10 Days Of Douie (Day 4) – Radio Station, Fireball & The District Attorney

Ten Days Of Dougie – Day 4
Radio Stations, Fireball & District Attorney
April 22, 2018
DougMaynard.com

So how far behind am I? Ten Days and this is Day 4, which should have been up on Thursday. Today is Sunday. What the hell? But it’s been a rough week full of emergency rooms (not for me), problems with the internet and cable (damn you Spectrum), long hours at work and just general stress and chaos. Suffice it to say that there are many reasons that I’m running so far behind with this project. But alas, I am back and ready to get back on track. This is Day 4 and if I can get this and at least two more pieces written today, I’ll be caught up. It probably won’t happen, but it’s a good thought.

And now, let’s can the small talk and chit chat and get right to the heart of the matter and why we all are here. It’s time for (dramatic pause) the “Magic Bag”. So what are the topics for this epic adventure in writing? We have… “Radio Stations”, “Fireball” and “District Attorney”. Hmmmm… This one could be tricky at the end, but what the hell. Let’s take the chance and go for it. Are you ready? Let’s do this…

Radio Stations…

We all listen to the radio at some point, be it in the car or at work or late at night. While less people are watching TV these days than in years gone by and less people actually buy albums or CD’s, prefering to download movies on their computer or listen to tunes on their Ipod, the charm and allure and role of listening to the radio in our lives has remained a constant. I had an idea one time about actually owning my own radio station. It would be so cool, but I’d have to be extremely well off to do so. Where is that $500,000,000.00 Powerball Jackpot when I need it. I’d have to be rich as hell because the kind of radio station I have in mind would not and could not be advertising supported. It would be a bit too much on the controversial side. And “Why?”, you ask. Because it’d be me as the “Owner”, the “Mr. Carlson” if you will. And my station? You’ve heard of the stations that say “we play anything?”. Well, mine, depending upon who the pm-air personality is at the time. My tastes are eclectic ranging from jazz to big band to country to heavy metal to 89’s pop and everything else you might think of. Well, everything but gangsta rap. Rap is crap! ‘Nuff said. And I’d like my on-air talents, several of who I already have in mind from my assortment of friends and associates, would be the same way. The only rules would be no profanity, use common sense in what you say and do and don’t get us kicked off the air. Anything else is pretty much, “What the hell! Go for it!” Would that be a cool radio station to listen to or what?

As for who would be the on-air talents, I’ll name a few names and explain why. For the station manager and big boss, I have a co-worker who worked many years in the radio and entertainment business. He knows the technical stuff and the way things work in that business. He could oversee the ship and make sure it runs straight and doesn’t wreck on the shore if you will. Every family needs a parent and for my station, Benny would fill that role and keep everyone in line. As for talent, my boss man, Bill, would have the morning show. If you know Bill Bill, you already understand why. I have a buddy up north, Brent, and he would be the mid-day and early afternoon guy. He’s primarily a film maker and writer, but as he’s proven with his podcast series, SMF Cyberspace (cheap plug – go listen and enjoy), he’s such a well spoken and intelligent guy and would definitely be a hit with the listeners. My friend Tian, would work the late shift in a combination talk / music segment. If you know Tian, she can talk about anything and has such a soothing voice. Picture Delilah, a syndicated radio personality that does dedications and love stuff and crank it up about 150% and you have Tian. She is so awesome and such a strong personality. she’d be in syndication in no time and a major hit. My brother, Kenneth, would work the afternoon slots as well and you’d get a mixture of rap, old rock and lots of street love. Kenneth’s better half, Anna, could come on as desired as an authority figure and handle self-help and better-yourself discussions. And I’d do the occasional wrestling stuff and maybe some “Loveline” type deal with Ken, Brent, Tian and who knows who else in a roundtable discussion. Add a few new faces, who would have to undergo extensive interview processes, aka “make me laugh” and “make me go Hmmmm!” and there you go. So if I ever win that big lottery payoff, don’t walk but run to your radio. Hide the women and children and be afraid. Be very afraid.

Fireball…

It’s a popular alcoholic beverage that has the logo, “Tastes like Heaven. Burns like Hell!”. And it’s popular. Very popular. Everyone loves it and it is definitely one of the best selling flavored adult beverages available at the local liquor store. And the mascot is a devilish looking dragon (or is it a dragonish looking devil?). It’s good stuff. Drink it. Come buy it from me at the ABC store. And I can’t think of anything else at the moment and I’m getting tired so that’s all on this. Did I mention that it’s good stuff? Too much probably isn’t good for you, but the occasional weekend binge, it’s okay. I’ll give you permission just so long as you come to my register at the store. Did I mention you should buy it from me? I did? Okay then. Let’s move on.

District Attorney…

Our local D.A. is a woman named Kristy Newton. I don’t like her and think she’s a poor excuse for a DA. I had a long rant written, but then I had a memory of being taken to the tool shed over getting too political with the local stuff a couple of years ago and a promise that I made that I would behave myself and watch my tongue here at the site. So I’m deleting what I said and I’ll just say that Newton should be put out of office and replaced. If you want to know why, just ask. Scotland County deserves better. ‘Nuff said! And there you go.

And that’s all for me now. I’m down and gone. One down and a few more to go. Comments, thoughts and feedback is welcome. Until the next time, take care. Who loves you baby? Me! That’s who.

Ubuntu!

@00 @ 1 tawondr ccartney

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