Thirty Days Of Dougie! (Day 24) – Childhood Memories, Boobies and Grocery List…

It’s a cold and windy day here in the city. Not really so much cold if it wasn’t for the wind, but with that strong breeze blowing, it’ll cut right through you. If you have to go outside today, bundle up. Or even better, do what I’m doing and not go outside… or anywhere. I’m not actually doing it because of the cold or the wind. I just don’t like going out in public and having to deal with people. I did it this morning, to do Food Lion for the Food Bank where I volunteer at, and to get drinks. I’ve fufilled my quota of socializing and social interaction for the day. No more and never again, until tomorrow at least. Oh wait, I promised my BFF / heterosexual life mate, the Jay to my Silent Bob, that I’d come over later to chill for a bit with him and the mini-me. Curses! Foiled again. So I will be doing some more human interaction later in the day, but since it’s Kenneth, it’s okay. He hates people almost as much as I do.

I am totally bummed out about something in the WWE. For close to a year, we’ve get getting hype for a match between the Big Show and former NBA star Shaquille O’Neill having a match at Wrestlemania. Show has worked hard and busted his ass to get in arguably the best shape of his career for this match. The man lost close to a hundred pounds and even has abs. And now, for reasons not yet disclosed, the match is off. Shaq and WWE couldn’t come to an agreement and Show will participate in the Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal instead. This is probably the first time in my life that I’ve ever been in any kind of anticipation for a match involving the Big Show. And it’s pretty obvious that he was looking forward and working hard towards it as well. And now, he’s just another body in a mass of bodies for a Battle Royal. There are just over two weeks left to go and I realize that finding a viable opponent for Show to work in a singles match wouldn’t be an easy task, but I hope that WWE will decide to do it. Braun Strowman would be a great pick, based on their match on Raw a few weeks ago, but it looks as if Strowman still has business with Roman Reigns and may end up being inserted into the Undertaker / Reigns match. So who could be called upon to give Show a good match of Wrestlemania quality at such short notice? Hmmmmm..

Looking at the current WWE roster, two names immediately come to mind. “The World’s Strongest Man” Mark Henry and Kane. Neither have been used much as of late with Kane taking some time off to handle personal matters and Henry just not being used, but either would be capable of having a strong and quality match with the “World’s Largest Athlete”, Big Show. Kane could just come out and make a challenge, bring up some past incident or reason, either real or kayfabe, and call out Show for a match. And Mark Henry? It’s no secret that he’s winding down his career and is ready to retire. Just have him come out on Raw, cut a promo and announce that he’s retiring, but wants to go with a bang at the biggest show of the year against the biggest opponent. He calls out Show and they make a match for Wrestlemania. And there you go, an instant classic with the World’s Strongest Man versus The World’s Largest Athlete in his last match. Break out the hankies. It’d work, be a big thing for the WWE fans, and would give Show (and Henry for that matter), a spotlight and place where they deserve to be.

And if neither of these ideas appeal to the WWE for whatever reason, just bring back The Great Khali and he can job to the Big Show in about fifteen seconds. Now that would be a Wrestlemania moment.

Imagine if you can, having no arms or legs. You’re blind and nearly deaf. Your face has been decimated and you have no eyes, no nose, no teeth. Where your mouth once was, is just a disfigured hole. But your mind, your brain, is in perfect working order and fine. What a living hell that would be. Metallica talks about this in their song, “One”, which is an incredible song and music video. And it’s all based on a movie, which was adapted from a book, called “Johnny Got His Gun”, a novel written in 1938 and published in 1939 by Dalton Trumbo. The movie version was released in 1971. I watched it last night after learning about it during a conversation with my brother. The movie is in black & white and is available on YouTube.

Man, this movie was an incredible psychological experience. The main character, Jon Bonham, was caught in an explosion and lost all of his limbs, but he still lives. He wants to die, but can’t and the movie follows his story as he drifts between fantasy and reality. He wants to die, but realizes that his caretakers, the Military, won’t allow him to. What’s real and what’s fantasy anymore? It’s not a life. It’s just total and pure hell given form. I can’t really explain this film and it’s not easy to watch, but I would still suggest that everyone do so at some point. It’s an anti-war film and really hits home with the pain and tragedy that comes with that particular subject. I can’t even begin to imagine living as Jon does, where the body is all but dead, but the mind is still there, alive, active, trapped. And the way it ends. S.O.S. – Kill Me! All I can say is, “Wow!”

I really do despise Rachel Maddow over at MSNBC. She’s a smug, arrogant joke who reminds me so much of Keith Olbermann, it’s not even funny. She wasn’t like this, at least not quite at bad, when she first started appearing on TV, but as the years have passed, she’s just become so sad and pitiful. She’s not a journalist and doesn’t even attempt to be unbiased or fair. At least Chris Matthews, another member of the clown show that is MSNBC, will show a little common sense every so often, but Rachel is so full of herself and determined to be right, she doesn’t care what she has to say or do, or how much or little of it is or isn’t true. Just give her that camera time and some ratings and credibility be damned.

Last night, she was so determined to make Donald Trump look bad. She had his tax returns from the year 2005. It’s a big, big scoop (that had been released by the Wall Street Journal over a year ago) and Rachel was going to reveal to the world what a lying, cheating fraud that Trump is. And what did she reveal after excessive hype and build? That Trump made money and paid close to $40,000,000 bucks in Federal Income taxes that year. That’s not counting the state and payroll taxes that he paid, but just the Federal. Trump paid roughly 25% of his income that year in Federal taxes. In comparison, President Barack Obama, in 2011, only paid 18% Federal income tax. And Bernie Sanders, the hero and idol to the poor, only paid 13% of his income in taxes. Thank you Rachel, for showing the world exactly what and who Donald Trump is. He was a successful businessman who paid his fair share of taxes. But can the same be said about Obama or Bernie? I’d love to see Rachel’s tax returns for that matter. But the point is, she tried to make Trump look bad and instead, she just made a fool of herself. And it couldn’t happen to a better joke of a commentator. Great job Rachel. Keep up the good work.

Have I mentioned lately that BD Productions and BDtv are back? Well, now I have. Go check out their Facebook fan page or track them down on YouTube. You’ll be glad you did.

I made spaghetti last night, but I didn’t have any spaghetti noodles. My beloved mother “loaned” the boxes I had stashed to my sister. That’s all good and cool, but after making a big pot of spaghetti sauce, with three pounds of meat, three pounds of Presto meat flavored sauce, a half an onion, two cans of diced tomatoes and a one pound jar of salsa mix, I had nothing to put it on. So I improvised. 4 boxes of the cheap Mac & Cheese mix. Pulled out the packs of fake cheese and put them away in the cabinet. Used all of the macaroni noodles and cooked them up. Add sauce and wala – dinner is ready. And guess what? That stuff is GOOD!

Can you telk that I don’t really feel like writing a blog right now? I’m just rambling instead, jumping around from topic to topic. I guess I should just say “screw it” and go ahead and get to the main part of this. I need to get the Magic Box and pull out a topic or two. Let’s do it. We have… “A Childhood Memory”, “Boobies” and “Grocery List!”. An interesting and diverse trio of subjects. This might be interesting…

Thirty Days Of Dougie! (Day 24) – Childhood Memory, Boobies and Grocery List…
March 15, 2017

Let’s start off with a childhood memory? Should I talk about the two older, teenage boys who were supposed to be baby-sitting, but instead used an 8 year old boy for their pleasures instead? Nah, I’m in a good mood today (surprisingly) and I don’t want to kill the vibe. That’s a blog for another day. How about this one. When I was maybe 11 or 12, I went to stay with my Dad for the summer. My parents were divorced and he had moved to Hurricane, West Virginia in order to be closer to his Mom and the rest of his family. I stayed with him and every weekend, we would ride over to my Grandma’s house in Ohio. He’d visit with his brothers and Mom and I’d play with my cousins, Clint and Cliff. This lasted most of the summer and then I came home, back to NC, to get ready for the school year. Dad told me that the week after I left to come back home, he went over to his Mom’s house to visit, and one of my cousins, not sure which one, asked him where I was at. He told them that I had come back home to North Carolina. And then, my cousin just asked, “then why are you here then?”. So I guess the only reason he was coming around every weekend was to bring me over, at least in their eyes. Dad said it caught him off guard, but he was laughing about it. I thought it was funny too. I haven’t talked to Clint in probably 25 years and only see Cliff on Facebook, although he seems to have vanished for a while now too, but for many years, we were very, very close. Those were (and are) some great guys. I miss them.

And next topic is “Boobies!”. I’m gay so no interest here. They’re nice to look at and fun to play with, but so are many other things. I’ll just say “Eh” to this and move on.

And finally, we come to “Grocery List!”. That’s the list we work on all week, constantly adding and subtracting items, determined to make sure we don’t forget anything when we make that dreaded trip to the grocery store. And then we leave the list laying on the counter at home when we finally do go to the store. And we just wing it. I wonder what will go on our grocery list for the Maynard household? I know we need eggs. We always need eggs. And spaghetti noodles since Ma keeps loaning them out to my sister. Ketchup is a necessity and we can’t forget bread and milk. After all, we still might get some more snow and need to be prepared. Apple sauce, crackers, hot dogs and peanut butter are all must-haves that go on the list. And I want some egg rolls. And that’s more than enough for now. I’m getting hungry. Time to go munch some of that macaroni noodle spaghetti I fixed last night. Did I mention, that stuff is GOOD!

And that’s all for today, my friends. Day 24 is in the books and I’ll be back tomorrow with a new edition of “Thirty Days!”. Have a great one and don’t eat the yellow snow.


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