Tossing Salt Presents:
A Day Of Dougie
Transgender Folks, Vidiots & Please Carry Me Home
March 11, 2022
DougMaynard.com

Man, it’s been a weird day. I actually slept far longer than I usually do or expected to and I guess, when I’ve been averaging three hours of sleep a day, a little extra sleep is a good thing. And if it had been a nice peaceful sleep, it may have been, but instead, it was tossing and turning, dreams of more medical issues, conversations with people I haven’t thought of or spoken to in decades, and I think I attended my own funeral. Yeah, a real pisser if you will.

The medical issues, I understand. The old friends, I understand since I’ve been doing a lot of looking up old acquaintances on Facebook lately, feeling a big nostalgia for a better, simpler time. And I even get the funeral thing since death has featured so prominently in my life as of late, with Matt passing away in November, then Pa and Josh in the past week, plus the presence of my oldest brother, who passed away last year, still looms large in this house.

So yeah, I get it. It’s been a messed up year and I’ve got a messed up head right now. But it’s still disturbing and just screwing with me today. I think I need a good shrink. Well, either that or a night or two of alcoholic debauchery with some good friends. As Freddie Mercury said in one of his songs, “I’m coming down with a fever. I’m really out to sea. This kettle is boiling over. I think I’m a banana tree.” Yeah, it finally happened. I’m slightly mad! Damn, I need to go wash clothes.

And I’m back. I put some clothes in the washing machine. And reading back over what I’ve written so far, I think I need to change subjects and get on with whatever the Magic Bag has to offer today. So let’s wrap up the previous few paragraphs. I don’t sleep. I have weird dreams. I need a shrink. I’d prefer a bonfire, some beer, and one or two friends. And this world right now is killing my vibe. If I didn’t have my bro, the family, an outlet to release and create, my cat, and great hair, I’d be an absolute mess. And there you have it. I’m so glad that nobody reads this shit. Change that. The wrestling stuff tends to get good numbers. The more personal stuff, not so much. This is more for me, as a release for all of the stuff inside. Hell, it’s better than homicide, right? Let’s get to the Magic Bag and the Day of Dougie stuff.

We’ve got the Bag in hand and we need some topics of discussion. We reach inside and have Transgender Folks, Vidiots, and Please Carry Me Home. Well, this won’t take too long. Are you ready? Let’s do this.

Transgender Folks…

This is the one where I’ll probably piss some people off, but that’s okay. You’ll get over it. The exact definition of transgender is as follows.

Transgender is an umbrella term for persons whose gender identity, gender expression, or behavior does not conform to that typically associated with the sex to which they were assigned at birth.

In other words, they’re fucked in the head, brainwashed by the years of conditioning, and believe that they’re someone that they’re not. I get that we all have different personalities, different characters, different outlooks on life, and different perspectives, but let’s break it down to the most common factor. If you are born with a penis, you’re a male. If you have a vagina, you’re a female. And yes, it is that simple. Just because you feel like a woman doesn’t make you a woman.

Hell, I feel like a sad panda sometimes, but I’m not a panda. I’m a human. I’m gay and attracted to men, but that doesn’t make me a woman either. It just means that I’m a guy who likes guys. Putting on a dress, changing your name, and playing make-believe don’t change who you are and who God made you. It’d be nice if things were that easy but face reality. It’s not. You can lie to yourself and pretend all you want, but that doesn’t make it real. Reality can be an absolute bitch sometimes, but it’s still a reality and unless you’re an absolute idiot or mentally ill, you’ll have to face it and deal with it at some point.

I’ll finish this up by saying that I may sound mean, but I could honestly care less how a person lives their life. If you’re more comfortable living a dream or fantasy, then so be it. Be happy. But don’t try to force your fantasy beliefs on me or anyone else. Transgender is a mythical way of life. It’s not real. You’re physically either a man or a woman. Accept it or not, it’s just how it is. Let’s move on.

Vidiots…

When I see this word, I think of YouTube and TikTok where people literally make videos of themselves being absolutely stupid and looking like morons. The name Super Humman immediately comes to mind. So do a few others, but he stands out the most like a total and absolute vidiot in every sense of the word. I’ll suffice this to say that being a Vidiot, making videos where you physically harm yourself and embarrass everyone who ever thought highly of you and stood by you, it’s not a good thing. Don’t do that!

And here’s a video of Daniel Tosh, giving the infamous Super Humman a Web Redemption. Someone needs to tell this guy to stop. Just stop now! Enjoy!

Please Carry Me Home

And finally, we come to this one and it’s a song, written by Jessi Colter and her son, Shooter Jennings, for the soundtrack of the movie, The Last Temptation Of Christ. It’s a great song and very moving. I want this played at my funeral. Hell, I just want to play it now. Enjoy and thank you.

And there you go. My thanks for reading. Comments, thoughts, and any questions are welcome and appreciated. Until the next time, take care and be safe. I’ll see you next time.

Ubuntu!