A Day of Dougie: New Fat Guy, Library & Harpo Marx

Tossing Salt Presents:
A Day of Dougie
New Fat Guy, Library & Harpo Marx
December 9, 2022

Are you ready to do it again? I have the Magic Bag in hand and it’s time to get random, pick three items of discussion from the bag, and then with no advance warning, preparation, or time to get jiggy with it, just write. It’s a great writing tool to stimulate creativity, spark the imagination, and get some insight into what makes this mind tick and keeps the gerbil in the wheel running. Or maybe it’s just writing as something to do to pass the time? Who really knows for sure? It’s a Day of Dougie and it all starts now.

So what are the topics? Let’s reach into the bag and find out. Can we get a drum roll, please? And the topics are New Fat Guy, Library, and Harpo Marx. Let’s do this.

New Fat Guy

Why is this in the bag? What am I supposed to write about a new fat guy as opposed to an older fat guy or the fat guy that isn’t really old, but has been part of the unit for a while? I don’t get this one at all unless it’s referring to when a group of friends loses the token fat guy of their group, and every group of friends has one, due to a heart attack or choking on a meatball sub or being mistaken for Moby Dick by Captain Ahab. Long story short, they have a fat friend, and the fat friend is gone. So what is a group to do? Find themselves a new fat guy to fill the void (and take home all the leftovers from dinner). Hey, I can say this. I am the old fat guy, or at least I used to be. I’m still fat, but I’m also the token gay guy, the token cripple, and the voice of sarcastic reason when things are getting crazy. Damn, so many roles to fill and I do them all so well. But what was I saying? I guess when my circle of friends, both of them, get tired of my antics, I’ll be replaced. There will be a new fat guy in the group. And there you go. See, I made it work as a topic of discussion. Yeah, let’s go with that. Let’s move on.


It’s a building that has a lot of books, but that’s not important right now. I used to love going to the library. I would say that I still do, but I haven’t been to the one here in Laurinburg in at least fifteen years. I still have my library card, though it expired in 2004. I wonder if I should get it renewed. It was my sanctuary from people and reality. Why deal with the real world when you can escape into the world of a great book? I still like to escape the real world, but only now I used Facebook and Twitter. Anyhow, libraries are cool. ‘Nuff said!

Harpo Marx

One of the famous Marx Brothers. Harpo was the blonde with crazy hair who didn’t talk, but was extremely woman crazy and played the harp, hence the name Harpo. I remember him in a few of the Marx Brothers movies, especially Animal Crackers, but don’t know too much about him. Groucho was the one who hosted the game show, shot off the one-liners, hung out with Alice Cooper, and always wanted to know if you’d like to buy a duck. But if Groucho was the star of the family, Harpo was a very close second. The Marx Brothers were kind of before my time, but he’ll always stand out in my eyes. Just a cool dude.

And there you go. I made it work with three very different and random topics. What fun. Thanks for sticking around and reading. I guess it’s time to close this baby up and go do some other stuff for a little while. Just a reminder. Starting on Tuesday, December 13th, and running through Christmas Eve, December 24th will be the 12 Days of Dougie Christmas. Watch for it. and now that you know, I’m out of here. Take care and be well. Thanks for making today a Day of Dougie. I’ll see you on the next ride.


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