5 Questions: Comedians, Marriage, The Holidays & More…

5 Questions
Comedians, Marriage, The Holidays & More
January 5, 2019
DougMaynard.com

Trying to get started for the day and what better way than to tackle a few of the questions sitting and waiting in my mailbox? One of the best (and worst) things about social media and Facebook in particular is that people have no respect of privacy or respect to personal space. They will ask anything and everything and me, being me, I’ll usually do my best to answer. That’s what I do here, five (sometimes more) questions at a time. These come from my Facebook timeline. Let’s do this.

Who are your three favorite comedians?

That’s hard to say because I enjoy most comics, if they’re actually funny and smart and insightful and for different reasons. Of course, that rules out Kevin Hart and Kathy Griffin because they’re never funny, never smart and have nothing worth hearing to say. Also, most of the “late night hosts” are out as well for the same reasons. I guess I’ll just go in terms of pure stand-up and who I enjoy listening to the most and find the most original, enlightening and entertaining. That would be Bill Cosby (one of the greatest story tellers of all time), George Carlin (one of the smartest comics ever) and Joan Rivers. No reason needed for her. It’s freakin’ Joan Rivers and that’s a ‘Nuff said!. Honorable mention goes to Chris Rock, Richard Pryor and Beth Donahue. Beth only did one tape that I know of called “Sweet Meat”, but she’s an awesome woman and hilarious. Kudos to Jay Hickman as well. He was ahead of his time and lived to make people laugh. RIP Jay, Joan, George and Cosby’s career due to overmedication and Jello Pudding Pops.

Would you rather be able to live and travel under the sea or live and travel in space?

That’s a tough call because would I rather be Aquaman or Superman? Either would be exciting, fascinating and totally awesome. Space is amazing and beautiful and infinite, but I think I’d get lonely and tired of it after a while. I think the magic that is the ocean and the 2/3 of the earth that it covers would call to me more and that’s the path I’d choose.

Would you marry for money?

It’s probably the only way and reason I’ll ever get married. Cupid and the whole “in love” things seems to have totally passed me by and every time I fall hard for someone or decide to trust someone, I get totally fucked (and not in the good way). I don’t trust people easily anymore and at my age now, it would be too big an adjustment and change to make to join another in matrimony. However, if the money is good, they need a green card or something and it’s just a pay me, take the name and leave deal, I can totally work with that, especially if he’s cute.

What was most memorable for you about Christmas this year?

This past Christmas was mainly about family and that special little man that is my brother’s mini-me. He kicked my ass in pool and seemed to have a good Christmas. Aside from that, I cooked, people ate and it was just another year in the books. Santa seemed to have forgotten about me this year and with the exception of a couple of things I got for myself, it was a quiet year which suited me fine. I cooked, the family ate well and I guess that covers it well enough.

Any resolutions for the upcoming year, 2019?

The basics. Keep up the site and make it bigger and better than ever. Lose weight and get healthy. Find a good, decent man to call my own and keep on keeping on. Put Dougie first for a change and quit allowing myself to be used and taken for granted. And of course, get rich so I can live comfortably the rest of my days while cutting back on the 9 to 5 work activities, spending more time on the volunteer duties and devoting more time to the site making it bigger and better than ever.

And with that, I’m out of here. Time to go get a haircut and some Mt. Dews. My thanks for reading. Comments, thoughts and any questions you’d like answered are welcome and appreciated. Until the next time, take care and have a great one. See you later.

Ubuntu!

@00 1 1 10 a a afive

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