Mayo vs Miracle Whip, Dead Babies & Waylon Super Groups…

From 5 years ago today…

Thirty (More) Days of Dougie – Part 30: Mayo vs Miracle Whip, Dead Babies and Waylon Super Groups

It’s that quiet piece of time where no one else in the house is up and awake yet and the birds are chirping, the school buses are running and I’m just full of reflection and introspection.  This is my time of day.  I wish it could stay like this all the time, but even a scene this serene and peaceful would get old after a while.  I guess I’d best just enjoy it while I can.

Something else that I’d best do while I can is sit here and do the final part, Part 30 for those of you keeping count, of the infamous “Thirty (More) Days of Dougie” series.  This will be the 68th thing I’ve written / posted in the past two months and hopefully, it’ll past the muster and be worth reading.  Hope so anyhow.

So what’s the topic? Hell if I know.  I’m doing good just by being up and awake and active at this time of the day.  Whatever it is though, it’ll be a short one because my hand is throbbing and hurting like a biatch and I’m completely out of painkillers.  I’ve got some of the cheap, over the counter stuff from Dollar General and that will work, I guess.  The good stuff all vanished quickly like stars in the night sky when my concern for others overcame my desire for personal comfort and lack of personal pain.  I’d rather hurt myself than see someone I care about hurt.  And I really shouldn’t be talking about this here so let me move on.

I created a new blogsite yesterday where all of my “Thirty Days” and “Thirty (More) Days” blogs can live and be enjoyed forever. It’s at and it’s  lot like / blogger used to be before Google decided to “improve” everything.  A nice, simple little page where you will be able to go for videos and pics I like, as well as any and all things “Dougie” in the written sense. I’ll have the link on my Facebook page for that page and will be plugging the heck out of it eventually as well.  Crap!  I need to go take my meds (for diabetes and for the infection that’s killing my hand) so I’ll be right back.  And then we’ll go into the magic box and find a topic for “Part 30” as well.  Don’t go away.

By the funny, isn’t it odd watching Kal Penn on episodes of House M.D.?  This is Kumar from the Harold and Kumar movies and he’s a doctor working for House?  I like watching him on the show and it’s all cool and stuff, but just a little odd as well.  Just saying.

Also, speaking of odd, Alice Cooper and Marilyn Manson will be touring together later this year.  The master and the student. Maybe Alice will be able to show Marilyn what being a true rock star and legend really is all about.  It should be an interesting show.

Let’s reach into the magic box.  And the topics of the day are, my choices to pick from actually, are… “Mayonnaise versus Miracle Whip”, “Dead Babies” or “Outlaw vs. Highwaymen vs. Old Dogs”.   These are three weird topics, but what the hell.  I choose… all three. Let’s do this…

Thirty (More) Days of Dougie – Part 30:  Mayo versus Miracle Whip, Dead Babies & Waylon Super-Groups

The first thing we have is mayonnaise versus Miracle Whip.  And to be honest, for me, there really isn’t too much of a difference.  Mayo is a little more oily perhaps and has a bit more of a blunt taste, but when push comes to shove, they’re essentially the same thing.  Need to make some deviled eggs or chicken salad?  Either one works.  Need to spice up that BLT?  Just grab the jar with the white stuff and you’re good to go.

In actual taste, I think the Miracle Whip is slightly better.  It’s a twee bit sweeter (like Pepsi compared to Coke) and I believe I’ve read somewhere that it’s actually better for you than Mayo – better on the cholesterol and fatty acids, but that’s all moot for me. Whichever one is on sale and I happen to grab hold of first, that’s the one I’m getting, be it mayo or Miracle Whip.  Same difference.  ‘Nuff said!

As for “dead babies”, that comes from an old Alice Cooper song from 1972, I believe.  The song focused on child abuse and neglect and how some people just don’t have any kind of love or care for children and shouldn’t be parents.  And of course, it was done with an Alice twist, making him the “bad guy” and cementing the twisted and deranged Alice persona at the time.



It baffles my mind sometimes how anyone though, could ever knowingly hurt a child.  Adults are stupid and if they get busted in the face, so be it.  Who cares.  But children, especially the smaller ones, are trusting and adorable and only looking for love and guidance.  And yes, it can be annoying sometimes, but that’s why we’re supposed to be the adults.  We’re supposed to be able to take care of and look after our children and offer them guidance, discipline, comfort and love.  And if that’s too much for someone with children to understand, then they don’t need to be a parent and have children.  It’s just that simple.

In Alice’s song, for which I’ll post the lyrics, the children are ignored and not wanted.  Pay attention to that young-un, people.  It’s too easy to turn that head for a second and bad things to happen.  It’s a great song and really hits home, in typical tongue in cheek Alice fashion, about just how bad things can get very quickly.  It’s one of my favorites.  Here’s the lyrics.

Dead Babies – Alice Cooper

Little Betty ate a pound of aspirin. She got them from the shelf upon the wallBetty’s mommy wasn’t there to save her. She didn’t hear her little baby call

Dead babies can’t take care of themselves Dead babies can’t take things off the shelf Well, we didn’t want you anyway La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la

Daddy is an agrophile in Texas Mommy’s on the bar ‘most every night Little Betty’s sleeping in the graveyard Living there in burgundy and white

Dead babies can’t take care of themselves Dead babies can’t take things off the shelf Well, we didn’t love you anyway La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la

Goodbye, little Betty Goodbye, little Betty So long, little Betty So long, little Betty Betty, so long

Dead babies can’t take care of themselves Dead babies can’t take things off the shelf Well, we didn’t need you anyway La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la

Goodbye, little Betty

{Order in the court Order in this court room Order, outside the court Order in the court, sit back}

And then we have the final topic, which I referred to in the title as the “Waylon Super-Groups”.  This was on the slip from the magic box as “Outlaws versus Highwaymen versus Old Dogs”, all of which were three loosely based super-groups that all had one factor in common, namely the late, great Waylon Jennings.

The Outlaws was a concept for an album featuring Waylon, Willie Nelson, Jessi Colter and Tompall Glaser that ended up being the first country music album ever to go platinum.

The Highwaymen was Waylon, Johnny Cash, Willie Nelson and Kris Kristofferson, four long time friends, getting together for a show and just running wild with it, resulting in three albums and a major tour.

And then we have the “Old Dogs”, which was just a loosely based gathering where Waylon, along with Jerry Reed, Bobby Bare, Mel Tillis and Shel Silverstein got together and cut several tongue-in-cheek tracks about aging and getting old and left the tape machines running, putting the recorded material out on two CD’s. They never toured or did anything formally together.  It was just some old friends getting together and cutting the fool as only old friends can do, but recording it all for our entertainment and pleasure.

So what’s the difference?  The Outlaws were a concept, the Old Dogs were shenanigans and the Highwaymen were four of the very best singers / songwriters / entertainers of all time, making some excellent music.  Waylon was a part of all three cause Waylon was just that damn good!

And do I have a favorite “grouping” here?  Yep!  Am I going to tell you who it is?  Nope!  All I’ll say is that if Waylon was involved, it was good music and well worth listening too.  ‘Nuff said!

And with that, I’m closing this up.  That’s the end of “Thirty (More) Days of Dougie”, but definitely not the end of my writing spurts.  I’m not going anywhere and already have several other pieces / projects in mind.  Have a great day and I’ll catch you later.



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