Tossing Salt Presents:
A Day Of Dougie:
Hypocrisy, Black & Milds & Watermelon
January 27, 2022
DougMaynard.com

Hey kids. Do you know what time it is? Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? And how does he keep that pineapple from getting all soggy? Inquiring minds want to know. Yes, my friends, I woke up way too early and the first thing I did was watch some Sponge Bob Squarepants. No wonder my life is so freaking weird these days. So how are you?

It’s Thursday morning and it’s time to do another one of the infamous Days of Dougie blogs. This is where I pick three topics at random from the world-famous Magic Bag and then, with no prior knowledge or advance warning for preparation, just start writing. Sometimes it works out well and other times, not so much, but it’s always fun for all the kids and I like doing it so I do. I can’t do wrestling Q&A’s all the time, right? So I’ll get the bag and draw out some topics in just a moment, but before I do that, I want to get something off my chest.

It’s just a quick observation based on the news that broke last night about Supreme Court Justice Stephen Breyer and his impending retirement from the bench. If Breyer wants to retire, good for him. He’s in his eighties and knows when to call it a day, unlike Speaker Nancy Pelosi, age 81, who announced yesterday that she’s for reelection and doing it “for the children”. Does anyone believe that shit? But this isn’t about that crazy old bat. This is instead about a different crazy old bat, President Biden. And guess what it is in regards to Justice Breyer’s retirement.

Biden has promised that the next Justice, that he will appoint pending confirmation from Congress, will be a black woman, period. That’s all well and good except for it’s a violation of federal hiring laws and is also blatant racial and sexual discrimination. Allow me to explain.

Let’s say I have a billion-dollar business. I put an ad in the paper looking to hire a bookkeeper for my business, but then I specify that only straight white men will be considered for the job. Could I get away with that? Of course not. I would have every feminist group, every gay rights group, BLM, Al Sharpton, the NAACP, and the Biden Administration protesting, filing lawsuits, calling for boycotts, and probably setting fire to my business in the process. My name would be dragged through the mud and everyone and their mama would be upset. Any government contracts would be canceled and I would essentially be ruined forever, as it should be.

But this opening is coming up and Biden’s first statements are that only black women need to apply for the job. No one else will be considered. So if you’re male, white, Asian, Native American, or any other race or gender besides a black female, regardless of your qualifications, don’t even bother applying. Biden was forced to make a promise in exchange for political support and even though he’s breaking the law, exposing his own hypocrisy, and in essence, committing quid pro quo by giving special consideration to a group over other groups in exchange for political favors, no one is raising an eyebrow in Washington or saying a word. It’s just politics and laws, discrimination, and basic morals are damned. That’s your President. What a total and absolute piece of shit!

And now that I’ve gotten that off my chest, let’s find two more topics for the Day of Dougie stuff. I know that I usually do three, but that little bit of pointing out the hypocrisy of the left and their Pedo President took up more space than I intended, so I’ll count that as a topic and find two more to wrap this booger up. So, where is my bag at? I’m going in and we have Black & Milds and watermelon. Okay then, let’s do this.

Black & Milds

A small cigar with a filter and pipe tobacco, an alternative to cigarettes, and one of the few tobacco products that I don’t find disgusting or repulsive. Hell, I actually like the smell of a black & mild cigar. And they remind me of two people. One was a man named Donald that used to come into the Dairy Mart back in the day and hang around. He was there to score with one of my coworkers, but hell, he could have scored with me anytime. And the other was a man that I worked with at Nic’s Pic Kwik in McColl, SC many years ago. Hell, this was back in 1987, I believe. And he chain-smoked the black & milds like most people do cigarettes. You could literally smell him coming, but I liked the pipe tobacco smell and he was a cool old dude. Jim Smith was his name. And every time that I smell that smell, I think of these two guys. Good memories of a better time. Let’s move on.

Watermelon

I’m not a big fan of watermelon. It’s okay sometimes if the mood is right, but the seeds get on my nerves and it’s just too damn messy for my tastes. But I do remember back when I was a kid, all of my friends and I gathered in the back yard and my Mom would come outside with a watermelon. She’d slice it up and we’d all be a bunch of happy young-uns. And being the bratty kids that we were, we’d all spit seeds at each other. Yeah, back then, I spit instead of swallowing. My, how times have changed. But I was always told to never swallow the watermelon seeds because allegedly, they would grow in your stomach and make you have babies. My older brother told me that. I think he was lying, but then again, maybe that is where babies come from? Hmmm! I was like six years old. Don’t judge me. A piece of watermelon right now would actually be good. I guess I’m in the mood. I’ll go eat an apple instead. Oy vey!

And there you go. My thanks for reading. Comments, thoughts, and any questions you may have, leave me a reply or give me a shout at my e-mail of Doug28352@yahoo.com. Until the next time, take care of yourself and stay safe. I’ll see you at the Chinese buffet. I want an eggroll. Take care.

Ubuntu!