Tossing Salt Presents:
Ultimate X Q&A #158
Random Questions from the Land of Tweets
DougMaynard.com
Doug Maynard

Every day, my Twitter feed is filled with dozens of random questions. This is where I provide the answers. It’s the Ultimate X Q&A. My, how the time has flown by. It’s number 158, and I’m still standing. Let’s do this.

Do you believe in ghosts, demons, and otherworldly spirits?

I believe that there are many things out there that we don’t know about, understand, and are far beyond our comprehension. So, that would be a yes.

Are you someone who could sleep in until noon every day?

I can stay in bed until noon, but I rarely sleep. I’m up every morning, awake, between 6 and 7 am, without fail.

Did your parents choose the branch from the tree you were getting whooped with, or did they make you choose your own?

My grandma used the branch, and she made us go find one. My parents used belts, shoes, or whatever happened to be handy and convenient.

Actress Alyssa Milano says, “The red MAGA hat is the new white hood.” Is she right?

Who cares what this loser baby-killer bitch says? She’s an idiot… and she’s wrong.

Have you ever pretended to be sick when you were perfectly healthy?

I haven’t been perfectly healthy for years. I have called in sick when I just didn’t want to go to work, but I didn’t make any falsehoods about it.

Do men still open doors?

Yes, we do. How else would we get inside a room?

Does bacon belong on hot dogs?

I’ve never tried bacon on a hot dog, but it sounds interesting. I guess if that’s what you want or like, it’s okay.

Would you spend 30 days handcuffed to your ex for $250,000?

My most recent Ex? Hell, I’d gladly be handcuffed to him for free. I was an idiot and pushed him away. If I had the opportunity to do it again, I’d take the handcuffs and never make that mistake, letting him get away, again.

If you were to open a store, what would you sell and what would be its name?

I’d love to open a used-items shop, a consignment shop. Yeah, I’d be a junkman. And the name? Maynard and Bro-Son.

What would you do or say if you had the attention of the whole world for twenty seconds?

I’d probably smirk and say, “You just don’t know! Film at 11:00!”.

Are you a forgiving person?

Too forgiving, or at least I was. Now, not quite so much.

Who’s your all-time favorite female singer?

This one is tough. Rickie Lee Jones? Jessi Colter? Ann Wilson? Betty Wright? There are so many talented ladies out there and my favorite? It depends on my mood at the moment. Let’s say Tina Turner.

What’s the first song that comes to mind when you see Mariah Carey?

This one, from a live MTV Unplugged special, covering the Jackson 5 hit, I’ll Be There.

What do you usually do during weekends?

Sleep, write, laundry, clean, and spend time with my cat.

What’s the worst reply to “I’m pregnant”?

So? You’d better go tell the daddy!

What are your thoughts on organized religion?

Generally good intentions but corrupt as hell. I am spiritual in many ways, but so-called organized religion gives me the willies.

And there you go. Thanks for reading. Comments, thoughts, and any questions are welcome and appreciated. Be sure to like, share, and subscribe. And with that, let’s close up the shop today. Take care and be well, my friends. I’ll see you in the holding cell.

Ubuntu!