Tossing Salt Presents:
A Day of Dougie:
Grass Fields, Tell Her About It & Dad Bods
December 7, 2022
DougMaynard.com

Good morning and welcome to A Day of Dougie. Yes, I know it’s been a while since I’ve done one of these, but the time for slackness is over. It’s time to get back to the one who brought me to the dance and what makes this site special. Well truthfully, it was wrestling and the “Tossing Salt – Worldwide News” columns that originally got me started with the writing so when I’m doing the Ultimate Wrestling Q&A thingies, I’m paying homage to my original love & claim to fame. But it’s the Day of Dougie columns that make this site unique and special. Anyone can write about wrestling, but there’s only one true and original Dougie and you’re looking at him. Well, you’re reading my words, but the same difference, right? Anyhow, long story short, too late I know, it’s time to get back to doing what I do best and that’s just being me. Hence, the Day of Dougie is back. ‘Nuff said!

For those of you that don’t remember, what I like to do, aside from ramble and just go on and on and on about anything and nothing at all, is go to the infamous Magic Bag, an old Crown Royal Bag filled with hundreds of slips of paper, each containing a single word or phrase, and drawing out three topics for discussion. And then, I write. No prior warning, no advance notice, or prep time. It’s just here are the subject and go. Sometimes inspiration will flow and we’ll get something awesome and magical. Sometimes I will have absolutely nothing and totally bomb. That’s the fun with this. I have no way of knowing what will happen as I write and I’m bringing you along for the ride. It’s a chance for you to take a look at the most random of things, all from a Dougie perspective. And it’s good for the environment too.

So enough of the chit-chat. Let’s go to the bag and see what we end up with. By the way, stick around to the end. We’ve got a major DougMaynard.com announcement coming up, but you’ll have to read all the way to the last few lines to see what it is. You’ve been warned. Now, let’s get the bag. And the topics of discussion for today are Grass Fields, TellHer About It, and Dad Bods. And now that we know what we’re talking about, let’s do this.

Grass Fields

Grass fields? What the hell do I know about grass fields? I know that cows and horses like to hang around in them and eat the grass. I’ve also seen many a movie scene where characters are running through the fields in their dreams. Why they’re running and how they run without falling or tripping over a snake that’s lurking in the tall grass, I have no idea. Maybe I’m just cynical, but I see a field of grass and it’s just weeds to me. And there are snakes, bugs, and probably a tiger stalking through that field as well, looking for fresh meat since that bitch, Carol Baskin, quit feeding it husband parts. Some people like fields, but I’ll pass. Too outdoorsy and too much nature for me. I’d rather be in my bed or on the couch. Let’s move on.

Tell Her About It

The title of an old Billy Joel song and very good advice. Don’t hide your feelings or take people for granted. If she’s awesome, tell her. If you appreciate her, tell her. If she’s great in bed, tell her. If she’s getting fat or her cooking sucks, don’t say anything. Honesty is always the key to a great relationship, but don’t be an ass about it. Here’s the song and video.

I can’t really talk about telling people anything because when it comes to relationships, I suck. I once had a guy I was involved with and cared for very dearly tell me that I was the most reserved person he has ever known. Unless I’m writing, I’m very withdrawn and build up walls to keep people out and push them away. There are a few people I’ll come out of my shell for, to a point anyhow, but I’m definitely guilty of not being as open and forthcoming as I can or should be. I need to work on that before I’m all alone with no one. Too late. Don’t be me. Tell her about it. Tell him about it. Just tell someone, damn it! Let’s move on.

Dad Bods

I like a little meat on my men. Dad-Bods are sexy! If you’re a dad, or just have a dad bod, and want me to critique it for you, send me a pic to my e-mail of Doug28352#yahoo.com and I’ll gladly do so. Or if you just want to send me a pic of your sexy-ass self, regardless of child status, do that too. I like sexy men. Did I mention that Dad-Bods are sexy? Well, now I have. Let’s wrap this up.

And there you go. Wasn’t that fun? Okay, don’t answer that. They can’t all be winners. Now let’s move on to the special announcement that I mentioned earlier. Starting Wednesday, December 14, 2022, and running through Saturday, December 24, 2022, it will be the Twelve Days of Dougie Christmas. Twelve Days of Dougie in a row and with at least one of the topics of discussion in every column will be Christmas related. So now you know so watch out for it. Tell your friends. It’s coming.

And now that you know, it’s time to close this up. My thanks for reading. Comments, thoughts, and any questions you may have about anything at all are welcome and appreciated. I’m out of here friends. Take care and be well and I’ll see you next time. I hope you have a great day and that we made you smile a little bit. I’ll catch you later gator.

Ubuntu!