Tossing Salt Presents:
Questions (Not) By Casper #6
Random Twitter Q&A
March 7, 2023
DougMaynard.com

In a world full of questions, it’s always fun to reply with an answer or two. I used to do a regular piece called “Questions By Casper”, but alas, Casper has gone MIA. But others have stepped up to fill the void. Just random questions from my Twitter timeline. Are you ready? Let’s go.

Do you believe South Park is overrated?

I think that South Park has seen it’s better days, but much like Saturday Night Live on NBC, it still has moments of total insanity and chaos that will leave you going, “What the… ?”. It’s not perfect, but it’s still worth a see every so often.

What’s something abusive or crazy you had a teacher do to you in school?

Well, I guess I probably shouldn’t talk about that Phys. Ed teacher in middle school because that would be considered illegal and totally fucked up and believe me, it was. So let’s go with a substitute teacher I had in seventh grade. We (a friend and I) disrupted her class and she was ballistic (insane). We had to stand in the corner of the room and with our arms held straight out, hold books. After a few moments, the arms will start shaking and hurting. It was physical abuse that served no purpose than to be literal torture. It worked though, I guess. We didn’t disrupt her class (much) after that. Also, she was reported to the principal and wasn’t used much as a sub for that school after that. I don’t know who reported her, but thank you.

Will you ever drive an electric car?

I can barely remember to plug my phone in and keep it charged, so I can imagine how I’d do with an electric car. I’d get halfway down the block and the car would die on me and I’d be stranded. So no electric cars for me. I’ll stick with my gas-powered vehicle and destroy the atmosphere as God intended. By the way, global warming is a myth.

What is the greatest Ice Cream of all time?

For me personally, it’s either Orange Sherbert or Neapolitan. Three flavors for the price of one? Works for me every time.

What “old” movie should every young person watch in their lifetime?

I would say Blazing Saddles to realize the stupidity of racism, East of Eden to understand why James Dean is/was such an icon and so loved, and the Rocky Horror Picture Show, just because it’s awesome and you haven’t lived until you’ve done the Time Warp.

Who is your favorite AEW wrestler?

How did a wrestling question get in here? sighs Let’s go with either Christian or Cesaro. They aren’t totally covered by the AEW stink as of yet and are two great talents who can go with the best of them. Also, CM Punk just because saying his name will piss some people off.

Do you believe in “love at first sight?”

It’s generally just lust, but yeah, love does manage to get in there sometimes and show itself. It’s rare, but it does exist.

If money were no object, what would you be doing right now?

Most likely, the same thing I’m doing right now, but with a better computer, a private office, and a personal assistant at my side to laugh at my comments and go, “That’s a great one, boss!”.

Without Googling, Who is the greatest “fictional Coach” you can think of?

Let’s go with Jonathan Coachman, formerly of WWE and now with ESPN. I know he’s not fictional, but I honestly can’t think of anyone else right off the top of my head.

Do you believe The Shawshank Redemption was overrated?

It’s a good movie and I can see why people like it. It’s not quite in the league of Cannonball Run or Clerks III in my opinion, but it’s decent and I won’t slam it or anything.

Which retired NFL player would you want to see play in today’s game in his prime?

OJ Simpson. Just to watch him slice through the other team and hack his way to the infield, would be awesome!

What is Your Favorite Mel Brooks Movie?

I’m a big fan of Spaceballs, the History of the World movies, and Young Frankenstein, but of all this comedic legends movies, the one I go back and watch the most often has to be Blazing Saddles.

What do you think the real reason for Covid lockdowns was?

It’s all about control, power, and a test run by the dark forces that really run this world to see just how easy it truly is to control and manipulate humanity. And they did.

What’s your favorite Joaquin Phoenix film?

The only things I really know this man from are either Walk The Line or The Joker. I was/am more of a fan of his late brother River Phoenix, who absolutely stole the show in the movie, My Own Private Idaho than I am of Joaquin. But of these two movies I’ve mentioned, my favorite would be Walk The Line.

In your opinion, who’s currently an unsigned Pro Wrestler that needs to be signed to TV?

Another wrestling question? Damn, where is my quality control? This is supposed to be the non-wrestling part of the website. But to answer that question, three men I watched wrestle a few days ago, live at the St. Andrews Knights Honor event here in Laurinburg, NC, come to mind. A young man named Garrett Sinclair, Mr. Sammy Love, and the New Age Villain, Nathan Cross. I can see roles for each of these men in a WWE or AEW system within the next few years. They’ve got skills.

And there you go. My thanks for reading. Comments, thoughts, and any questions you may have are welcome and appreciated. And with that being said, it’s time to put this baby to bed. I think I’m going to the college to people watch/duck watch. Take care and be well, my friends. I’ll see you at the bar.

Ubuntu!