Tossing Salt Presents:
5 Questions:
Care Bears, Fact Checkers & More
December 6, 2021
DougMaynard.com

Let’s answer a few questions. And away we go.

If you were a Care Bear, what symbol would be on your belly?

I would say a beer mug on my belly would be appropriate, but in all honesty, I rarely drink anymore. Drunky Bear? In the past, it would be appropriate, and if things don’t work out as I hope in getting back to work soon, maybe in the near future too. Maybe a computer screen since I spend more time online these days than dealing with real people in person. So Puter Bear? And my final pick, a peg-legged but still sexy fat man with an “I’m A Jim Cornette Guy” t-shirt on. Put that picture on my chest and call me Stumpy Bear. And there you go.

When the fact-checkers are controlled by the same people doing the lying, what do you call it?

I call it Facebook and/or Twitter. I call it America 2021: The Pedo-Joe Years. And finally, I call it a freaking mess.

Do you like ice cream sandwiches?

Who doesn’t like ice cream sandwiches? It kind of makes the bread soggy as the ice cream melts, but sacrifices have to be made.

Have you ever thought about going back to school?

Yes, many times, but not in the sense that most would imagine. I want to go work at St. Andrews University in the men’s dormitory as a “Residence Director”. That way I could supervise all those young men and offer them advice, guidance, and a helping hand as they prepare for their futures. And also, I’d rock some sexy-ass worlds.

How do you say “I love you” without words?

Have you eaten yet? What you doing? Can I get you anything? Want to come over? Want to hang out? Nice butt! So many ways. It’s not the words that matter, but the meaning behind them and intent.

And there you go. My thanks for reading. Comments, thoughts, and any questions are welcome and appreciated. Until the next time, take care and stay good. I’ll see you on the other side.

Ubuntu!