Tossing Salt Presents:
Questions (Not) By Casper #38
Random Twitter Q&A
April 10, 2023
DougMaynard.com

Once upon a time, there was a man named Casper who lived on Twitter and asked lots of great questions. He asked and I would answer, thus Questions By Casper was born. But then one day, he vanished and I had to find another source for my Q&As. Well, Twitter stepped up and now provides me with lots of random questions. It’s not Casper anymore, but it’s still lots of great fun. Now it’s Questions (Not) By Casper. And it all starts right now. Let’s go.

Joe Rogan isn’t available, Can you name another Famous “Podcaster”?

Boy howdy, can I. I listen to wrestling podcasts quite frequently, plus have friends that have had their own podcasts, so naming a famous, or infamous podcaster as the case may be, is easy. Do we go with “The Podfather” Conrad Thompson? Do we go with the leader of the Cult of Cornette, James E. Cornette? Do we go with Brent Robinson, the man behind the SMF Cyberspace podcast? Maybe “The Fallen Artist” Derk Douglas with his “Gimmick Talk” podcast? There are so many options. Let’s go with a man who has guested on the SMF Podcast several times. “Who?”, you ask. Yeah, I’m talking about me. And Brent, if you’re ready to get the band back together, I’m ready. Call me.

What’s one thing you’ve been crazy about as a child and are still crazy about now?

Comics, Waylon Jennings, Alice Cooper, Muppets, and Pro Wrestling.

If it were up to you, who wouldn’t be allowed to vote?

No felons. No one without a valid ID. No one reeking of alcohol or pot when they come to the voting booth. And most importantly, no Justin Beiber fans.

Who would you pick to narrate your life?

Usually, I say Gilbert Gottfried or Joan Rivers, but they’re both dead so they probably wouldn’t be good options. I just like their distinct voices. But if I have to find someone else, how about Eric Cartman from South Park? Either Eric or Scooby Doo.

Be Honest, Do you often exceed the speed limit?

I’m a busy man with places to go and things to do so I may occasionally exceed the posted speed suggestions at times. As Sammy Hagar once said, “I can’t drive 55!”.

What’s the first sign that a movie is going to be bad?

If the names Rob Reiner, Bette Midler, Barbra Streisand, Wanda Sykes, or Miramax are anywhere in the credits, it’s going to suck!

Would you rather never be able to go out during the day or never be able to go out at night?

I don’t like or do daylight unless necessary. I am now and forever a creature of the night. I love the nightlife. I want to boogie. ‘Nuff said!

If you had one do-over to use, what would you use it on?

There are so many things over the past fifty-plus years that I would love to be able to take back or do over, I don’t know where to start or begin. Maybe the whole situation with Chris. Hell, I don’t know.

Did your parents hide your Easter Baskets for you to find?

Honestly, I can’t remember. I don’t think so, but I don’t know. I can’t remember ever getting Easter baskets. I’m sure that I did, but I don’t recall.

What part of a chocolate bunny do you eat first?

I always go for the ears first.

One thing that your ex gave you that you still have?

A strong distrust of people and their intentions. Those people I once welcomed into my world and gave everything to changed my life and perception and caused me to lose faith in humanity and build walls.

Do you still make your bed, even on your days off?

I straighten my covers, but that’s about it.

Who is your favorite Marvel character?

So far as writing and using as a character in my fan fiction stories, my go-to character is Dr. Anthony Ludgate Druid, an older and more obscure character created by Stan Lee back in the late 50s, predating The Fantastic Four, X-Men, or Dr. Strange. Druid is essentially a poor man’s Dr. Strange, but I find him a fascinating character.

Have you decided to boycott Anheuser Busch products? Yes or No?

Nope, I don’t believe in boycotts or any of that crappy, woken stuff. I like Bud Light and I like my Natural Light so who cares if it’s the beer of Gender Pretenders? So long as it’s cold and wet and there when I need a little kick and buzz, I don’t give a damn about political correctness and if the beer offends people or not.

And there you go. My thanks for reading. Comments, thoughts, and any questions are welcome and appreciated. And with that being said, it’s time to wrap things up. Take care and stay well, my friends. I’ll see you in the funny papers.

Ubuntu!