Retro: Rant From 8 Years Ago Today…

The Rant (Will Someone Put A Muzzle On This Guy?)

Salutations, good evening and someone let the cat out. It’s been far too long since I’ve just sat down and cut loose. So I’m going to do just that on a whole plethoria of topics. some of which you may find interesting and others, no one cares about, but me. But that’s fine and good, because it’s my blog. So there you go. Let’ s do this.

Jeff Hardy is one of the most stupid of the stupid right now. I will even go so far as to give him a new name. He is no longer “Jeff Hardy”. He is now “Dummy Dumb Dumb Hardy”.

The man had silenced all of his critics. He was a three-time WWE Champion. He left the company (WWE) on his own terms with a standing offer to return at any time he chooses. A DVD about him was due out for the holidays. He was being represented by the world-famous William Morris agency and being offered spots on TV. He has his own band and they were about to begin touring and recording, with the full backing of the WWE Media Machine behind them. He had a potential reality series that was being shopped around.

And then he gets a little visit from the local Sheriff’s Department.
And lo and behold, what do they find but 262 Vicodin Pills, 180 Soma Pills, Steroids and Cocaine residue. What the hell? What are you trying to do, Jeff? Start your own pharmacy?

If it was just a few pills, it wouldn’t be a big deal. I’m sure that Jeff can come up with a prescription to cover SOME of the pills, but that many? Two soma will knock you on your ass and have you drooling like an idiot for several hours – there is no reason for anyone to have 180 of them.

Guess what, Jeff… you’re fucked.

I have actually grown to like watching the man wrestle. He’s a very talented and unique individual. And I have no doubt that when all is said and done, his high priced lawyers will manage to explain and come up with excuses for the majority of the charges. And then it will be plea bargained down and reduced to a fine and community service and buried under the rug, much like the man’s head when it comes to admitting that this is NOT normal and he has a problem that needs to be addressed.

I hope Jeff does eventually get his life straight and makes a big comeback, be it in the WWE, TNA or elsewhere. But he’s hurt and betrayed the trust of so many right now – his family, his peers, his fans, etc… it’s not going to be easy. And that’s not even mentioning the potential millions of dollars this little adventure is going to end up costing him.

Everyone makes mistakes, but even by the most casual of standards, this is a doozy and a half. I guess Jeff was thinking that he’s Jeff Hardy and just because others get in trouble for this kind of thing, it can’t happen to him. Well, it can… and it did. So what’s next, Jeff? What’s next?

Went to the free dental clinic this past Friday. It was an adventure in chaos and confusion. From standing in line for hours, to being shuffled from area to area and room to room, it was an exercise in patience. But I survived and endured and in the end, the choppers got cleaned up a bit. They look better. I feel better. And if I ever get bored, I’ve got one helluva long story to write and tell about my most excellent adventure. But not now.

Who saw the MTV Video Music Awards and saw that stupid bastard, Kayne West come up on stage and ruin Taylor Swift’s big moment as she was trying to accept the award for Best Female Video. I think that Pink said it best when she called West a “piece of shit” immediately afterwards on her Twitter account. How dare that idiot ruin Taylor’s moment?

He didn’t think that Taylor had the best video? So what? I don’t think he’s much of an entertainer or singer myself and feel he belongs in a cage at the zoo. But what I think about him and what he thinks about her doesn’t matter. She’s a 19 year old girl who won this award, fair and square. She was having a big moment in her life and he just jumped up there and shit all over her, her moment, country music and women in general. He needs to have his ass kicked… repeatedly. And I’m not by nature a violent person, but in that stupid self-made son of a bitch’s case, I’m more than willing to change my mind.

I do find it kind of ironic that of all the performers being presented awards, it was a young, nineteen year old girl he decided to crash upon. Why not do it to one of the metal acts? Why not crash the stage when Eminem was up there? How about going up onstage and pulling that crap while Madonna or Pink or Janet Jackson was up there. Nope, because they would have put him in his place right then and there for all the world to see and Pink probably would have kicked his ass.

Kanye picked his spot and the one person who he could walk over, just like the manipulative, sorry low-life scumbucket that he is. His people are making excuses, but he knew exactly what he was doing. He got a ton of publicity, re-established himself as a “big, bad man who can intimidate a young girl” and pissed a lot of people off. Good job, West. I know your deceased mother would be so proud of you.

No, she’d probably tell you that you’re being a stupid ass idiot and a total dick-weed and that you need to have your ass kicked, stomped, beaten and whipped. And then, let the punishment begin.

Hey Kanye, next time you get the urge to rush the stage and ruin someone’s big moment, why not go do it at a Toby Keith concert or maybe a Hank Williams Jr. show. And allow those gentlemen to show you the same hospitality and respect you showed Taylor Swift. Go ahead, big man. I dare you!

By the way, big time kudos to Beyonce for inviting Taylor out later in the evening to try it again and accept her award and have her moment. Beyonce is a classy lady and earned much respect for doing that.

For those of you wondering where my predictions were for this past Sunday’s WWE PPV, Breaking Point, I didn’t bother doing them. I had absolutely no interest in the PPV or any of the matches so I just didn’t bother. And you know it’s bad when I, one of the biggest “wrestling fans” around, doesn’t care anymore. Actually, I was interested in the Christian – William Regal match, but the rest of it…. blah! Too much “sports-entertainment” and not enough “wrestling”. Fix it Vince or else step aside and let someone take control who actually can.

Rob Thomas is just an amazing talent. Great songs – great lyrics. He reminds me of a 2009 version of Phil Collins(from the eighties) in that it seems that everything he releases is just good stuff and tops the charts. Except that Phil was a great singer, but ugly as sin. Rob is pretty easy on the eyes. I wonder how long it is before Rob scores himself an Oscar too for a movie song?

Gretchen Wilson would totally kick Kayne West’s ass!

I got hit on at work the other day… by an 18 year old boy. Well, he might be 19, but still… What the…? He’s cute enough, but I don’t think messing around with someone who is young enough to be my son is that good of an idea. Been there and done that and while it has some good points, the cons eventually overtake the pros and it becomes a messy situation in the end. So thanks, but no thanks. I’ll pass. I have a person in my life anyhow. (But I”ll hold on to that phone number anyhow, just in case…lol).

My prayers and condolences to the family and friends of writer, poet and rocker Jim Carroll, who passed away this past Friday at age 60. If the name sounds familiar, it’s probably because of an excellent movie called “The Basketball Diaries” that starred Leo DiCaprio and Marky Mark. It started off as a journal, ended up being published as a book and then came the movie.

I’ve seen the movie probably a dozen or more times. I’ve read the book (found it at the library of all places – very graphic and very riveting) – and I’ve even read some of his poetry. He also made albums, but I have to admit that I’ve never listened to any of his music, aside from the movie soundtrack.

But I saw the news that he had passed away and it just jumped out at me and I felt a piece of something fall away from my soul and heart. Maybe it was just the movie based on his life. It was that good. I don’t know, but I’m feeling a big loss here.

Jim Carroll – Rest in Peace…

I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention actor Patrick Swayze, who passed away earlier last night after a long and grueling battle with cancer. Like most, I first became aware of Swayze through the movie “Dirty Dancing”. Actually I remember him from before then, along with Rob Lowe in “Youngblood”. And then it was “Roadhouse” and then “Ghost”, and about thirty other movies. The man never stopped working.

Swayze was a great actor, a good singer, and a true class-act in the crazy world of Hollywood. He was just a real guy with a lot of charm, charisma, talent and abilities. And we were lucky enough that he shared them with us for far too brief a time.

Rest in Peace Patrick Swayze – you’ll be missed.

Jay Leno is back on TV and he’s on Prime Time. Did you know that? Did you even care? No, me neither. Fuck you, Leno for disrespecting Carson all those years ago. He gives you “The Tonight Show” and as soon as it becomes Leno’s show, Carson is never mentioned again on the show… until he died. Yeah, too little – too late. Letterman is funnier anyhow. So is Conan. And Craig Ferguson cracks me up. That man is insane. Who needs Jay Leno?

Hey Kayne – how about going on-stage during an Alice Cooper show? He has a snake and a guilliotine too. I’m sure he’d love to make you as part of his act. Just imagine it – the big bad thug getting his ass whooped by a skinny guy named Alice? It’d be great!

If you get the chance to go to YouTube, check out the antics of Brad & Derk – the team of BD Productions and their BDTV Segments. You will laugh. You will learn. You will want to piss yourselves. They are hilarious. And they’re also great wrestlers too.

Speaking of great, my bud and lifelong friend Andy Singer, aks “soce the elemental wizard” has a new CD out called “Master of Fine Arts”. I have my copy and it’s just an amazing and fantastic piece of work that truly transcends everything on the radio today. It’s serious, funny, smart, silly and just damn good – all wrapped up in one package. This man has skills! Plus he’s truly a nice guy too – what a package that has to be witnessed to be believed.

Check his music out at I-tunes if you can or just go ahead and buy the CD – you can get it from or else from the man himself, Soce – at

Soce would kick Kayne’s ass too – and Soce gets along with everyone.

Why aren’t there any good cartoons left on TV on Saturday morning anymore? Everything is “educational” and “claymation” and “stupid as hell” now. I miss the days of Bugs Bunny, Scooby Doo and even Fat Albert & The Cosby Kids. Now those were educational and fun Saturday morning cartoons and shows. And Dora the Explorer – you suck ass!

Sinatra has been dead for ten years – and he’s STILL the man! Just saying.

Hey Cal – guess what? I love you, guy and you’re still stuck with me. Bwah-ha-ha-ha! So get used to it.

And you know what? I guess I’ve rambled enough. I hope I haven’t bored everyone too much. I guess this is the end for now. So until the next time…

Wouldn’t it be nice if Candy Corn was available year round?


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