was an android and you were the only real human?

I’d start wondering how everyone was having babies for so long. And then, carry on with my life. Androids are people too, right?

Have you achieved most of your life’s goals?

Nope. I still have to write a book, have kids, and get married to take care of the big things that are left. And be involved in a wrestling angle. Maybe have a heel beat me up and steal my leg. I’m not sure what exactly, but I need to do something one day.

If JD Vance and Gavin Newsome were to run for president against each other in 2028, who do you think would win?

I would hope that America isn’t stupid enough to elect Gavin Newsome. Look what that clown has done to California. Four more years of Brandon would be better than him. So, I would hope JD Vance would win.

What do you like most about going to the beach?

Just watching the ocean as the sun goes down and experiencing the magic and power that it presents.

What is your current favorite TV show?

Current? I don’t watch TV except for wrestling. The shows I like, such as Shameless and Big Bang Theory have all been canceled. If I do watch TV now, it’s either news or something like House Hunters International or Love It or List It on HGTV. Oh yeah, sometimes I watch Family Guy. So, there you go.

If you were given the chance to kiss and hug someone, who would that be?

Eric. I miss that guy and damn it, I want him back in my life. He has the best damn hugs of everyone I know.

What is one piece of advice you wished you’d seriously taken?

I wish I had gotten more opinions and talked to more doctors before my leg was amputated. I trusted and respected my doctor at the time, Dr. Parks, but now, after dealing with Dr. Neal and his treatment of my other foot, I think Dr. Parks may have rushed things and didn’t weigh all the options. If my original doctor had been Dr. Neal, I think I may have kept my leg longer and possibly might even still have it.

Which of the Seven Dwarfs resembles you the most?

Grumpy.

Have you experienced falling down the stairs?

A few times over the past few years. It’s not fun at all. It hurts.

What is the best song to describe your life right now?

How about this classic ditty from Faith No More? A little song called Falling to Pieces.

What’s the last thing on your bucket list?

Probably the marriage thing. I want to be married and have that special and perfect guy to share my life with. Unfortunately, I screwed that up. I’m such a fucking idiot sometimes.

What sound do you hate?

The dog whining or the cat throwing up. Take your pick.

And there you go. Thanks for reading. Comments, thoughts, and any questions are welcome and appreciated. Be sure to like, share, and subscribe. And with that, let’s close up the shop today. Take care and be well, my friends. I’ll see you at the office.

Ubuntu!