Tossing Salt Presents:
Questions By Kelly
Wishes, Music, Traditions & More
March 13, 2022
DougMaynard.com

A lovely person named Kelly (@kelly_ques) asks questions on Twitter. I answer them here. It’s a dirty job, but someone has to do it. It’s Questions By Kelly. Let’s go.

What item is worth spending more money on?

If you’re going to drink Soda, get the good stuff (Pepsi, Coke, etc) rather than the cheap stuff (Bubba Soda, Chek, Sam’s Choice). You’ll be glad you did. And the same goes for vodka. Cheap vodka has its place, but drink a fifth of Tito’s compared to drinking a fifth of Nikolai. See if you can tell the difference. You will. Cheap is effective, but you pay for it later, in spades.

A genie grants you the ability to have infinite amounts of one item. What is it?

Cash. The rest of the stuff can be handled in the paperwork afterward. Show me the money, you genie bitch!

What is your favorite type of music?

It varies from day to day and moment to moment. I listen to anything and everything from jazz to classic country to metal to rock to the blues. Hardcore rap is not my thing, but anything else, so long as it has a beat, a good voice, a good story or message, or touches my heart or soul, is allowed and enjoyed. Right now, I’m listening to Ray Charles. Before this, it was Alice Cooper, Struggle Jennings, Cat Stevens, and Hank Jr. Go figure.

What is the silliest thing you can imagine?

People actually saying that Joe Biden has been doing a good job as President, that the Democrats truly want what’s best for America, and that Hillary Clinton can be trusted. And yes, I’ve heard people claim all thee of these things. It both amazes me and makes me sad.

What is your favorite word in another language?

Ookina Mune. It’s the Japanese translation for “big chest”. A young woman I knew back in the St. Andrews days told us this to help describe some of her dorm mates who had big boobs.

What is your favorite movie genre?

I like a bit of everything, but generally, stupid comedy, low (no) budget horror flicks and musicals are my top picks.

When was (or how old were you) the first time you tasted real butter?

Fresh from the womb. My grandparents had a real farm and real cows. Homemade butter was part of the daily diet.

Does your family practice any unusual traditions?

Well, Mom is in a love/hate relationship with a cult, my oldest sister stays drunk most of the time, my other sister is addicted to shopping and watching some messed up stuff on television, and I spend 98% of my time writing about pro wrestling and fiction stories about vampires and superheroes (at FanFic.net under the name TSFiction19). Nope, nothing unusual here.

What is something or someone that was previously ridiculed, but now is generally more accepted or even seen as cool?

Guys wearing dresses. Hell, I’m gay, but always thought this was kind of odd and deranged. Now we have guys in dresses, girls dressed like thugs with the pants sagging, and everything in-between. I get it. Do what floats your boat and makes you happy, but it’s still different, odd, and not quite right. It’s more accepted now than it once was, but that doesn’t make it cool or right, regardless of what you might think.

And there you go. My thanks to Kelly for the great questions, and to you, my loyal readers, both of you, for reading. Comments, thoughts, and any questions are welcome and appreciated. Until the next time, take care and be safe. I’ll see you on the other side.

Ubuntu!