Flashback: Thirty Days Of Dougie: The Job (2013)

Tossing Salt Presents:
Flashback: Thirty Days of Dougie (2013)
The Job
DougMaynard.com

Way back in 2013, only eight years ago but it seems like a lifetime, I did one of many “Days of Dougie” blog series. But the thing is, I didn’t have this site yet and did them on my Facebook in the “Notes” section. And now that they’re showing up in my memories on Facebook, I think it’s time to share them one more time. So here you go. For the next thirty days or so, along with the current and new stuff I post on the site, we have some flashbacks as well. You’re welcome. Now, as I once heard said in the movie “Young Guns”, “Regulators, let’s move out!”. It was something to that effect anyhow. Let’s do this.

Thirty Days of Dougie: Part 1 – “The Job”

And it’s time for the madness to begin.  It’s “Thirty Days of Dougie:  Day 1” and I’m ready to get this bad mama-jama started.  What?  You didn’t get the memo?  Well, let me explain exactly what this is all about.  I used to write quite frequently.  It was wrestling columns, short stories, surveys, rants and raves, recipes, etc…  etc.  It didn’t matter what the topic was – I would write about it.  And all was good with the world.  

And then I got lazy.  My mojo got mojo’ed out and the magick went away.  And now, it’s time to get that mojo and magick back.  So what I’m doing is essentially jumping back into the game head first and am going to attempt to once more be the most eclectic (and InFamous – ain’t that right K-Mak?) writer / blogger / commentator on the block.  I’m back!!

And what’s the “Thirty Days of Dougie?”, you ask.  Well, I’ve got a small box full of several hundred pieces of paper.  And on each paper is a word or words with a topic. And completely at random, I will reach into the box each day and pull out one of these small pieces of paper.  And whatever that topic is, that’s what I’m going to write about.  And I’m going to do this every day for the next thirty days and see what we end up with.  Hopefully, it won’t be too awful… lol.

And now that I’ve explained exactly what I’m doing, it’s time to quit with the procrastination and get to stepping.  So let’s reach into the box and see what topic I’m going to be talking about today.  And here we go.  The topic is… “The Job”.

Okay, I can easily do this one.  So let’s begin…

Thirty Days of Dougie:  Day 1 – “The Job” January 3, 2013

First questin has to be, “what job are they talking about?”.  Is it my “pay the bills” job, my “volunteer” job, my “I do it because it keeps me sane” job, my “dream / fantasy” job, or maybe it’s talking about something dirty like a… Ok, I’m not even going to go there.  It just says “my job” so I guess that means I can take it anywhere I choose to.  What fun.

So let’s just tackle all of the possibilities.

My “Pay The Bills” job:  This is the one that takes up most of the time and makes the rest of them possible. And for me, it’s playing cash-register monkey / peon at your friendly neighborhood convenient store. Yeppers, I’m the one who takes your money when you buy those cigarettes and taters and tries to be friendly (most of the time) when you’re too busy talking to your friends and on that damn cell phone to even acknowledge my presence (unless I screw something up. That, you notice).  It’s a pie-job that requires few skills pays badly and has no future.  And I’ve been doing it for over twenty-five years now.  OUCH!

“Why?”, you ask, if its so bad, do I keep doing it?  Well, it pays the bills, it’s steady work and despite the B.S. and crap we constantly have to endure, I kind of like it.  I like interacting with people and I like being in the middle of things.  It’s never boring and each and every customer is an experience in itself.  Plus it’s one of those things that you know will never get better, but it’s not so bad it can’t be tolerated.  It’s a rut and I’m in it and for the time being, content about it.

I’ve been joking, ever since day 1 of working in these stores (Day 1 was with Jimmy Lee at the old Convenient Food Mart – loved that place!) that one day I was going to grow up and get a real job.  Well, that was in 1987 and twenty-six years later, I still haven’t gotten that “real job”.  Watch the movie “Clerks”.  I am Dante.  I am Randall.  I am Jay and Silent Bob. (Well, maybe not Jay… lol).  I’m a convenient store clerk.  That’s what I do.  And the beat goes on.

So that brings up to my “volunteer job”, which is to say that I help out at a local Food Bank.  I used to mainly work on the inside of the operation during distribution day, but as of late, my “PTB Job” work schedule, plus my dislike of mornings, has hampered that part of my role with the company.  Now I’m primarily the “Food Lion” guy which is to say that I’m the liason with the local grocery store and handle the pick-up and transportation for the food items that Food Lion donates to us each week.  Plus I still make the occasional appearance at the Food Bank on distribution days and handle the client listings / paperwork.  I need to get busy and make a new master-list too.  And I serve on the Board of Directors for the company too.  

Who would have ever thought that I, the same crazy-ass, homo-emo redneck clerk from the c-store would ever be involved in something of this nature, much less with such a major role in all of it.  But I am.  I was “volunteered” back over five years ago for one day after I just happened to decide to go the Food Bank with a friend.  They were short of help and the director needed a volunteer and picked my friend and me.  And I’ve been there ever since. I get tired and frustrated with this job sometimes, but I still enjoy it and that’s what matters.  And it’s giving back a little bit to the community at large and to people that need help and I can’t complain about that.  They (Hope In Christ Ministeries) do some great work and I’m just honored that they allow me to be a part of their group and help out as I can.  

My “Do It Because It Keeps Me Sane” job?  Well, that’s the whole writing thing.  I write short stories.  I write wrestling columns, or at least I did until Wrestle-Zone UK folded after almost 12 glorious years of being the UK’s #1 pro-wrestling and MMA site.  I need to find a new home for the columns and start writing again.  I just like to write and talk and ramble and go on and on and on and on.  It’s kind of odd because back in school, I hated english and I flunked the hell out of “creative writing”.  And look at me now.  

But the writing thing is what keeps me sane. It provides an outlet for my anger, my fears, my anxieties and all of that fun stuff.  If I didn’t write, I would surely end up being one of those crazy-ass serial killers we keep hearing about on the TV news.  Or else a weatherman.  That’s almost as bad.  I’ve never made any money off the writing thing (although I have gotten some free books, CD’s, t-shirts and tickets to local wrestling events… not too shabby) and I can’t really see doing this to pay the bills.  But it’s just as much a job as anything I do.  And I love doing it.

And finally, there’s my “dream / fantasy” jobs.  What do I want to do? Well, it all comes down to two main areas.  Pro wrestling and writing (big surprise, right?).  I want to find a way to make a living doing exactly what I’m doing now. Just sitting in front of this computer and letting the words flow from my head.  And I would also love to be involved somehow in the creative side of a small wrestling company.  I know I’ve got the knowledge, the mind, the talent for it.  I just have to have the chance to do it.  And eventually, I will either get that chance or else I’ll just go back to booking fantasy wrestling as I did a few years ago with my own (awesome) version of WCW.  I did it before and I can do it again… because I’m I’m the Maynard and I’m…. AWESOME!  (Miz is calling his lawyer right now!  Oops!)

I’m going to end this now because I just looked at the clock and it’s time to head out and get funky like a junkie monkey riding a donkey.  Hey K-Mak, I’m coming home brutha!  So that’s the end of this particular blog.  Comments welcome and appreciated.

It’s the end of “Day 1” – only 29 more to go…  How am I doing thus far?

Back tomorrow with “Day 2” of the “Thirty Days of Dougie”.  Thank you for reading and I’ll catch you on the flip side.  

Ubuntu!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.