Tossing Salt Presents:
Ultimate X Q&A #170
Random Questions from the Land of Tweets
DougMaynard.com
Doug Maynard

Every day, my Twitter feed is filled with dozens of random questions. This is where I provide the answers. It’s the Ultimate X Q&A. My, how the time has flown by. It’s number 170, and I’m still here. Don’t say I don’t love ya.

How do you define beauty in another person?

That passion in their eyes, the warmth of their heart, and the magic that is their soul.

Which meal is your favorite: breakfast, lunch, or dinner?

I don’t do labels. It’s a meal, and nothing more. Probably the daytime one.

Do you like going to the movies or prefer watching them at home?

I prefer the theater. It’s more of an experience and adds to the movie. But due to my anxiety, I generally watch them at home.

What’s your love language?

I’m here. And I like the small touches and inside jokes.

What’s your go-to midnight snack?

Usually, it’s chicken nuggets or Mac & Cheese.

What’s your perfect romantic getaway?

A suitcase of beer and a room at Pine Acres.

What life lessons have you had to learn the hard way?

Don’t trust anyone. Even the best of people will hurt you eventually.

Do you think kids should do chores around the house?

Absolutely. They help make the messes, and they should help clean them up. And it teaches responsibility.

Do you like your own voice?

It’s not too bad, but I sound like a redneck hick when I talk. Pure country all the way, with a slight Yankee edge.

Did you ever flatten a penny at the railroad tracks?

Once or twice, I may have. Ok, yeah. I did it.

Should transgender individuals be allowed to own guns?

If they can’t determine their own gender, they’re obviously mentally ill. And crazy people shouldn’t own guns.

Are you a night owl or a morning bird?

Late night and early morning. I don’t do daylight if I can avoid it.

What’s a fact you’re shocked more people aren’t aware of?

Cows have to get pregnant to make milk.

What unconventional animal do you wish you had as a pet?

A skunk. They’re intelligent, can be litter box trained, and are very affectionate and loving animals. Remove the scent glands, and a skunk can make a very sociable and loving pet.

If you could only wear one color for the rest of your life, what would it be?

Black, and if that’s not an option, then purple.

Do you enjoy travelling?

I hate even leaving the house. So, that would be a no.

What’s your favorite way to spend time with your family?

My blood family? I prefer to see them in passing and yell from the other room.

What’s your all-time favorite movie quote?

I’m not even supposed to be here today! – Dante, from the movie Clerks.

How do you prioritize self-care?

I do what I have to do to stay alive. ‘Nuff said!

Does eating a large amount of eggs impact cholesterol levels?

That’s what I’ve heard. I don’t know if it’s true or not. I’m not a doctor.

What word would you best use to describe yourself?

Eclectic.

What’s the last TV show you binge-watched?

Wednesday, Season 2, on Netflix. It was okay, but Season 1 was better. And the Muppet Show. Love me some Animal.

What weird smell do you find appealing?

A sexy man’s underarms. Yeah, I’m a pits guy.

What’s something you’ve always wanted to learn how to do?

Play the piano, and sing. I want to be Stevie Wonder, but white and with eyesight.

Do you prefer cities or remote places?

Remote. People get on my nerves.

Do you sing in the shower?

Not so much anymore. Taking a shower is more of an ordeal now, and I’m just trying to get through it, get clean, and get out. I’ll sing when I’m cleaning house, lying in bed, or sitting at the computer, and a song I like comes on the YouTube feed.

If you could live in a movie, which one would it be, and why?

I’d live in Kevin Smith’s View Askew Universe, and the movie, Clerks. As for why, that movie is essentially my life put to film already. Major changes from my current reality would not be necessary.

What’s the most challenging thing you’ve overcome in life?

Thus far, the loss of my leg and the diabetes over the past decade, and all that has brought with it.

Have you faced any moral or ethical dilemmas lately?

Every day of my life. I do what I feel is best and move on. No details necessary.

What’s a belief you once held that you’ve since outgrown?

I used to think that most people were essentially good, that cops were honest, and that people could be trusted. I’ve learned better about all of these.

Do you think people are naturally good or evil?

Most people start as good, but life and this world we live in corrupt that, and they change.

Should you brush your teeth before or after breakfast?

Before and after. Before getting the day started, getting rid of morning breath, and then after each meal during the day.

Should vaccines be mandatory?

It depends on the vaccine, but in general, no, they shouldn’t. It should be up to the person or, if they’re a minor, their parents.

What’s one of your biggest pet peeves — the thing that instantly annoys you?

People, and interruptions. And more people. I just don’t have much patience for people.

How do you handle failure?

I suck it up, take a deep breath, and keep moving forward.

And there you go. Thanks for reading. Comments, thoughts, and any questions are welcome and appreciated. Be sure to like, share, and subscribe. And with that, let’s close up the shop today. Take care and be well, my friends. I’ll see you in the lab.

Ubuntu!