Tossing Salt Presents:
Ultimate X Q&A #140
Random Questions from the Land of Tweets
DougMaynard.com
Doug Maynard

Every day, my Twitter feed is filled with dozens of random questions. This is where I provide the answers. It’s the Ultimate X Q&A. My, how the time has flown by. It’s number 140, and I’m still standing. Let’s do this.

What household chores do you hate doing the most?

Cleaning the bathroom. It hurts to stand for very long, and my chair won’t fit through the bathroom doors.

Has anyone given you a strange gift? What was it?

Danny wrapped himself in a red ribbon one time and told me that he was mine. Would that count? And my bro gave me a Barbie with a prosthetic leg for Christmas last year. That was awesome.

What makes you jealous?

Seeing happy people, in a relationship, and having someone to love and share with. I don’t have that and it sucks!

What flower is your favorite?

I’ve always been partial to yellow roses.

What’s one body part that you wouldn’t even mind losing?

My right leg. Oops. Too late. My mind. Oops again. Too late. I want to keep every body part that I have left. Maybe about 15lbs of belly fat. Yeah, let’s go with that.

What would you serve if you were to make a special dinner for the family?

I’d probably go all the way with turkey, potatoes, baked beans, stuffing, deviled eggs, and whatever else I get the urge to fix. I generally only cook at Thanksgiving or Christmas, so it’s going big or not at all.

What are the things that drive you crazy?

The dog, the cat, my Mom, the doctors, and being alone.

Would you support revoking championships from every MAN who competed in Women’s sports?

Yes. Absolutely. Women’s sports are for women, not men with delusions and playing dress up.

Name something that upsets a Democrat.

Fairness, honesty, being happy, being creative, having questions, and anything that disagrees with their agenda.

What’s your favorite car brand?

I grew up a Chevy guy, but for the past few years, it’s been Ford Ranger trucks all the way.

What habits of other people do you definitely find disgusting?

Smoking, chewing with the mouth open, loud profanity in public, rudeness, and guys telling me no.

What do you miss the most about being a kid?

No real responsibilities. Getting older and being an adult sucks!

What’s your greatest philosophy in life?

If it feels good, do it. And in the words of Chuck Berry, Live and let live!

What is your favorite day of the week?

Monday. I seem to be able to accomplish more on Monday than any other day. Sundays are cool too.

What’s the weirdest Halloween costume you have ever worn in your entire life?

I did cheap-ho drag for one year at work. I looked scary, but marvelous.

Would you be willing to move to another country without your friends and family?

Right now, I would say yes. I can keep up with my bro & the family via text, much like I do now, but I don’t really have anything else to keep me here. Sign me up and I’m gone.

What is your biggest accomplishment in life so far?

I’m still alive and breathing. And I’ve made an impact on the site. So, staying alive and my writing.

On a scale of 1-10, how sexy are funny people?

Funny always gets a reaction. I’d say a solid 8.

And there you go. Thanks for reading. Comments, thoughts, and any questions are welcome and appreciated. Be sure to like, share, and subscribe. And with that, let’s close up the shop today. Take care and be well, my friends. I’ll see you at the office.

Ubuntu!