Tossing Salt – Worldwide News: May 3. 2014

Tossing Salt – Worldwide News
May 3, 2014
Doug Maynard
 
Happy Saturday and welcome once more to the newest edition of pro wrestling’s most eclectic column, the always infamous “Tossing Salt – Worldwide News”.  I’m Doug and once again, it’s been a crazy week, both personally and in the world of the world’s oldest, and greatest sport.  I’ve got a lot of ground to cover with thoughts, questions, predictions for the WWE Extreme Rules “special event”, and a new “Who Am I?”.  Let’s just jump right to it, shall we?  Sounds like a plan to me.
 
Thoughts…
 
Great little endorsement by “The Nature Boy” Ric Flair for The Shield this past Monday on RAW.  Is Ric walking away from his former Evolution partners and jumping ship to the new generation of WWE superstars or is it all part of a ruse by the “dirtiest player in the game”?  Maybe we’ll find out on Sunday at Extreme Rules?  Or if the reports I’ve read this morning are true, maybe not.  
 
TNA is supposedly contacting woman wrestlers for a “One Night Only” style pay-per-view taping.  I don’t think we’ll be seeing Sara Del Ray, Mickie James, Victoria (Tara) or Daphney as part of the mix and it’s probably too soon to see Beth Phoenix return to the ring either.  But there are plenty of talented women out there and it probably won’t be too hard to find some top female stars to use.  I just hope we get a variety, a mix of old talent and new, to give us both name regognition and strong matches.  And wouldn’t this be a good place for cameos by past stars such as Lisa “Ivory” Moretti, Jazz, Kelly Kelly, Major Gunns, Aysa, Nidia, etc to pop up?
 
El Torito versus Hornswoggle at WWE Extreme Rules in a Wee LC match?  Should be match of the night and a potential match of the year candidate. I want to see this.
 
How long before we see either Daniel Bryan and Brie Bella versus HHH and Stephanie in a mixed-tag match or else Brie versus Stephanie in a singles match?  I want to see that happen too.  I can already hear Joey Styles in my mind screaming “CATFIGHT!!”
 
Kane is back as the monster.  I liked “Corporate Kane”, but now he’s come full circle back to his original character. Kane is the master of reinvention.
 
Was that the most awesome segment ever with The Wyatt Family and the children’s chorus opening up RAW this past Monday?  All those kids wearing the sheep mask and John Cena, and his facial expressions sold it perfectly.  A definite “RAW moment” that will long be remembered.
 
Hugh Jackman and Damien “Magneto” Sandow?  A “RAW moment” that is best forgotten quickly and never mentioned again.
 
What’s that I hear?  It sounds like a few…
 
Quotable Quotes Part I…
 
“You cannot achieve success without the risk of failure…You cannot achieve success if you FEAR failure.” – Paul Heyman
 
“When I die, I feel it won’t be from another’s sword but by the unstoppable heartbeat of dreams.” – Jake “The Snake” Roberts
 
“That was my heart and that was my passion. All I ever wanted to do is wrestle. I never wanted to pitch in Game Seven of the World Series, I never wanted to throw the touchdown in the Superbowl, I wanted to wrestle…Be a professional wrestler.” – Tommy Dreamer
 
Question Time…
 
Joshua Von Wheeler:  When did you start watching wrestling?
 
I’ve been a fan and watching wrestling since I was a baby.  I’m the youngest of five kids and three of the four were hardcore wrestling fans, thus it was always a part of our lives and I loved it from the very beginning and have never stopped.
 
Brian Green:  Are there any wrestlers you wish you never knew about them beyond kayfabe because the real person was such a letdown.
 
Obviously Ric Flair is the first name that comes to mind.  Such a great in-ring performer and talent and that can’t be denied, but then you hear about his personal life and the divorces, the lawsuits, the partying, etc…  Others would include Bret Hart, who’s a top in-ring talent, but again, his in-ring legacy seems to be overshadowed by his bitterness and whiney attitude.  The world was a much better and kinder place when kayfabe was alive and well and we knew the wrestlers through their characters and talent and could forget that they were real people, with issues, problems, warts and all.  That has killed a lot of the magic and it’s not as easy to suspend belief anymore.  That sucks!
 
Kristian Fager:  If you started a wrestling company today and every wrestler ever, in their prime, wanted to work for you, but you could only start your company with eight men, four good and four bad, who would it be?
 
That’s hard to say because every wrestler in their prime covers so much terrritory, but I’ll try and settle on my initial eight, with more to be brought in later of course.  My four “good guys” would be John Cena, Rick Steamboat, “Stone Cold” Steve Austin and Dusty Rhodes.  My “bad Guys” would be Ric Flair, Harley Race, Bruiser Brody and Roddy Piper.  And even though you didn’t ask, my four “women stars” would be Sherri Martel, Lisa “Ivory” Moretti, Victoria and Luna Vachon.
 
Fred Tobin:  Do women wrestlers, as a whole, have less exciting matches than men?
 
For the most part, yes.  While some women are capable of having strong matches and putting on a great show, the very style of women’s wrestling is less physical and their bodies aren’t quite as capable of doing the same things that the men are.  Also, the women wrestlers, these days especially, are hired more for looks and the whole T&A thing rather than for their athletic ability or talents.  The training is sub-par when compared to what most of the male wrestlers endure and it relects in the product.  There’s a place for women wrestlers in this sport and there are some talented and strong women out there, but the matches, in general, will never stand up to what we’ve grown to expect from the men’s matches and be considered, in a whole, as exciting.  Sad, but true.
 
And here’s some more words of wisdom…
 
Quotable Quotes II…
 
“I got sued more times than Martha Stewart.” – Paul Heyman
 
“We’re the greatest athletes in the world without a doubt.” – Hulk Hogan
 
“I’m sorry I only gave you 13 stitches, I meant to give you 36 or 38.” – Masked Superstar
 
“When I come after you I’m gonna be like a chicken on a junebug!” – Dutch Mantell (Zeb Colter)
 
And now, time to put on the “Sister Cleo” costume and pull out the crystal ball.  We’ve got a “special event” coming up on Sunday and that means prediction time.
 
WWE Extreme Rules Predictions…
 
WeeLC Match
El Torito versus Hornswoggle
 
This is a potential match of the year for me.  Okay, not really, but I am looking forward to seeing what these two men are capable of doing in the pre-show match.  I’ve always liked watching the little people perform, and no, I’m not talking about my ex, Danny.  Look for lots of comedy and lots of shenanigans from the side-kicks of both little guys in Los Matadores and 3MB.  And since you want the crowd to be happy and the show to start off with a bang, albeit a small one, I’m going with the faces to win and for Hornswoggle to feel a GORE! GORE! GORE!…
 
Winner:  El Torito
 
Jack Swagger w/ Zeb Colter versus RVD versus Cesaro w/ Paul Heyman
 
The key here lies with which way that RVD, as the only non-affiliated guy in the match, will go.  Will he resume his previous status as a “Paul Heyman Guy” or will he become a “Real American” with Swagger and Zeb?  Or will he be true to the extreme and look out for only one man, the guy with the thumbs and the initials R – V – D?  I think Zeb Colter and Paul Heyman will counter each other’s presence at ringside and it will fall to the men in the ring to get the job done.  And when push comes to shove, we’ll have Cesaro doing a remake of the old John Anderson song, “Swinging” as Swagger goes for a ride.
 
Winner:  Cesaro w/ Paul Heyman
 
Handicap Match:  Alexander Rusev w/ Lana versus R-Truth & Xavier Woods
 
It’s a shame that it takes two men to face one Bulgarian Brute or whatever the heck he is.  Hey Rusev, 1985 still wants their gimmick back.  It’s a shame to see how far that R-Truth has fallen.  Xavier Woods has never impressed me, not in TNA as “Consequences Creed” and not now.  The big man with the blonde chick playing Nanitchka 2014 version takes the easy win.
 
Winner:  Alexander Rusev
 
WWE World Championship Match
Daniel Bryan (c) versus  Kane
 
If Bryan loses, we riot!  ‘Nuff said!
 
Winner and STILL WWE World Champion: Daniel Bryan
 
Evolution (HHH, Batista, Randy Orton) versus The Shield (Roman Reigns, Seth Rollins & Dean Ambrose)
 
Old versus new.  Tradition versus The Future. Six of the very best in the business taking care of business.  What will happen?  Can Evolution stay together?  Will Ric Flair be involved?  Will HHH feel the “superman punch” or will the pedigree take it’s toll.  So many questions and the only thing for sure that we know it that it will be one helluva match.  I’ve heard that Batista is preparing to leave to take care of movie business, so I’ll assume that he eats the Trifecta power-bomb at the end of the night.  As for the match, things are just getting started.  I think that this battle goes to Evolution, but the war continues and we must believe in The Shield.
 
Winners: Evolution (HHH, Batista and Randy Orton)
 
Divas Championship:  Paige (c) versus Tamina Snuka
 
It’s too soon for Paige to lose and even though Tamina is well deserving, this is Paige’s time.  
 
Winner and STILL Divas Champion: Paige
 
Cage Match:  John Cena versus Bray Wyatt
 
Cena won at Wrestlemania XXX so it’s time for Bray to even things up here.  After all, he’s got the whole world in his hands.  Look for the sheep to have a great night as Wyatt (and Sister Abigail) take home the win and the mind-games and feud continue.
 
Winner:  Bray Wyatt
 
Intercontinental Championship:  Big E (c) versus Bad News Barrett
 
And finally, we have the Intercontinental Championship match.  Big E seems to have gone the way of other former IC Champs, with his star fading quickly even as he reigns as the number two champ in the WWE.  Big E is okay in the ring, but can anyone think of a great Big E match?  Or a great Big E promo?  He doesn’t have that “it”… not yet.  Barrett though has the look, the charisma, the promo ability and can get it done.  I think this is his time.  Hey Big E, we’ve got some bad news for you.  You’re going down!
 
Winner and NEW Intercontinental Champion:  Bad News Barrett
 
So there you go.  Am I correct in my predictions?  Am I crazy and wrong as hell?  Only time will tell and we’ll find out Sunday night.  Let’s wrap this baby up now.  That means it’s time for the…
 
Who Am I?
 
Last week, I asked you this…
 
I began my career in Florida in 1972 and had much success in the tag team ranks with a variety of partners. I also enjoyed some singles success as the NWA Junior Heavyweight Champion, a belt recognized in California and Florida and in New Japan, but not by the NWA as a whole. I eventually moved to Tennessee and found my niche as part of a fabulous tag team, a partnership that lasted nearly ten years until my partner decided he was more of a midnight type of guy.  I also moved on and reinvented myself as a tobacco spitting swamp man with a fondness for alligators.  I also clowned around a bit before heading back down south once more where I teamed with my former partner’s former partner and showed a little bad attitude.  After my in-ring career began to wind down, I opened a wrestling school in Florida and then eventually moved on to help train the NeXT generation of superstars, a role I hold today.  
 
And yeah, it was kind of on the easy side.  I admit it.  Correctly answering that the man I was looking for was Steve Keirn, were the following:  Harold Schwan, Andy Clarke, Ryan Rachal, Joe Hugelman, Brandon Hayes, Russell Jackson, Chad Burttram, Michael Materacky, Troy Miller and Larry Finder.  Great job Peeps and congratulations.  Well done.  Now here’s the newbie…
 
Long before there was a “Stone Cold” Steve Austin, I was cussing and swearing up a storm on TV in defense of my niece, my ray of “sunshine”, who had been run out of a Dallas based promotion by a future Freebird and his precious little valet.  I also had a great run against a “handsome half-breed” and a lady giant, as well as the trainer and mentor of “Stone Cold” and his valet / wife before losing a match and leaving the territory.  I was known as a 2×4 carrying former truck driver, but actually had an interesting career before then. I was trained by the legendary Mildred Burke and was the first female wrestler to go against Terrible Ted, The Wrestling Bear, in two matches in 1973.  I retired not long after my departure from Texas and passed away in 1996.  Who Am I?
 
Think you know this answer?  Give me a holler at Doug28352@yahoo.com and tell me who I’m speaking about.  Or else visit me at Facebook at facebook.com/saltpalace and inbox me with the answer.  
 
And with that, I’m out of here. I’ve got to go check on my people at work and get some breakfast in this growling stomach of mine.  I’ll be back later today with that “Fact or Fiction” thing that I do.  And I guess that’s it for now.  I’m Doug and “dat is all de’ people need to know!”.  I’ll catch you on the flip side.  
 
Ubuntu!
 
 

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