Tossing Salt Presents:
Music Fact or Fiction
McCartney, Ne-Yo, Rap and More
June 17, 2018
It’s a lovely Sunday morning and I’m sitting here waiting for my sister to give me a call. I’m such a nice and loyal, wonderful brother and I promised (she volunteered me) to go with her to the grocery store. I’d rather just be here and doing that writing thing that I enjoy doing every Sunday, playing catch-up. But no, that would be too good and Lord help us all if I was to actually have a day to myself. That will never, ever happen. But I’ll quit whining and crying. I’m not a liberal Democrat from Congress after all. It’s time instead to do that Fact or Fiction thing and this is the the (la la la) music edition. Why bitch about my life when I can talk crap about prominent Divas with no talent, but big boobs who think they’re larger than life and have a Shitzu named Ernie. But it looks as if there are no questions about Mariah Carey. Oh well, we’ll make do. The questions and statements come from my friends over at 411mania.com/music. And I’ve got the opinions and thoughts that follow. And I also have lots and lots of canned cheese. It’s a long story. Let’s do this.
1. You’re interested in a Paul McCartney edition of Carpool Karaoke.
FACT: It’s Paul McCartney so of course I’m interested. The whole “Carpool Karaoke” deal is somewhat lame and kind of stupid, but we’ve all rode around with our friends, usually while extremely intoxicated or high (and with a designated and sober driver so don’t complain to me or get all serious. DWI is bad! I know that.) Our singing was pretty funny though and those times, with some good friends (Rabbit) were and are some of the best memories of my life. So two guys (and a camera crew) ride around and cut the fool and sing a few tunes and they record it and all of that. It’s an interesting concept for a show and depending on the talent, it’s a hot or miss and this one, it’s Paul McCartney. He’s a Beatle. He’s “the Beatle” who’s still alive and had all the talent and cuteness. It’ll be fun to see and watch. So am I interested? Damn skippy.
2. Weezer’s “Africa” cover was great.
FICTION: The song is okay, but it’s nothing special and just kind of bleh at best. Weezer took a song by Toto and did it as a song by Toto, not a song by Weezer. He didn’t make it his own or add anything to it and it’s just another cover, pleasant enough, but neither good nor bad. It just is…
3. The Rick and Morty song for Kanye West was hilarious.
FACT: I’m not really a big RIck and Morty fan myself, but my brother and nephew are big fans and because of them, I’ve watched more episodes than I care to admit to so I get their special kind of humor and relative insanity. I personally prefer Family Guy or even South Park, but they didn’t do the song for Kayne, a walking parody in himself and Rick and Morty did and they did a good job. It’s funny and good enough and even had the Kardashian seal of approval (or maybe it’s just the approval of a seal), but it all came out well and is decent enough.
4. The upcoming Bob Marley biopic is intriguing.
FACT: It’s much like the question with Paul McCartney earlier that it’s Bob Marley. Of course it’s intriguing. It’s got the approval of his son, Ziggy Marley and anything that has anything to do with Ziggy will be interesting. And add in the pop culture references, the reggae stories and all of the smoking pot stories, it really should be a fun movie. I expect it’ll be well worth watching.
5. You’re not a fan of Ne-Yo’s new album Good Man.
FACT: Who? I’ve heard of Ne-Yo, but I’d much rather have a Yo-Yo or maybe a NeKot (love those cookies) or even a Yoo-Hoo. The man has some okay R&B stuff, I suppose, but who really listens to R&B as new material these days? If it didn’t come from the 60’s or 70’s, it’s not real R&B and doesn’t matter anyhow. What the hell is a Ne-Yo anyhow? Wasn’t he one of the characters in Star Wars? I would say Planet of the Apes, but then I’d be kicked off my blog and fired by ABC for making an honest observation. It does sound like one of Tarzan’s monkey’s though. “Hey boy, this is Cheetah’s new baby. His name is Ne-Yo.” I guess I’d better quit before someone decides I’m a racist. No, I’m not a racist. I’m being funny (and kind of an ass). There’s a difference. Go suck on an exhaust pipe, just like your Mom. If I want some good R&B music, I’ll listen to James Brown (who shares the same wig style as Maxine Waters) or a true legend like Betty Wright. Ne-Yo? Nah, I don’t think so.
6. You agree with Nicki Minaj that rap music in 2018 is too tame.
FACT: By too tame, do you mean that only every third word is “bitch” or “nigga” or some other sexist or racist slam that makes the rapper look like they have a single digit IQ. Then absolutely and positively YES. Rap, when it first started out, was fun and entertaining and creative. Then it became harder and more thuggy and gangsta, but there was some appeal by a few talented folks as it was more reality based and just honest, raw emotion. Look at Dre, Tupac or early Eminem for examples. And now, it just sucks. It’s always been crap for the most part in my opinion (and in the opinion of the West Texas Rednecks – RIP), but there was some good and some fresh originality to be found among the large pile of manure, like a diamond ring buried in mound of compost. Okay, not a good analogy, but they can’t all work or be funny. Rap now is generally boring and sucks. It’s just that simple. And it’s people like Minaj who are to blame. They quit being real and became “stars” and “artists” and everything that was original or good about their early work has been forgotten and replaced by “politically correct” or “hate Trump” or just lame ass, going through the motions material instead. Sad, but true and it’s only going to get worse before it gets any better. Mark my words.
And there you go. I think it’s time to wrap this mother up and go give my sister a call. It’s been almost two hours since I originally texted her and nothing back yet. If we’re going to the store, we need to go. It’s getting hot out there and I’ve got things to do (not really). So with this, I’m through for the day. Thoughts, comments and anything else (jokes, questions, a date) welcome. I loves ya, my Peeps. Take care and I’ll catch you later.