Tossing Salt Presents:
Ultimate X Q&A #143
Random Questions from the Land of Tweets
DougMaynard.com
Doug Maynard

Every day, my Twitter feed is filled with dozens of random questions. This is where I provide the answers. It’s the Ultimate X Q&A. My, how the time has flown by. It’s number 143, and I’m still standing. Let’s do this.

If you followed your childhood pretend job, what would you be right now?

I’d be a writer, a professional wrestler, or a television weatherman. And now, I write about wrestling, and it’s sunny outside, but very humid.

Have you ever cried on your own birthday?

I have many times, most recently a few weeks ago. One text, three IMs, and many messages on FB, but aside from Theresa and Kenneth, all of my best friends and so-called family, not a word. Yeah, I really felt special and important that day. I know I’m being petty and dramatic, but being forgotten by those who once mattered most, that hurts.

On a scale of 1 to 10, how important is music in your life?

A 9.5 for sure. Music is very important to me.

What’s the best part of having a dog?

It gives my cat something to torture and boss around.

What’s the best drink to go with pizza?

An ice-cold beer… or a Pepsi Zero since I rarely drink anymore.

Are your friends actually there for you when you need them, or not?

The ones who really matter, yes. The ones who can’t benefit or get anything from the deal, not really.

What’s the equivalent of getting flowers for men?

Head. Or food. Good food is always good.

What is your favorite Winter Olympics sport?

Snowball fights. That’s a sport, right?

What are the qualities you search for in other people?

Honesty, humor, insightfulness, and common sense.

Are you more of a “fix it yourself” or “call an expert” kind of person?

I prefer to call someone. I know my limitations.

Which fictional book character would you like to meet?

Jacob Black from the Twilight books. He’s a sexy thing. Team Jacob all the way.

Who was the best opening act you have ever seen at a concert?

I remember seeing Waylon Jennings opening for Hank Jr. Waylon had cooled off from the ’70s, and Hank Jr. was making hit after hit after hit, so Hank got the top billing. Waylon’s health was beginning to fail, but it was still Waylon, and he’s a legend for a reason. Always the best, then, now, and forever.

What do you have an abundance of?

I’ll let this song and video answer the question for me. It’s Styx.

Have you ever cracked open an alcoholic beverage before midday?

It may have happened once or twice over the years, but I worked third shift for many years, so it’s all good. Plus, I was thirsty.

How old were you when you got your first tattoo?

I was 31 years old, living in Wilmington, NC, and it was a birthday gift from Steve and Marshall, two of my amazing employees, while I was playing manager at the Dairy Mart.

Is there anyone in politics you trust?

Our local Sheriff, Ralph Kersey, and maybe two of his deputies. Would that count as politicians? Aside from Ralph, Jason, and Chris, I can’t think of anyone else. Jesse Helms is dead.

Can you date your friend’s ex?

It would depend on the friend and the ex, but generally, the answer would be no. A booty call and some quick fun are okay, but no dating allowed.

Do you eat breakfast every day?

Not usually, no.

If necessary, could you defend yourself?

I’m not as good as I once was, but once, I was as good as I ever was, or something like that. Try me and find out.

And there you go. Thanks for reading. Comments, thoughts, and any questions are welcome and appreciated. Be sure to like, share, and subscribe. And with that, let’s close up the shop today. Take care and be well, my friends. I’ll see you in Electronics.

Ubuntu!