Questions By Casper #46

Tossing Salt Presents:
Questions By Casper #46
September 26, 2020
DougMaynard.com

Over in the world of Twitter, I found a man that likes to ask questions. And I do mean a lot of them. His name is Tyler “The Ghost” Casper and he’s at @tyler_casper. A good guy that you should go check out. Now, as I was saying, he likes to ask questions. I like to answer them and it provides content for the site. So here we are. Every few days, I go down his feed and copy the inquiries he’s asked. And then it’s here for the answers. It’s insightful, thought-provoking, and hopefully entertaining for you, the reader, as well. So let’s can the chit chat and let’s do this. Are you ready? And away we go…

Have you ever had body parts replaced?

Do I look like freakin’ Frankenstein to you? Ok, so maybe I am wearing matching Frankenstein boots, but I’m still a human, damn it. I’m not an animal or artificial being. I have my own legs, arms, hands, feet, head, etc. It’s all real and original parts on this broken-down body.

What is the best dog breed?

All dogs are cool because they’re dogs, but I’ve always had a warm place in my heart for German Shepards. Those are some very intelligent and beautiful animals.

What is the best cat breed?

The black ones.

What is the meanest cat breed?

If you’re that bitch, Carol Baskin, I would say the tigers. She uses them to eat her husband. Tigers are beautiful, but they are too damn moody and temperamental for my taste.

Do you have to wear a mask where you work?

Yes, we do and we also have to enforce that piece of crap rule with all of our customers as they enter the store where I work. I hate these damn things, but I would hate being unemployed even more so I’m wearing them while at work and when I enter a business that requires them. I don’t like it though.

What is the meanest dog breed?

Chihuahuas. Those little bastards are mean and will tear an ankle up.

What is the most friendly cat breed?

Friendly cats? Ha ha ha ha! What is this fictional creature of which you speak? Cats are assholes… period. And if they are nice, it’s only because they’re trying to get something or make you let your guard down. That’s why we love them though. Because they’re real.

What is the most friendly dog breed?

All dogs are friendly, except for the chihuahuas. Mean little bastards.

What is the ugliest cat breed?

Cats are beautiful and there is no such thing as an ugly cat.

What is the ugliest dog breed?

The same goes for dogs. Beautiful animals.

What is the cutest cat breed?

Not a breed, but when they are kittens, they live, breathe and personify cuteness.

What is the cutest dog breed?

Same thing as my previous answer. Puppies are adorable.

What is something you do just to brighten your spouse’s day?

Wake them up with some morning hea… ummm, none of your business.

Do you have a love seat?

Yes and it has witnessed plenty of love over the years. Sleeps good too.

How long are you going to wear a mask and follow the city limitations on your freedom?

At work, until my boss tells me I don’t have to anymore. I hate it, but I respect my boss and enjoy my job (and the money it brings me) so I won’t rock that boat. The mask thing sucks though.

Do you have a couch?

Nope. Just two chairs and a love seat.

If you were a chess piece, which one would you be?

Dougie just a pawn in the game of life. Oy vey!

Which Harry Potter is your least favorite?

I liked most of them, but if I have one I watch less than the others, it would be the last two of the movie series.

Which Harry Potter is your favorite?

I like the Chamber of Secrets movie. Moaning Myrtle reminds me of some people I know.

What is your least favorite kind of yogurt?

I had coffee flavor once. It was not good.

What is your favorite kind of yogurt?

Either lemon or blueberry.

What is something you think the world doesn’t need another of?

Fake-ass hypocrites in professional sports who make ungodly amounts of money, but then complain about how they’re discriminated against and how the world “owes them” and how unfair life is. Lebron, Colin Kaepernick, the players and coaches of the Miami Dolphins, etc. I have no use for any of those bastards.

What is something you think the world really needs right now?

God and prayer. And maybe a little self-respect and desire to do things and accomplish rather than dwell in the belief that the world owes anyone anything. Newsflash. No one owes you anything. Life is tough. Deal with it and quit complaining or making excuses.

What is the worst haircut/style you’ve ever had?

I was bald. Not a good look for me at all.

What is the best haircut/style you’ve ever had?

I used to have a rat-tail that could wrap around my neck. Maybe it was nerdy, but I liked it.

Do you have Velcro shoes?

They’re the only ones that will fit my misshapen, crippled up feet. And both of my Crow Boots use velcro as well. So that would be a yes or else I’d have to go barefoot all the time.

How is your short term memory?

I can’t remember shit!

How is your long term memory?

I can’t remember shit!

And there you go. My thanks for reading and thanks to Casper for the great questions. Any comments, thoughts, or questions about anything, feel free to drop me a line using the comment box below, my e-mail of Doug28352@yahoo.com, or Twitter at @Doug28352. Until the next time, take care of yourself and watch out for the crazies. Stay safe and I’ll see you on the flip side.

Ubuntu!

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