Thirty Days of Dougie III – Part 13: Wedding Day
December 9, 2013

Yes, I know that I’m a few days behind on this whole “Thirty Days” gig, but things have been… well, I can’t say crazy because I’ve actually been sleeping more than anything else. When I’m depressed, I sleep. And I just haven’t really been much in the mood to write.

But now, at 1:46am on a Monday morning, I want to write. Go figure. The only thing is, what should I write about? I can’t really talk about what I really want to talk about because feelings might be hurt, things might end up getting tense or unhappy and this just isn’t the time nor the place.

But then again, what the hell? No one reads these things. I might get three to five views if I’m lucky and unless it’s something particularly interesting or controversial, no one cares what I write about. I’ll just make one very brief statement and then move on.

“People suck!”

I don’t need to go to the “Magic Box” for the topic this morning because this one came to me a couple of nights ago while I was hiding away in my room, embracing the darkness and trying to sift my way through the dark cloud that has become my life. It’s my wedding and what I would like it to be like. Yeah, I know that usually it’s the women and “brides” that generally get all mushy and sentimental about weddings, but guys have dreams too and a wedding and marriage is potentially one of the biggest moments in anyone’s life so you (I) would want things to be perfect. Here’s what I want.

My first choice for a setting was (and is) a wrestling ring. Yeah, I know it’s kind of weird, but I’m a big wrestling fan and have written about the world’s greatest sport for the past ten-plus years in various columns and pieces. But then again, considering that I’m not actually a wrestler, it might be a little awkward. After all, the idea of two men in a wrestling ring, in front of friends and fans, getting all physical and emotional with each other… who would ever want to see anything like that? Of course, we could also get on the microphones and take turns cutting promos on each other before the ceremony. That would be kind of fun and interesting. Hell, instead of exchanging vows, we could exchange promos and do impressions of our favorite wrestling superstars? Hmmmm… I actually like that idea.

But let’s be realistic here. As fun as that could be, I don’t think getting married inside a wrestling ring would really be appropiate. I’d do it in a heartbeat, but lets move on to something a little more practical. I’d like to do it here at my house… or maybe at a park, like the Pecan Orchard or Dragon Park here in Laurinburg. Just a big and open setting with trees and nature and plenty of room for friends and family.

And in case you’re wondering why I haven’t mentioned a church, it’s because I’m well aware that most churches, especially around here in NC, frown upon the idea of a “gay wedding” and two men being together, in love and pledging to spend their lives together. That’s sad because love is love and I would want and invite my church friends, from the Food Bank and Hope In Christ, where I volunteer, to be a part of my great day. I would understand if they declined, but the invitation would be there.

So we find a big, open area. Let’s say the Pecan Orchard. It’s a nice place and pretty cool. And now for the guests. Let’s keep it simple. I want my friends there, be it from school, my partying days, Facebook, work, neighbors, etc. If you’re my friend and you have a place in my “extended family” and we are (or were) close at some point, be there. It could not only be a wedding day, but also a “Stoney Crew” meets “Wilmington” meets “Dairy Mart” meets “Hasty” meets “Montclair Maffia” meets “Scotland High” meets “just cool people I know” meets “La Krew Familia” reunion. Oh yeah and it’s B.Y.O.B.

As for the atmosphere, I’m not a big guy on formality. Dress code is whatever floats your boat and makes you comfortable. I myself would actually break down and wear a suit and tie and go all formal. After all, a person only gets married once (or twice or three times) and it needs to be a big event. I don’t like getting all fancy, but the man I love is well worth it and I’d probably have a pair of jeans or shorts to slide into once it’s all over. The food – break out the grill and it’s hot dogs, hamburgers, potato salad, maybe some mac & cheese and baked beans. Or if we get really fancy, we get it all catered by Nic’s or KFC. Yeah, the sky is the limit with me. It’s about being with friends, catching up on things, making new friends and just having a good time. And who doesn’t love a cook out, right?

So we’ve got essentially a big picnic going on here. And sometime in the midst of all the chaos, we get everyone’s attention and have them sit / stand around while myself, the man I love and my best friends and his best friends all take our spots. Keep it simple and too the point as I tell how much I love that guy and how important he is to me and he does the same. My BFF, Ken hands me the ring and my other friends / family (Greg, Youngblood, TMA) stand up there for me as well. Yes, I have four “best men” (even if TMA is a lovely young woman – she’s amazing and very important to me) and it’s my wedding. We’ll make it work. My and my entourage are ready. The love of my life and his peeps are ready. We keep it short and sweet and exchange the vows and I kiss the man I love.

The end.

And then we party all night long like it’s 1999.

Yep, that’s what I want in a wedding, but to be honest, so long as I’m with the man I love, it doesn’t really matter how it goes. Just that we’re together.

And that’s all for now. I think I need to go write Chris a letter and tell him how important he is to me and how much I Iove him.

Ubuntu!