Hospital Chronicles: Part 2 – Legal Crime In Baltimore, Tiger King, Chicken Skin & More…

Tossing Salt Presents:
Hospital Chronicles: Part 2
Legal Crime In Baltimore, Tiger King, Chicken Skin & More
April 6, 2021
DougMaynard.com

Yes, I am still alive. I’ve been away for a few days due to problems with my foot, another surgery, and a whole lot of that depression/anxiety stuff. It’s been a hell of a week, but I kept it together and managed to survive. And now, we’re back.

While in the hospital for six very long days, with no computer, very limited television, and a lot of angst, I took notes and wrote down things that would come to mind. A lot of political stuff, a lot of common sense stuff, and a lot of what the hell stuff as well. My mind was bouncing around all over the place and the result was twelve sheets of paper, filled up on both sides, of rambling, scribbling, and Lord knows what else.

And now, it’s time to look back, quickly address each subject or topic, and talk about it for a few. “Why”, you ask? Because that’s what I do. There is no way to cover everything in just one blog, but I’ll tackle a few pages and then come back later for more in a future blog. It’s either do this or go sit in the dark in my room and wish I was dead. That already happens far too often so let’s ramble and rant and tackle these notes instead. So are you ready? Let’s do this.

We start off with something about how Baltimore will no longer prosecute charges for drug possession, prostitution, and other low-level offenses. What the fuck? Aren’t these still illegal and on the books? If the district attorney is choosing to not arrest and prosecute people who break the law, it’s a dereliction of duty and probably illegal as fuck. Laws are on the books and while I”m not an attorney or legal expert, I didn’t realize that officers and elected officials get to pick and choose what laws they’ll enforce and which ones they’ll just ignore. I don’t give a damn what their reasoning is or what excuses they have. This is just totally insane in every sense of the word. If they can’t enforce the laws, all of them, they don’t need to have that job or any position of power for that matter. Absolute insanity.

I watched the episode of South Park about being served. I laughed.

I think my friends Chris and Eric need to go watch videos of the great band, Dr. Hook. That’s the vibe I get from these two extremely talented and sexy men and I’d love to see them do a cover or two of some of Dr. Hook’s classics, complete with onstage antics and mannerisms. It would totally rock and be awesome. For me, please?

WWE rated the top 50 women of all time. Trish Stratus ranked #1 which is not a surprise. Sable was ranked #16. Yeah, I think someone was smoking some crack that day. And Sherri Martel, Ann Casey, Penny Banner, Baby Doll, Wendi Richter, Misty Blue, Peggy Lee Leather, and Rockin’ Robin are not listed at all. Put down the pipes, please. This list is absolutely stupid.

Joe Biden held a press conference. He had notes, pre-selected questioners to pick and answer, and pretty much not a damn clue. This is our President. We’re fucked!

Joe Exotic’s husband, Dillon, announced something about how he and the Tiger King are getting a divorce. Then he said something else on Twitter about how they’re not getting divorced. So who knows? I sure as hell don’t. But if Dillon needs a middle-aged, slightly psychotic man to help him get over this break-up if it does occur, I’m here. Just to be a friend of course. Do you know who’s fault all of this is? That bitch, Carol Baskin. That woman is a, pardon my language, absolute cunt.

Which show is more fun? Which is more original? South Park or Family Guy? South Park is more original, but Family Guy is usually more fun to watch. At least this week.

Is the chicken skin the best part? Maybe so, but I still like me some meat. A man can not survive on skin alone. Put the lotion on the skin or get the hose again. Damn, Precious was an annoying dog.

I wrote a poem while I was locked up at the hospital. Enjoy.
“I am so freakin’ ready to get out of here. Most likely it’ll be Friday morning. I’m going insane. Not even joking anymore. I have discovered hell and this is it. I’ll keep holding it in. I won’t snap. I’ll just do as I always do. Fake mask of jokes and smiles and every time the world looks away, I cry. Fuck this life. Fuck it all. ‘Nuff said.”

The service sucks. I don’t want to talk about it though. For some reason, I have “Klingon Bobbleheads”, “The Cheesecake Factory”, and “Riding down that goody trail” written down. No idea why. There is nothing weird about a random erection. I must have been watching South Park.

Why are there so many dead people on my Facebook friends list? What the fuck is “critical race theory”? I talked a bit about that in yesterday’s blog. And I wish Pastor Larry, who used to be over the Nazarene Church here in Laurinburg, was still around. I want someone to talk to and he’s a good man.

And that’s two more pages down. I’m ending here since it’s late and I have to be up early in the morning. My thanks for reading. Comments, thoughts, and any questions are welcome. More to come until I’ve gone over every page of my notes and scribbles from my hospital adventure. I’ll be back. Have a great night, stay safe, and I’ll see you on the other side. Take care.

Ubuntu!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.