12 Dougie Days Of Christmas – Day 4: War On Women, Shower Singing & Radio Shows…

12 Dougie Days Of Christmas
December 10, 2018
Day 4: War On Women, Shower Songs & Radio Shows
DougMaynard.com

Greetings and welcome to Day 4 of a blog series dedicated to an eclectic life full of love, joy, happiness, jelly beans and all things Dougie. Yes, I’m still here and I’ve got it going on with my Christmas present to all of y’all and myself as well, twelve days of Dougie in a row. Wham! Can you stand it? I’ve broken out the “Magic Bag” and we’re counting down the days, but never forget, Jesus is the way. I’m feeling a bit spiritual this lovely morning. I’m not a religious person by nature and I personally feel that most organized religion is suspect, but I am thankful for what I have, the people in my life and the direction my life is headed these days. God is good. And with that in mind, let’s move on and get this piece out of the way. Let’s do this…

So what do we have from the “Magic Bag” as we try to determine what the agenda and topics of the day will be. I reach into the bag and this is what we’ve come up with. We have “War On Women”, “Singing In The Showers” and “Radio Shows”. Hmmmm. I wonder where these topics will take us? There is only one way to find out and that’s to get on with getting on and do this. So, let’s do this. And away we go…

And now, it’s nearly 10:00am on a lovely and wet Monday morning. I typed up my intro last night and then decided to go check my phone for something and well, I got distracted and then went to bed. And now, I’m sitting here waiting on a phone call from my boss at work. We’re suposed to have a truck this morning and normally, it would be here around 6:30am. But due to the snow and bad weather conditions in Raleigh, we’re not expecting it this morning until around 11:00 or 12:00 at the earliest. I still have to go do Food Lion this morning too.

And as I wrote this, the boss just called. The truck will be here around 10:00am. Then when that’s finished for me, I go do Food Lion, come home for a quick shower if possible and then back to work at 4:00 til closing. After work, it’s Wal-Mart to pick up some prescriptions and gatorade and then it’s home tonight for one last meal (the meal of the condemned) before I go into a starving / poop frenzy while preparing for Wednesday. This will be a busy and stressful day. I’m already stressing out. Oh vey!

I already have my topics though so let’s just get to it and I’ll keep it all short and sweet today since I have to hurry. So are you ready? Let’s do this.

War On Women…

There was a time when women were considered second rate in many ways. They were the weaker sex and didn’t get the promotions, got paid less than men, were expected to do all the cooking, cleaning, raising of children, etc. I think John Lennon said it best at the time when he said that women “are the niggers of the world”. Is that still true though? Is there still a war on women, if you will? Maybe in a few places, but for the most part, women today are considered the strong ones. They get sick and work through it while a man crumbles and becomes a crying little baby over a head cold. Women are just as smart, just as powerful and generally far more resliiant than men could ever hope to be. Do some women get treated less than fairly? Absolutely. Is it right? Not at all. But the world is changing and evolving every day and more and more people realize that it’s not the gender of the person that makes then relevant, but the character and person inside. Hell, women have it made. Almost any relationship, who makes the majority of the decisions for the couple? The man might think he does, but that’s only because the woman lets him think so to protect his fragile male ego. The women are sneaky and subtle, but they rule. Truthfully, it’s more of a war on men these days cause no matter what we do, she won’t be happy and we’re wrong. If you’re a man, you know what I’m talking about and if you’re a woman, you get it too, but won’t ever admit it. And this is turning into a ramble so let’s move on.

Singing In The Shower…

Why is it that when a person is in the shower, surrounded by the ceramic tub and the running water, no matter how badly they truly sing, they think they sound good? Does the water clog up the ears or something or is it just the acoustics that make our voices sound a hundred percent better when we’re covered with soap, shampoo and standing around naked and wet? I sing in the shower, belting out the sounds of Sinatra, Waylon, Willie, etc and I sound damn good. I should be in a recording studio making albums. I sing in the car and it’s the same thing. Justin Timberlake, eat your heart out. But then I listen to myself singing on tape and it sounds like three rabid cats having a cat orgy on top of a John Deere tractor with a busted engine that’s trying to overheat. I used to sing good. Now, with the exception of when I’m in the shower, not so much. Why is that? What’s the difference? It’s something I’ve always wondered and pondered about. I wonder if we’ll ever find out why a person is Bono when wet and Kanye without auto-tune when not. It’s just like that question about how many licks it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll pop. The world may never know. Next…

Radio Shows…

With the exception of talk radio and satellite, there really aren’t that many radio shows out there anymore. There are the morning drive-time shows like Bob & Sheri, John Boy & Billy’s Big Show and that racist show on Foxy 99 that I can’t even bother remembering the name for, but they hate white people. It’s a sad world because everything is now computer programmed and instead of personalities and characters, you just get “music sets” and “more music”. I guess that’s good, but I grew up listening to people like Murphy In The Morning from Charlotte and Pat Patterson in Raleigh and these folks were personality and charisma and became part of your lives and daily routine. It was a good time to be alive.

If I had a radio station, where money wasn’t an issue, I’d have it be character and personality based more than anything else. I’d want old fashioned DJ personalities to work their shows, interact with listeners and keep it interesting and real. I know enough people who are clever, charismatic, talkative and entertaining that I could staff a station easily and change the world. I’d love to do just that and if I ever win the Powerball Jackpot and have money, that’s the type of thing I’d be wanting to do.

And that’s all on that. I know it’s short today and not really saying nothing and I apologize, but I need to get moving and get out of here to do stuff. Thank you for reading and I’ll catch you on the flip side. Questions, comments and any ideas for topics to write about, let me know. Have a great one and stay safe, warm and dry. Take care.

Ubuntu!

@00 1 1 hard candies meme

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