Tossing Salt Presents:
Ultimate X Q&A #152
Random Questions from the Land of Tweets
DougMaynard.com
Doug Maynard

Every day, my Twitter feed is filled with dozens of random questions. This is where I provide the answers. It’s the Ultimate X Q&A. My, how the time has flown by. It’s number 152, and I’m still standing. Let’s do this.

What are you good at that you’re really proud of?

I can’t really say, but the guys know. Writing. Yeah, let’s go with that.

What’s the best holiday you’ve ever been on?

The many Christmas vacations when we were young, going to my Grandma’s home in Ohio. They were fun then, and thinking back now, the value and pleasure of those times are even stronger.

Men, does a woman’s body count matter to you?

Why should it? Whatever a person’s body count is, it doesn’t matter. I wasn’t an angel, so why should I expect anyone else to be a Saint? So long as, if we’re together, no one is sleeping around, what we did before and who with doesn’t matter.

Have you ever been too nice and ended up in a situation that could’ve been avoided if you just would’ve been an asshole?

More times than I care to think about.

How would you describe your sense of humor?

Sick, twisted, dark, demented, perverted, and somewhat odd. And all of that is on a good day.

What’s something you would never buy, even if you had 2 billion dollars?

A meal from Wendy’s. I’ve been boycotting that place for nearly ten years after poor service, and they pissed me off. Yeah, I am that petty. Or a bottle of El Toro Tequila. That shit whooped me so bad when I was 17 years old, I swore never again. And that’s one promise I’m keeping.

What is the worst possible name you might give your child?

Anything that sounds made up and fake, or extremely ethnic.

If animals could talk, which one would you love to communicate with?

Cats, especially my baby, Mouthie. We have conversations all the time, but it’d be nice to actually know what he’s saying.

Still believe in marriage, the idea of marriage, or the sanctity of marriage?

All of the above. I want to be married, to the right person, of course.

Do you have to go to college to be successful in life?

College is overrated. It looks good on a resume, but the main thing it takes to be successful is hard work, a strong work ethic, and determination. College is a necessary evil for some jobs, but not for all. It depends on the job and the person.

If polygamy were normalized with zero judgment, how many wives would you actually want?

Why would I want ANY wives? A good husband, maybe, but no wives. And I’d only want one. That would be more than enough.

Is it possible to be friends with an ex?

Yes, it is. I’m friends with most of my exes. Just because a dating relationship doesn’t work doesn’t mean they’re bad people or don’t have good points. Some relationships go bad, but there are still common interests, and it can be positive in many ways. It just takes being adult enough to realize that.

Who would be on your Mt. Rushmore of independent filmmakers?

Kevin Smith, Larry Clark, Gus Van Sant, and John Waters.

The last time you wore a band t-shirt. Who was the band?

I’m wearing a Waylon Jennings shirt right now, and last night, I was wearing a shirt with Sublime on it.

And there you go. Thanks for reading. Comments, thoughts, and any questions are welcome and appreciated. Be sure to like, share, and subscribe. And with that, let’s close up the shop today. Take care and be well, my friends. I’ll see you at the HOA meeting.

Ubuntu!