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October 15, 2017
DougMaynard.com

Here are fifty of my favorite things…

Singer: There are many, but my “Big Six” are (and will always be) Alice Cooper, Waylon, Sinatra, Sublime, Rickie Lee Jones and Soce the Elemental Wizard.

Actor: My favorite actor will always be James Dean. Johnny Depp and Marky-Mark are pretty damn good too.

TV Show: Not counting wrestling and HGTV, I like Big Bang Theory and Family Guy..

Comic: Joan Rivers was the best there was, is and ever will be…

News Network: Fox News – always fair and balanced.

Football Team: Gotta support the home team – Carolina Panthers

Basketball Team: Don’t care for pro basketball, but in college, will always be a Tarheel til the day I die. UNC # 1…

Wrestler: Old school, it’s Arn Anderson and “The Living Legend” Larry Zbyszko – and of the current stars, how about Miz, Curtis Axel and Bo Dallas. I Bo-Lieve!

Food: I like chinese.. where my buffet at?

Drink: Pepsi

Car: A Volkswagen Beetle – the old ones that had style and personality…

Animal: The drummer from the Muppets

Plant: The Venus Fly Trap rocks… and eats meat… AWESOME!

Color: Black, Purple and Hot Pink

Swear Word: FUCK!

Smell: A fresh body, all soapy and clean, fresh out of the shower…

Store: The ABC Store – they give me money every two weeks and pay my bills. I like liquor too..

City: Wilmington, NC

Candy: The baby snickers are the best ones..

Beer: Bud Light

Meal: A plate from the buffet at the local Chinese place…

Cartoon Character: Marvin Martian

Super Hero: Iceman, Northstar, Dr. Druid and Mantis… (Look them up!)

Book: “Notes to Myself” by Hugh Prather & “The Vampire Chronicles” (a series) by Anne Rice.

Movie: Clerks (it’s my life)

Type of Music: I love everything, depending upon my mood, but the big band crooners from the 50’s and 60’s are the best…

Sport: Professional wrestling – the “King of Sports”…

Author: Anne Rice

Fruit: Richard Simmons… lol

Veggie: Potatoes are good…

Cereal: Trix – they’re not just for kids…

Barber Shop: Clips – Haircuts For Men – Scotland Crossing Shopping Center, 2 Doors Down From Food Lion… We Want To Cut Your Hair!

Activities: Writing, sleeping and getting funky like a monkey with a sexy man…

Website: DougMaynard.com (duh!)

Toys: My WWE Action Figures

Magazines: Rarely read them anymore, but The Advocate and Rolling Stone USED to be good. What the hell happened?

School Subject: English, History and Home Ec.

Crayons: I like the red ones…

Language: Klingon

Restaurant: Burger King if I have coupons. Other than that, Cook Out.

Snack Cake: Little Debbie Nutty Bars

Eye Color: Green eyes always get me in trouble…

Body Part: Butts and legs… and the eyes..

Soap: Ivory

Laundry Soap: Tide

Soup: Bean & Bacon has always been my favorite.

Pet: Goldy (my cat)

Snake: Sneaky Snake (a Tom T. Hall song reference – look it up!)

Bear: Care Bears rock!

Way To Relax: Sleep, write or have sex with sexy men…

Monster: Thotzilla (inside joke… lol) and Dracula, cause he’s the ultimate Vamp.

And there you go…

Ubuntu!