Tossing Salt Presents:
Questions By Casper VII
August 22, 2021
DougMaynard.com

On Twitter, there is a man named Tyler Casper who likes to ask questions. And I like to answer them. And here we are. Let’s do this.

Did Cleopatra really kill herself with a cobra or was she murdered by the Romans?

I don’t know for sure. That was before my time. Read the autopsy reports say? It was probably Covid.

Have you ever burnt yourself while baking?

While I have burnt the top of my mouth by eating baked goods fresh from the oven on a few occasions, I don’t think I’ve ever actually burnt myself during the cooking process. I know how to use potholders.

What is the worst thing about shift work?

It throws the body all out of whack and you can’t get into any real sleep schedule or pattern.

What is the best thing about shift work?

It throws the body all out of whack and you can’t get into any real sleep schedule or pattern.

Do you take naps during the day?

Every chance I get – sleep is our friend.

What is your favorite spring activity?

Sleeping, chillaxing, and the occasional booty call.

What is your favorite winter activity?

Sleeping, chillaxing, cooking, and the occasional booty call.

What is your favorite Autumn activity?

See my previous answers for winter and spring. Add watching movies to that and there you go.

What is your favorite summer activity?

Summer is too damn hot for anything. I just want to sit in a cold room and sleep. Lots and lots of sleep.

At what temp do you say too cold outside?

I don’t do temperatures and numbers. If it’s uncomfortably cold for just a hoodie, it’s too damn cold.

At what temp do you say it’s too hot outside?

If this fat man is sweating, it’s too damn hot!

If you could only drink one thing for the rest of your life, what would it be?

Probably water. I love my Dew and my Bud Light, but I don’t think I would want them all the time. I like variety. But then again, both beverages are made with water in the ingredients, right? A loophole so I could still technically drink them. Works for me.

Do you trust your immune system?

My body is falling apart so damn fast, my doctor wears a hard hat. But where that dreaded test-shot for the China virus is concerned, I trust my immune system far more than I trust the Government.

Do you think Kamala Harris in the Oval Office will be better or worse than having Joe Biden?

She’s an absolute moron, but she can’t do any worse than the Pedo has for the past 8 months. But based on what I’ve seen of Heels Up thus far, I’ve no doubt that she’d probably take it as a challenge to be even worse than the brain-dead one currently in office. “Hold my beer while I destroy America”. Damn, we’re fucked.

What is your favorite drink?

At the moment my drink of choice is usually Mt. Dew Zero.

What is the worst thing to give a toddler for their birthday?

A machine gun or a bottle of good liquor. They won’t appreciate it.

What is the worst thing to give an adult for their birthday?

LincolnLogs – they won’t properly appreciate it.

Do you self-medicate?

I don’t do drugs, rarely drink, and don’t smoke anything, legal or otherwise. I just grit my teeth, put on a smirk, and deal. It’s not pretty or easy, but it works for me.

How many meals do you eat in a day?

Maybe one real meal if I’m lucky. Usually, it’s just grab something as needed and keep on keeping on.

What will Biden Fuck Up next?

Any and everything he can. If anything that is good for our country is pointed out to him, he’ll find a way to screw it up and screw us over in the process. That’s what he does.

Can you hear me? Now?

No, speak up.

What is the best historical quote from history?

“The nine most terrifying words in the English language are, I’m from the Government and I’m here to help!” – Ronald Reagan

If you only had enough money to buy food OR to buy a drink, which one would you choose?

Probably a drink. I like to drink.

The best answer to a stupid question?

“What?”

The stupidest question ever asked in an interview?

Hell if I know. I don’t watch Don Lemon give interviews.

Why are manhole covers round?

So they’ll fit the manholes, which are also round.

And there you go. My thanks to Mr. Casper for the questions and to you, my loyal readers (both of you) for reading. Go check out Casper on Twitter at @ghostly_host. Subscribe and add the man for questions, knowledge, and all sorts of cool stuff. Add me too at @Doug28352. Until the next time, take care and stay safe. I’ll be back and I’ll see you on the flip side.

Ubuntu!