New Year – New Me: Resolutions For 2018

New Year – New Me:
Resolutions For 2018
January 1, 2018
DougMaynard.com

Good morning and welcome to 2018, a brand new year and a brand new beginning, not only for DougMaynard.com, my site, but for the man himself, aka “Me!”. Don’t you hate that, how people always start off the new year with all sorts of promises and proclamations about this and that and how since the last number for the date has changed, all of a sudden it’s a new start and they’re a different person and blah, blah, blah! I hate it too. Well, hate is a strong word, but it does get kind of annoying. I would never, never, ever do that.

Or would I?

Since I have a little time to kill before I head out to do my volunteer stuff, I realized that this would be a great time to see how hypocritical I can be and make a few New Year resolutions. It’s the start of a new life, a new beginning, etc. Hell, it’s just stuff that I know I need to change and be better with, but for whatever reason, mainly my procrastination, mixed with my anxieties and fear of all things new and different, keep me from doing. Maybe a little laziness too, but I’m not admitting to that part of it. I don’t have time to be lazy. I need a freakin’ nap.

So with all of that in mind, what I think I’m going to do here is list a few changes that I’d like to make in my life and maybe, just maybe (naughty girls need love too!) – Sorry, I just had a Samantha Fox flashback moment. I had her poster on my bedroom wall. I’m gay. That tells you just how hot she was back in the day. Not quite George Michael, during his WHAM! days, but still, she was a looker. Now, what was I saying?

Oh yeah, I’m going to list a few resolutions for the new year, the year of our God, 2018. Some are serious. Some are not. Some, I shall strive and work hard to achieve and accomplish. Some, I shall blow off, something I’ve been told I’m quite accomplished at, and within the next forty-eight hours, they shall be naught but a faded memory. That sounds really bad, doesn’t it? I’m going to keep all of these and accomplish each and every one of these in the following year. I am determined. I am proud. I am woman – hear me roar! Hmmmm… forget about that last one. I’m all man and proud of it. Ask your ex-boyfriend. He knows.

And to put some controls in place and to keep this from being all over the place (too late), I’m going with a tried and true established format. We’re talking “Shades of David Letterman” Top Ten style. Yes, a “Top Ten List!”. And you probably thought I was going to go with doing the Dougie, didn’t you? Nah, despite the name, I’m far more of an “Electric Slide” type of guy. Let’s do this and to really make it true and original…

From the home office in New Haven, CT…

Top Ten Dougie Resolutions For 2018…

10. Finish the stories I have started writing and are sitting alone and neglected on my computer. The Avengers, Dr. Druid, The characters from Dark Shadows, the covert group known as the new “Freedom Force”, Cloak and Dagger and so many more, will be highly appreciative. They want their stories told and I need to finish up and do it.

9. Lose weight. This is one that everyone has and I’m not an exception. I’m not too bad right now, running about 230, but I need to get rid of this belly. Hell, a few years ago, I was up to 338 lbs and thanks to the miracle of diabetes, I lost most of that. I’m not quite an elder version of Taylor Lautner yet (yum), but I’m trying. I want to lose and I’ll work on that, but so long as I don’t gain, I won’t complain either.

8. Find someone to love. Sex is easy, especially with stuff like Meet Me and other social media, but I don’t care about sex. I want someone to trust, respect, be with, hold, talk to and to fill the emptiness and major void that is in my heart. I hate being alone, but that doesn’t mean I’m going to settle. I’ve done enough of that over the years and when I look back, oh vey! I’ve met some amazing people and have some great stories I could tell, but that’s not what I need or want. I’m too old for that kind of crap. Somewhere out there, be it man or woman (but preferably man), my soul mate is waiting. And this year, I’m going to find him.

7. Clean my room. It’s not dirty per say, but a little “lived in” and messy, yes, it is. I have books everywhere and other items I’ve picked up over the years and well, my pack-rat nature is taking up a lot of space. I need to just go in there, box up the books and donate them to Habitat, put my old notebooks and magazines in the attic (or the spare bedroom) and turn my room into a bedroom again. I also need to clean out my desk, but I think that just setting it on fire might work better.

6. Get out of the house & socialize. If it was up to me, I probably would never leave the house at all, except to work and maybe go grocery shopping when the food supplies get low. It’s not that I don’t like people, but my anxieties get all worked up at the very idea of having to talk to people, make conversation, be sociable, etc. Now I understand why I used to drink so much. It was my crutch and made interaction with others easier and enjoyable. Now I just go in there, exposed and raw, for everyone to see and it’s scary. Some people can do it. I get anxious going to get the mail or trying to order a pizza over the phone. But I used to have friends. I used to be very sociable and part of the group. I was always doing something and was on the go. I was happy. I need to be happy again and staying here in the house, hiding from the world isn’t going to do it. I need to get out more and just be me. And I will.

5. Write the “Tossing Salt – Worldwide News” column again. I can’t remember the last time I wrote a full column. It’s been a while. I’ve gotten spoiled by doing the site here, with either shorter wrestling pieces, aka the “Fact or Fiction” or the “Q&A’s”, but I haven’t been focused on a long, real and insightful wrestling column in quite a while. You should always dance the the one who brought you to the dance and for me, it was pro wrestling and “Tossing Salt”. I’ve been neglectful and distracted. I need to change that.

4. Take better care of myself. Now that I finally have insurance, I’ve already taken the first steps with regular Doctor appointments and treatment for my diabetes, as well as medication for my cholesterol and blood pressure. The next steps are getting my eyes fixed and the dentist. I plan on being around for a long, long time to come and I need to be in peak condition if I’m going to be here, right? So I’m working on that.

3. Start returning phone calls and text messages promptly. I am the world’s worst about this and it’s not because I don’t want to talk to anyone because I actually do, but the thought of speaking on the phone, even to someone that I love and respect and enjoy talking to, just puts my nerves into a frenzy. Once we start talking, I’m okay, but the build plays havoc with my mind. And then, if I’ve delayed a call or returning a message already, there is that anxiety that adds on to the original anxiety and the delay and procrastination just gets longer and stronger. I’m better than this though and the people who reach out to me deserve better than this.

2. Go to a concert / live wrestling show. I started thinking about it and I love live music. I love live wrestling events. And it’s been far too long since I’ve attended or been to either. That will change this year. Even if it’s just a local Indy wrestling show (Hey Kipper… that’s a hint, my friend) or someone singing over at St. Andrews University… or even the Elvis impersonater that performs each week at Captain Larry’s… it doesn’t matter. I need to start getting out again and events like these will be a great way to start.

1. Be happy. Whatever it takes, whatever I have to do, I am tired of being sad and depressed and all funky like a monkey. I’m Dougie and this is my world. It’s going to be a good and happy place for me, my brother, my friends and whoever else wants to tag along for the ride. I used to be “the Man!”. I will be “the Man” again. And 2018, it’s a great time to start. ‘Nuff said!

And there you go. My resolutions for the upcoming 525, 600 minutes of my life. I might not accomplish them all, but at least I’m going to give it a try. And what more can one ask for, right?

And with that, I’m closing this up and putting baby to bed. Time to head out and do that “Food Lion” thing I do each Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday. Thank you for reading. Thoughts, comments and any suggestions about ways to make this life a better one are welcome and appreciated. And I will reply. Until the next time, stay warm and safe. I’ll catch you later. Happy New Year!

Ubuntu!

@00 @ a jay & silent bob

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