Tossing Salt Presents:
A Day of Dougie
Alvin & The Chipmunks, Young Stuff, and Ultimate X
DougMaynard.com
Doug Maynard

Yeah, I decided to do it. Between the $800 water bill, whatever the costs will be when my truck gets out of the shop, and other assorted bills, I’m in a bind and screwed. I could go to NFC or Trophy and get a loan. I have a great history and credit with both places, but I paid those loans off after many long years, and the interest rates are insane. So I’m trying the GoFundMe route. Yeah, I have finally joined the ranks of 2025, where it’s better to ask for handouts than do it on your own. Living on a disability check and relying on SNAP for groceries, $24 a month, is bad enough, but a person has to do what a person has to do, so I am. It’s either this or OnlyFans. And nobody wants that… or do they? Hmmmm. Let me know what you think. Life can be a total biatch sometimes. Let’s move on.

I made sausage balls last night. I’ve been craving them for several weeks, and I’ve had the ingredients available in the freezer/fridge/cabinets for a while, but I kept procrastinating. Well, last night, as I watched the Drew Carey show on Tubi, my current binge, I decided, what the hell, and went to work. And guess what? They were good. Film at 11:00.

And now, let’s move on and do a quick Day of Dougie. Two topics from the Magic Bag, plus six Ultimate X questions. Does that sound like a plan or what? From the infamous Magic Bag, we have Alvin & The Chipmunks and Young Stuff. And as I said earlier, a few random questions from the Land of Tweets. So, are you ready? I said, ARE YOU READY? Two words for you. READ THIS! Okay, DX does it better, but at least I’m trying. Let’s boogie.

What do you wish you did more of?

Interacted with and reached out to people, having more human contact in my life. Yeah, I hate to admit it, but I get lonely sometimes.

Is climate change primarily caused by human activity?

Climate change is a myth and a total scam. And you can’t convince me otherwise.

Alvin & The Chipmunks

Alvin, Simon, Theodore, and Dave Seville. It’s been a cartoon, several movies, records, and so much more. Whoever figured that the story of three chipmunks and their human would make such an impact in the world? I can’t get through the holidays without playing the Christmas song by the Chipmunks at least 500 times over the month of December. The only song I play more is Steve Grand, and his cover of All I Want for Christmas Is You. Look it up on YouTube. A great song. As for Alvin and his two chipmunk brothers, here is my favorite parody of them. It’s from a Disaster Movie. Check it out.

Are electric vehicles better than gas-fueled vehicles?

I constantly forget to plug my phone in and charge it. Can you imagine me trying to remember to plug in the car? At least with the conventional gas car, I only have to remember to go by the Exxon once or twice a month. Give me the gas-fueled cars and trucks every time.

Would you be okay with a man in the locker room while your daughter changes?

I don’t care if it’s my wife, daughter, sister, niece, a stranger, or Grandma. Men DO NOT belong in the locker room with the women. Men change with the men, and women change with the women. And I don’t care what you think you are or claim to be. If you have a tallywhacker, you’re a man. Stick to your own locker room. No exceptions.

Young Stuff

Yeah, I used to like them young. Always legal, of course, but still younger than me. I remember all the college kids coming into the ABC, and damn, what a sight to see. But now I like my guys older and grown. The younger guys are fun to look at, but require training. The older guys do it just right. So long as they’re legal and a good person, I’m keeping my options open. I like the young bucks. And I like the daddies too. And now, you know.

Does pizza cut into squares taste better than pizza cut into triangles?

For some reason, it does. Go figure.

Ideally, how would you like to spend your birthday?

Wrapped in the arms of a certain sexy dude, after spending the day with my bro & the family, and a few other very close, wonderful people, chillaxin’ and watching movies together. Or maybe taking a long nap. Either/or.

And there you go. Another Day of Dougie in the books.Thanks for reading and your continued support. I do all of this, the writing, the site, for you. And because it’s cheaper than a shrink. I did go see a shrink once. Well, twice. The first one was a condescending bitch, and the second one transferred, aka quit on me, after one session. I guess I have issues that were too much for her, lol. But hell, I’ve gotta be me, right? Now, what was I saying? Stay well, my friends, and be kind to each other. I’ll see you at the movies.

Ubuntu!