Questions By Casper #47

Tossing Salt Presents:
Questions By Casper #47
October 4, 2020
DougMaynard.com

Over in the world of Twitter, I found a man that likes to ask questions. And I do mean a lot of them. His name is Tyler “The Ghost” Casper and he’s at @tyler_casper. A good guy that you should go check out. Now, as I was saying, he likes to ask questions. I like to answer them and it provides content for the site. So here we are. Every few days, I go down his feed and copy the inquiries he’s asked. And then it’s here for the answers. It’s insightful, thought-provoking, and hopefully entertaining for you, the reader, as well. So let’s can the chit chat and let’s do this. Are you ready? And away we go…

Do you keep an eye on your weight?

As big as that belly gets sometimes, it’s hard not to keep an eye on it. Yeah, I’m fat.

What is the first thing you would do if you were ruler of the world for a day?

Throw one hell of a party, Just kidding. I’d sit with my top aides and compose a list of priorities and what needs to be addressed immediately. As for my first executive order, shirts would not be required in my presence, nor pants if the person is a cute guy.

So who thinks liberals will have tests to cry after this election? They don’t have an endless supply, do they?

I don’t get the question but have no fear. After the election and the President is once again elected for four more years, there will be plenty of crying and screaming and hissy fits for all left-leaning morons and babies.

What is your favorite Freezy Pop flavor?

I like the green and orange ones.

What is a religion without faith?

It’s not what you believe, but just that you believe.

Some speculated that Joe Biden may be using drugs to appear vibrant during the presidential debates. What say you?

Joe Biden is a sad human being who is in the process of drifting away from reality. He’s not competent or all there, but he’s kept on a leash by the powers that be on the left to get the control of the White House, most likely under the auspices of Kamala and her white-masters, Pelosi & Schumer. Are they drugging him up? Probably. Nothing would surprise me.

Do you take a “God First” approach to life?

I’d be better off if I did, but I generally take more of an “Oh shit!” approach instead.

Do you place the needs of others ahead of your own?

Far more often than I should.

What is the craziest thing you’ve ever heard?

Would Yoko Ono singing count? I have heard much and seen much. I think listening to the weekly Jim Cornette rants might qualify.

What is the worst name for a men’s clothing store?

“Put This Shit On So The Wife Won’t Get’s Mad”, or “Clothes For Idiots”.

What is the craziest thing you’ve ever read?

My journals and notebooks from my teenage years and early twenties. I was a messed-up kid. But luckily, I’m doing much better now.

What is the worst name for a woman’s clothing store?

“Clothes For Cunts”.

What’s the biggest fish you’ve ever caught?

It was a big one, probably five or six inches long. No, that was my ex-boyfriend, Danny. I don’t know. I always ended up with the small ones. Oh wait, that was my choice of men as well.

Do you belong to a gym?

No, I do not, but we have a new Planet Fitness opening up here in Laurinburg. Maybe I should join, just for the scenery of course.

Do you have a favorite memory of your children?

Of my bro-son, absolutely. The times at the college with him and the Mini-Me are awesome. Our first few conversations on MySpace after he came to work at Murphy’s hold a warm spot in my heart. And just the many times chillaxin’, doing the “VPP” and “Timmy” videos. Too many great memories to list them all.

Do they make adult onesies?

No, but they should and if they do, I want one.

Do you remember your last brain fart?

They happen so often, it’s hard to remember the last one. Probably at work last night talking to and admiring the young lads from St. Andrews. If I was twenty years younger, oy vey!

Do you remember your first brain freeze?

No, I do not.

What is your favorite ice cream flavor?

I always get the Neopolitan. I like vanilla and chocolate, just like my men.

What is your favorite sherbet flavor?

Orange or lime.

Are you a paranoid driver?

Not really. I trust MY driving skills. It’s the other idiots I worry about.

Have you ever ridden on a train?

I did when I was very young. Not many memories, but I’ve been told about it by my Mom and sister a few times.

Have you ever ridden on a trolley car?

Not that I’m aware of.

Do you have any weird talents?

Ask your boyfriend. He knows. So does your dad. And if your son is legal and curious, he’s liable to find out one day as well.

And there you go. Sorry for the lameness of this piece, but I’m just not feeling it right now. I’ll do better next time. My thanks for reading through the crap and putting up with me. Questions, comments, and any thoughts to share are welcome and appreciated. Until the next time, take care and I’ll see you on the flip side.

Ubuntu!

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